How to stop watching P?

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ziva
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Mon Apr 10, 2023 9:18 am

Renton wrote:
Sun Apr 09, 2023 9:39 pm
I don't understand why guys want to stop watching porn or why they bother doing nofap.

It won't affect your ability to get laid unless it's extreme. The nofap movement is so retarded
I just can't regularly watch porn and feel good about that. I have friends who are opposite to this as well.
When I don't watch porn for a while life feels more fun and fresh. It's not even about getting laid at this point.
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Squilliam
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Mon Apr 10, 2023 1:45 pm

Renton wrote:
Sun Apr 09, 2023 9:39 pm
I don't understand why guys want to stop watching porn or why they bother doing nofap.

It won't affect your ability to get laid unless it's extreme. The nofap movement is so retarded
I used to feel similarly, but I disagree.

Well, I certainly doubt all the claims from NoFap that it makes you more "confident" or makes you get noticed more, or some shit like that, I'm sure it's all confirmation bias and placebo.

But there are absolutely benefits to doing NoFap.

It's also important to note that there are two aspects to this. Porn and masturbation. You can have one without the other.

Porn is undoubtedly harmful when used regularly. No, it won't affect our ability to get laid per se, but it can affect your ability to get aroused, and your expectations surrounding sex. Pretty sure there are studies that show that your real life expectations go up if you watch a lot of porn. And like, humans were not intended to be able to look at a million different naked girls at the click of a button. It's too much stimulus.

And in my case, excessive masturbation (1-3+ times almost daily for the past 7 years), has lead to a death grip problem which as a result has made me not enjoy the overwhelming majority of my sexual encounters.

Now, I do agree that doing NoFap is stupid if you don't have a problem with masturbation or porn. Masturbation is healthy tbh, moderation is just needed. Whereas porn is really just not healthy at all. It's like alcohol I would say. If you only consume a little bit the damage is negligible, but constant consumption will destroy your brain and mental health.
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einherjar
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Mon Apr 10, 2023 2:12 pm

Renton wrote:
Sun Apr 09, 2023 9:39 pm
I don't understand why guys want to stop watching porn or why they bother doing nofap.

It won't affect your ability to get laid unless it's extreme. The nofap movement is so retarded
Nice thread. As a guy who got into that stuff 5y ago:
@ziva I don't think fapping & watching the occasional clip is bad per se - it matters more why you're doing it.
Having had a stressful week, got an hour to kill on a Sunday and wanna relax a bit by watching some homemade couple going at it? Fine.
Beating the shit out of your meat on a daily basis as as way to procrastinate on stuff while watching some hardcore-staged Brazzers gangbang?
Not fine.

If you're interested in how porn/beating off to it can affect you if you abuse it, read Gary Wilsons' "Your Brain on Porn".
Apart from that, it comes down to if you're willing to put in the time watching that stuff / beating off.
Personally, I ride the NoFap train for 2,5y straight now. Almost no Porn. Do I feel bad / horny / like I'm missing out on stuff? No.
Has it helped (especially the latter) with me being a better partner + saving time? Yeah, definitely.
Granted, I'm in a relationship and do approaching so sex is not an issue. I think if you manage to get either one down, things will take care of itself :- )
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Skelly92
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Sun Apr 16, 2023 2:52 pm

I personally quit porn about 2 years ago using the easy peasy method (19/05/2021 - I put the date in my calendar) and I would recommend it if you want to quit porn (it is free aswell), which you can find here https://easypeasymethod.org/.
I have had a one or two relapses, but only when I have been deleted/ clearing out my old porn that I had on my computer/selling old mags I had.
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ziva
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Sun Apr 16, 2023 5:42 pm

Skelly92 wrote:
Sun Apr 16, 2023 2:52 pm
I personally quit porn about 2 years ago using the easy peasy method (19/05/2021 - I put the date in my calendar) and I would recommend it if you want to quit porn (it is free aswell), which you can find here https://easypeasymethod.org/.
I have had a one or two relapses, but only when I have been deleted/ clearing out my old porn that I had on my computer/selling old mags I had.
Bet. I'll give it a read.
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ziva
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Mon Jul 17, 2023 1:50 pm

Haven't posted on here for a while now. I want to start off by giving a huge shoutout to @Skelly92 . You mentioned the free online hackbook https://read.easypeasymethod.org/ to me. This pretty short but insightful book goes into detail on what porn is, and how to overcome the addiction. Yes, it's an addiction. If you've watched it regularly for years, you've either never tried to stop, or you can't (yet). If anyone who's reading this is actually serious about curb stomping their porn use to absolute 0, give this book a read. It took me more than 1 full read (I'm re-reading for the 3rd time now), and some months to come to the realizations on why I kept watching something I knew I didn't want to. You actually HAVE to give this addiction a lot of conscious thought and time if you want to beat it. I've been watching since I was 8 or 9. That's 13 years of indoctrination you have to undo. I will say, with the right amount of thought it will not take another 13 years to stop the addiction. But don't be surprised that if you try to stop, you might keep watching again for weeks or months. You have to cultivate a new mindset over time.

