Where to move to in the US? - Autistic City Comparisons

Meetups, advice/questions about specific locations, etc.
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Ed_
Posts: 13 | Thanks: 15
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2020 1:08 am
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 32
Location: NY

Thu Jul 02, 2020 1:42 am

I currently live in Buffalo, NY and my IT job is transitioning to fully work from home. I'm looking to move when my lease is up in November.

I'm looking to move somewhere to maximize my dating life. My long term goals are pretty typical: multiple fuckbuddies with attractive young women (18 - 23 years old).

I'm open to moving pretty much anywhere in the US. I'd prefer somewhere warmer (been living with NY winters my entire life), but if the dating opportunities are active year round, it doesn't really matter. My city is pretty suburban and most women huddle up inside for 6 months of the year.

I make $80k a year, so I think most cities are within grasp, especially if I can ditch my car (no commute, since I'm working from home).

So tell me what's great about your city and neighborhood. Are there lots of sexually open, attractive women? What is the street life like -- are there plenty of attractive women that are approachable during the day? How is the nightlife and bar scene for meeting women?

Side Note: how do young women afford to live in the "hot" parts of big cities (NYC, LA, etc)? In my experience in my city, most of the women who are 21 and younger, live with their parents in the suburbs or on college campuses. It seems that by moving into the more attractive parts of big cities, that I'm "pricing myself out" of the younger women I'm most interested in.
Last edited by Ed_ on Tue Jul 14, 2020 9:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Current Goals:
✅ Lose virginity
✅ Have sex with the same girl a second time
✅ Overcome AA
⚪ Have sex with the same girl a third time
⚪ Move to a city with better dating options by the end of 2020
⚪ Get to 140 lbs with 10% bodyfat

My Tinder photos thread
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Ed_
Posts: 13 | Thanks: 15
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2020 1:08 am
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 32
Location: NY

Tue Jul 14, 2020 9:45 pm

I went full autistic and made a table comparing different aspects of every city I’m considering moving to. 

I haven’t posted about it much, but the lockdowns here in NY have seriously been impacting my quality of life and dating life. The lack of gym access (still closed in NY, with no guidelines/timeline for reopening) has really thrown off my mental health and completely destroyed my mentality for approaching and dating.

I also added New Hampshire as a possible location. From a libertarian perspective, it is one of the best possible places to live in the entire world -- low taxes, few regulations, and a large libertarian community to socialize with. I’ve visited a few times and I have made friends with people there; moving there is definitely in consideration for my long term life plans. However for my current goals of an active dating life it’s pretty horrible -- most of the state is rural with small towns and a car-friendly suburban vibe. The largest city is 400k people (that’s the entire 1hr travel radius metro area). There isn’t a large college population and I get the feeling that most young women (especially the sexually open ones) move away.

NH was one of the least restrictive places during the lockdowns and one of the first to fully re-open. Even during lockdowns, libertarians were having meetups with dozens of people and life was basically uninterrupted. I’m considering moving there temporarily (just a few months), to enjoy some freedom and return to normalcy, while I and see how things play out in other places.

Probably of lockdows - If I’m living in an otherwise amazing place, but I can’t go to the gym and lockdowns are impacting every aspect of my dating life, it’s worth considering if that is really a good place to move to. California just re-entered a pretty severe lockdown, I’d be surprised if they aren’t in-and-out of lockdown for the rest of the year. NYC (and my current city of Buffalo) are also hard-core pro-lockdown and I wouldn't be surprised to be locked down again if there is any sort of spike this upcoming fall/winter. Austin and Miami seem like typical liberal cities, but Texas and Florida have been resistant to major lockdowns so far.

Quality of life w/o lockdown - Given that I’m mostly focused on gym and dating young women right now, it’s basically a tie between any major cities. My underachieving sex life has been my primary hurdle my entire adult life and it’s the #1 thing I need to work on right now. Like Chris says, you gotta prioritize your sex life so you can get it handled and psychologically move on to other things. Finding “my scene”, being close to activities/hobbies I like, living in a place I find culturally compatible, etc. aren't really questions I can answer until I figure out this “getting laid” thing.

Impact / probability of civil unrest -  I probably worry about this more than I should, but rioting in my city last month canceled a few of my dates and literally cockblocked me from a girl who I had invited over. Without going into it, I don’t think we’re done with the BLM protests -- the George Floyd trial will be next year and I’m certain the cop will be acquitted -- so next year is going to have some rough times too. I really don’t want to go through the stress of riots outside my window -- at least not without an easy way to bug out while things blow over. Austin seems ideal, since even if there are riots, I can easily make friends with gun loving Texans outside the city and have a place to get away from it.

