My deepest dream that I truly need your help with

InsaneAndHappyWithIt · Thu Aug 13, 2020 11:14 am

This is going to sound funny to some of you, but it's been huge problem for someone like me...

I want to be living alone. Have my own apartment.

I'm just so fucking sick and tired of having those random flatmates. I hate their guts.

I don't earn enough to have my own apartment. I have no papers that'd give me a job paying for a solo apartment. A significant upgrade for me would be to share an apartment with someone who has similar goals to me - to become self-dependent, to improve. The people that are around usually don't care about having their own place to work in or are codependent as fuck. I despise codependency.

I'm living in Netherlands now, in an emplyoment agency "building" (really a construction work-like barrack). I'm so sick of this. Listening to trash rap and staying around people who don't have a drive of their own. How do I find a flatmate?

I feel that as long as I'm living in those shitty apartments with randos, everything seems to be hard work... There's always some bullshit around the corner: people throwing out my stuff outta the fridge, the fridge being too small, I can't laundry my fucking clothes coz the washing machines are paid for (sic!) and I barely use physical money.

Jeez. I don't need to convince you it's bad. What do I do? I'm pissed. I need my own room. I'm too much of a solitary person. I need enormous amounts of space or I want to kill someone within a couple weeks time.

SIGMA_1234 · Thu Aug 13, 2020 11:18 am

Good. We have the same goal actually: to get our own place. Now you have a goal. What do you think you need to do to achieve that goal?

InsaneAndHappyWithIt · Thu Aug 13, 2020 11:29 am

I need to earn substantial amount of money to support that apartment. Right now I'm working a physical labour day job that would only support a shared apartment.

As for how do I earn that kind of money, I don't know. My live is ridden with money problems, I've been living past 24 years on welfare money. I have skills - audio, music, sound design - they're not ideal, but I believe good enough to base some income work on already. But working on mastering and marketing them is hard when I don't have my own room. I woke up 8am yesterday ready to work on music and by the time I was eating breakfast there was horrible rap blasting in the living room.

So I think getting just a damn room with a flatmate or two (that have the mindset) would be good first step.

Another thing is I want to finally get out and play my music live on parties. It's just something that I desire, maybe even more than the own apartment thing. As long as someone doesn't get in my way too often, it's great. I want to be a star and I believe I can do it, I have the personality and drive for it.

SIGMA_1234 · Thu Aug 13, 2020 11:53 am

Great. Just like I have done (but nowhere near my goal yet), keep yourself accountable here with a log towards your goals.

AGF and Andy have been telling me that the cheat code to self-improvement is just working on your goals daily, even for a few hours. Even just a simple step for the day will make you closer to your goals. The key is to be consistent.