I've been putting off writing about this topic because I was afraid. "What if I tell everyone that I beat porn, but end up "relapsing?". But thoughts like these are also part of the reason why you might "relapse". Being afraid, is part of the reason why you keep watching porn. "What if I don't end up having sex for a whole year? Does that mean I can't even get to orgasm to porn?" These are thoughts I had. When I look at these thoughts now I think, what was I so scared of? I used to keep track of how many days/weeks I didn't watch porn, but I deleted that app. I think it has been around 3 weeks now. The book says that the first 3 weeks referred to as "The withdrawal period" is the time where you're the most prone to "relapse". In these last 3 weeks there were a handful of times where I felt this urge to watch porn. At least these used to be urges. Now I see these feelings as the porn monsters (yes I actually call them monsters) doing everything they can to keep me addicted. Because everything porn is, is a toxic addiction. Before I read the book I didn't think like this at all. Even after reading the book between 1-2 times I still watched porn, because I thought I still craved it from time to time. It really came down to internalizing what the book teaches you, and asking yourself why it is, that you keep on watching. I even found a pdf of someone who added important points to the book, which I'm still reading right now.

All I can say is, no amount of distraction, or sexual partners will help you to STAY off porn for ever. If you believe that porn is ok to use, you will keep using forever. If you want to stop, but you believe that you can't because it feels too good, you will keep using forever. Overcoming my porn addiction taught me a lot about how important it is to realize what you believe in. There's a lot of power in that (I'm realizing this as I'm typing). I told @Skelly92 that I would give the book a read on 04-16-2023. It still feels a bit weird, but 3 months later I can say that I've actually kicked this mentally draining addiction.... Now I want you to do it too! I've linked to the book at the beginning of this post. I've you're even just a little curious, I would recommend you to read it. It might change your life. (Btw I'm not sponsored :lol: . The book is free. Overcoming my porn addiction is just something that was REALLY important to me, so it might be to you too)
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hush
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Mon Jul 17, 2023 3:43 pm

ziva wrote:
Mon Jul 17, 2023 1:50 pm
I even found a pdf of someone who added important points to the book, which I'm still reading right now.
Can you share?

Congrats on the progress and thanks for your openness :)
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Ed_
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Mon Jul 17, 2023 4:05 pm

jakeD wrote:
Mon Apr 10, 2023 8:12 pm
My dick is just trash unless i'm on nofap and so is my vibe and sexual energy and the power behind my escalations.
Going back to @ziva 's original question, focusing on the positive sex benefits from no-fap has helped me more than any other method. Instead of the usual negative motivation (I shouldn't fap this, it's bad), I've moved to a positive motivation (I want to have the best sex possible with this next girl, so I want to not fap).
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Skelly92
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Mon Jul 17, 2023 7:48 pm

@ziva Glad to hear that it has been of use to you and you have been able to quit porn.
Well done!
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ziva
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Tue Jul 18, 2023 4:27 am

hush wrote:
Mon Jul 17, 2023 3:43 pm
ziva wrote:
Mon Jul 17, 2023 1:50 pm
I even found a pdf of someone who added important points to the book, which I'm still reading right now.
Can you share?

Congrats on the progress and thanks for your openness :)
No problem, here you go!
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
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ziva
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Tue Jul 18, 2023 4:28 am

Skelly92 wrote:
Mon Jul 17, 2023 7:48 pm
@ziva Glad to hear that it has been of use to you and you have been able to quit porn.
Well done!
:)
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ziva
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Tue Jul 18, 2023 4:37 am

Ed_ wrote:
Mon Jul 17, 2023 4:05 pm

Going back to @ziva 's original question, focusing on the positive sex benefits from no-fap has helped me more than any other method. Instead of the usual negative motivation (I shouldn't fap this, it's bad), I've moved to a positive motivation (I want to have the best sex possible with this next girl, so I want to not fap).
I agree. If you can work yourself up to a point where you don't even want to watch porn and fap, that's when you will actually see success. You can think about porn, feel the sensations, and still go "Nah I don't even want to do that because of (your personal reason)". I think the reason for not wanting to PMO might be at least a little different for everyone. Finding out your reason is what can take some time and introspective thought.
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Olafsmash
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Sat Jul 22, 2023 11:37 am

Great points from ya'all. I want to add another method which is proving really effective for myself.

A QUALITY BLOCKER

I'm not talking about a shitty one that you can uninstall yourself or bypass easily. Porn is a ridicilously hard addiction to beat with willpower alone. I could read easypeasy and all sorts of other material, including testaments from people who beat the addiction, but then still relapse on a bad day. For me a good blocker is making the battle a lot easier. I'd probably relapse right now if it wasnt for the blocker. I love porn lol

I always discounted a blocker before because i thought i'd just find an easy way to bypass it, but the one i'm using is a pain to bypass. Before the blocker, my mind would decide: today were gonna watch porn and it became this day long battle to resist. Now there's no longer a drawn out battle to not click. It's no longer avaiable with a single click.

Blocker i'm using is called canopy. it doesnt come without some minor hurdles though. you'll need a friend to have control of the parent interface, and the blocker isn't perfect. it's gonna block some shit that doesnt need to be blocket and your friend is gonna have to grant permission to certain sites, like KYIL.
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Jacobpalmer123
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Sat Jul 22, 2023 7:36 pm

Something that helped me was to give my buddy 100 bucks if I relapsed. Any thoughts I have of starting I just remember that 100 dollars. Its very effective
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Sat Jul 22, 2023 10:19 pm

What worked for me is slowing turning it off. I told myself softcore was okay, but not actual porn. Then social media okay, but not anything else. Eventually you will have the same cycle of thoughts as for which you are quitting actual porn as for soft porn and will quit that too. I’m 2 years in and it has improved my confidence, my daily focus, and made me objectify girls less. Expect a 1.5-2year journey to really see the benefits which are gradual.
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