Trouble with conspicuous day game approaches

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Yggdrasil13
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Age: 27
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Mon Jan 09, 2023 5:27 am

I’ve pretty much beaten approach anxiety at night since I can approach 10+ girls every night sober.

However, I want to get into day game too and am finding it hard. I’ve done a few day approaches this week using GLL’s basic guy game, but they all were on the easier side (no one else was around, girl was alone, girl wasn’t moving, I was already walking in that direction.)

Needless to say it is time consuming to wait for these exact circumstances.

For an example of a harder approach, there are always hot women in the make up section of the target by me, but it’s really hard to go up to them because I have no pretext to walk into that section and there are usually other attractive women in earshot. Just feels very conspicuous and I am terrified of being noticed.

Any advice on how to approach a girl in a situation like that smoothly? Like do you walk over making eye contact the whole way? Things like that.
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september
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Name: Loki
Goal: master game
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Location: Toronto

Mon Jan 09, 2023 5:53 am

I'm very similar

No real approach anxiety but a decent amount of audience anxiety (feeling judged by society for the circumstances in which you do the approach)

solutions:
- be higher value/raise your perception of your own value to match your real value
- be more goal oriented; when your internal frame is you're trying to get laid and just don't fucking give a shit about anything else like looking weird it's a lot easier to ignore the audience
- play out interactions in your head. let's say you're worried someone stops you because you're doing something weird. actually imagine having the conversation with them and continue it all the way to the end; you'll realize that if you just own what you're doing (yep I'm just out here talking to girls) they end up looking like the stupid one. this convinces you that what you're doing is normal
- get jacked, good at martial arts, carry pepper spray/a gun. some amount of audience anxiety comes from feeling like the men surrounding you could take you in a fight. being more likely to win a fight will make it easier to approach girls
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NightRoller
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Mon Jan 09, 2023 7:23 am

Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Mon Jan 09, 2023 5:27 am
For an example of a harder approach, there are always hot women in the make up section of the target by me, but it’s really hard to go up to them because I have no pretext to walk into that section and there are usually other attractive women in earshot. Just feels very conspicuous and I am terrified of being noticed.

Any advice on how to approach a girl in a situation like that smoothly? Like do you walk over making eye contact the whole way? Things like that.
As my coach has oft told me, look for some contextual opener. I have trouble thinking of these in the moment when in the hot seat, but with practice it becomes easier (I've heard). Anyway, my first intuition for this kind of circumstance would be to say "hey, I'm looking for xx makeup/lipgloss/etc. for a female friend, do you know any 'safe' colors?" and then talk about it for a bit, then give her a solid look like you're actually seeing her and saying "you know, you're actually pretty cute." and asking a question (like, does she come here often, where is she from, what's her background, what's that tattoo she has, etc.), and going from there.

A second option that came to mind is to tease her about whatever color of makeup she's looking at and saying "it looks good, but it doesn't fit your energy/vibe per se" or something along those lines. She's getting makeup, which implies to me she cares about appearance, so mentioning something along those lines about her appearance is likely to get a response.


Also, you are A MAN, and you don't need a reason to go through the makeup aisle besides that you're curious to check it out. Or that you're curious to check out the people in that aisle. Especially the cute girls. Give yourself permission to go into the "lions den" to go after what you want.
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MakingAComeback
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Mon Jan 09, 2023 8:16 am

Hey @Yggdrasil13

Welcome!

Great to have you here dude.

Good post, but let me help you use the forum better:

We're an action-oriented forum, and we encourage our members to avoid theoretical-focus. Instead, here's what we like to see:
  • Start a Progress Log
  • Tell us your story and your goals
  • Take action and log your journey
  • Ask any questions you may have in your log :) If you want to alert us to your question, you can do so my editing the first post of your log, and changing the title to reflect your question
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