[Mindset Clarity Journal Post] Trade-offs of life

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NightRoller
Posts: 271 | Thanks: 79
Joined: Wed Jun 22, 2022 3:06 pm
Name: Graham
Goal: Get Career Job, Move
Age: 23
Motto: Win and help win
Location: Bumfuck Rural US
Contact:

Tue Oct 18, 2022 8:09 am

This post is formatted like a brainstorm-journal to clarify my thinking and recognize that I can't do everything all at once, and my current highest aims are suffering because I'm spreading myself too thin.

Feel free to input your thoughts on my ideas here, or write your own brainstorms in the comments if you like; this isn't meant to necessarily just be a personal thread for me if it could help someone else.
_____________________________________________________________

Right now, I feel like there are many things I'm trying to prioritize.
These include:
  • Getting stronger (e.g. gym/running)
  • Getting sleep
  • Watching cartoons for a show from my childhood
  • Going outside my dorm room more, whether out in the dorm commons or into surrounding buildings for studying/relaxing/non-eating
  • Keeping up with the few Youtube content creators I follow
  • Doing my homework well
  • Feeling like I'm doing something at all times
  • Trying many different foods at my workplace and restaurants around town
  • Trying several recipes and seeing what I like
  • Losing fat to the point of seeing abs
  • Hitting on/talking to girls as I go about my day
  • Using dating apps to set up dates
  • Trying to get laid more
  • Being active on these forums, posting here near-daily
  • Keeping up with the content from KYIL and other bloggers, e.g. RedQuest, sent to my email
  • Studying Japanese daily, at least a little bit
  • Building good relations with my coworkers and dorm-neighbors
  • Showing up to work on time and doing a decent job
  • Several things I've put to the side, including:
    • Writing a novel with some erotic elements, 3x as long as anything I've published
    • Several video games I want to return to, including Minecraft, some Pokemon from hacks, some Etrian Odyssey games, and more
    • A few books I want to finish (or start), both in paper form and on my computer
    • Working on any graduate school applications, because I'm not sure if I actually want to do that after all
    • Learning how to make serious money, network with people and make connections to build a business to reach the lofty goal of $100k/yr by the time I'm 30
    • Posting on my personal blog, inspired by RedQuest
    • Putting out more applications to other restaurants and bars to try to get on the ladder to bartender-dom
      Playing piano and a variety of music, including stuff from video games that I used to love that are a ton of fun to play songs from
    • Creating/composing music, learning how to use a DAW
    • Creating pixel art to practice
    • Creating a video game of my own


Recently, I've noticed that I'm suffering in terms of:
  • Sleep, been getting much less and more more inconsistently that I want
  • Homework, my work has been lower quality despite being unrushed, because I take my time to do it but do it tired because of the sleep I'm losing
  • Diet, because I stay in my room and watch cartoons and feel too tired from the day and want to "recharge", so I end up being right next to my food storage and frequently eat when I'm not hungry. Similarly at work, I am around a lot of food and have easy access to snagging a few fries every few minutes whenever I feel like it, and can easily binge 2-3 days' worth of food in a couple hours there with all the fat and carbs involved, and often fail to restrain myself
  • Exercise, because I'm tired and behind on homework and often wake up late, I sometimes don't have time to go to the gym or go on a run and end up going less hard when I do go
  • Hitting on/talking to girls as I go about my day, because I've been tired
  • Using dating apps to set up dates, because I got banned on Tinder & Hinge and don't have the time to dedicate to them to get serious results


What are my highest priorities? What do I WANT?
  1. Losing fat to the point of seeing abs
  2. Getting sleep so I feel well rested
  3. Doing my homework well until I graduate
  4. Being active on these forums
  5. Studying Japanese daily to keep up the habit and hone the skill
  6. Showing up to work on time and doing a decent job
  7. Getting stronger (e.g. gym/running)
What can I afford to stop prioritizing; e.g., if I took X out of my life for temporary or for good, my life will be better in the short-term present because I have more time, energy, and mental space to focus on my highest priorities?
  1. Watching cartoons for a show from my childhood; I don't really care about it that much and it's not particularly fun to watch anymore, life is more interesting now that I've gotten a taste (and anime is better than it anyway). Plus cutting it out will reduce how much I binge-eat.
  2. Keeping up with the few Youtube content creators I follow; running the content ratrace is just what Youtube wants from me, and how it makes its money. Why waste my time being their tool instead of using Youtube as MY tool? Plus cutting it down or out will reduce how much I binge-eat.
  3. Feeling like I'm doing something at all times; this just speaks to a lack of peace with being bored with my own thoughts. But it's not terrible to be that way; in fact, it helps me come to better ideas and be more ready to complete homework. Being bored, and thus uncomfortable, is a good feeling to cultivate.
  4. Trying many different foods at my workplace and restaurants around town; I don't need to try a bunch of foods, I've already tried a variation of most of them anyway. No need to waste money. Though I can try new things at my workplace, I want to take care to make sure I don't overindulge.
  5. Trying several recipes and seeing what I like; same as above, though it's fun to do sometimes. I may keep this one because it's becoming a better hobby than binge-watching stuff or playing video games.
  6. Several things I've put to the side; no need to re-add them when they're not needed as priorities. I can swap-in as necessary to fill in more destructive habits or priorities, but I don't want to take them off the "tabled for now" list just to put them right back on when I bite off more than I can chew.




So this was long. I have a lot of things I want to focus on, and a lot of things I'm putting effort into that I want to remove.
Making myself a summary:
The top 2 things I want to focus on are getting better sleep and losing weight. So everything will come secondary to that. And the top things I can remove are consuming media, e.g. youtube and cartoons, and removing the fill-in I do when I want to feel "productive" that just distracts me and is used as a coping mechanism to turn me away from my life itself and how much I dislike reality sometimes.

Living in reality is a privilege few take. I'll be one of those people to do the hard thing and live in reality, get shredded halfway to a bodybuilder from having a protruding belly, and chronicle my escapades in this real land of beauty we have the opportunity to live in.

Now, I'm tired. It's time to take steps to fulfill one of these goals of mine.
Goals: See this post
Skill-based 365 project
Laycount: 28 --- In 2023: 12 (as of May 03'23)
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