Availability of datable women - This is keeping in mind that my primary dating target right now is 18-23 year old women. So large universities and easy travel to younger women living in the suburbs is ideal. From what I’ve read, NYC is great for dating 20s/30s professional women, but it doesn’t seem like that huge a younger crowd.

Cost of living - I can afford any of these cities, but LA and NYC are stretching it. Like I said before, my focus is on getting laid -- I have solid savings and I'm not prioritizing living in a cheaper place.

Cost / effort of moving - NYC is closest, Austin and Miami are further. LA is much further.
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Current Goals:
✅ Lose virginity
✅ Have sex with the same girl a second time
✅ Overcome AA
⚪ Have sex with the same girl a third time
⚪ Move to a city with better dating options by the end of 2020
⚪ Get to 140 lbs with 10% bodyfat

My Tinder photos thread
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KillYourInnerLoser
Posts: 516 | Thanks: 371
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Name: Andy
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Age: 33
Motto: "You sure as hell can too."
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Tue Jul 14, 2020 10:25 pm

Nice.
You already know my opinions on this:
- Whichever place you move to, you'll make it work. Just go all-in on that place and make the most of it.
- Wherever you choose, you can always just move again if you really don't like it. You don't have to get it perfect in one go.
- Lockdown/quarantine/people being scared distorts things. So a city that sucks now, may be good in a year from now. And a city that's great now, may suck in comparison in a year from now. So maybe it's worth moving somewhere that's decent during corona bullshit, and then when the corona bullshit lifts, consider moving to a better place.
- Gym gym gym. You've said 100 times how important that is to you, so give that a really high importance.

Again, the first dotpoint is the most important. Wherever you go, you'll make the most of it.
Andy / Australia
My Transformation

140+ lays / 14 threesomes / 1 foursome (MFFF)
Goals 2020: Pay all bills from coaching. Finish 3some & BDSM guides.
PM me for 1-on-1 coaching
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dashedhopes
Posts: 57 | Thanks: 63
Joined: Mon Jun 15, 2020 7:20 am
Name: Tristan Nigro
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Age: 24
Motto: Anything is better than nothing.
Location: Canada
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Tue Jul 14, 2020 11:18 pm

Glad you put my options on there haha.

ARe Miami and Austin really more expensive than NYC? [edit] sorry read your graph wrong lol, NYC is way more expensive. I'd personally stay out of LA and NYC. Could be appealing to be in one of those hotspots but just seems like concrete jungle places.

https://www.numbeo.com/cost-of-living/c ... e%20tax%29.

Looked at a comparison of JacksonVille vs Miami.

Maybe add that on your list.

Significantly cheaper - notably: 1 bedroom prices in city center - Miami: 1,828.22 $ Jacksonville: 1,142.83 $

Probably not as fun in Jacksonville, I'd assume BUT it has double the population, which means more single women.
OIP (1).jpg
Fuck that place actually looks dope af.

Nice beaches, big city, lots of girls, cheaper than Miami.

Just a thought, sorry I love travelling and moving to different places so I get really into this haha.
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24 years young.

Tristan - Canada

Youtube Channel - https://bit.ly/2CbEbKK (Road to 10k Before End of 2021)
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KillYourInnerLoser
Posts: 516 | Thanks: 371
Joined: Fri May 29, 2020 7:03 am
Name: Andy
Goal: Writing full-time.
Age: 33
Motto: "You sure as hell can too."
Location: Australia
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Tue Jul 14, 2020 11:46 pm

@dashedhopes , you plan on always living in Canada, or moving to the USA at some point? You seem hella passionate about the US; you talk about it a lot.
Andy / Australia
My Transformation

140+ lays / 14 threesomes / 1 foursome (MFFF)
Goals 2020: Pay all bills from coaching. Finish 3some & BDSM guides.
PM me for 1-on-1 coaching
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DNPTHC
Posts: 116 | Thanks: 76
Joined: Sun Jul 05, 2020 6:44 am
Goal: Get Laid Again
Age: 25
Motto: Just Try

Wed Jul 15, 2020 12:02 am

@dashedhopes
Florida is an amazing state....

Miami isn’t the only great city in Florida. Jacksonville, Orlando, and Tampa are all amazing cities with A LOT of hotties. All of which are very low cost of living, whole lot of fun stuff to do in Florida.
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Ed_
Posts: 13 | Thanks: 15
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2020 1:08 am
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 32
Location: NY

Wed Jul 15, 2020 1:44 am

Miami isn’t the only great city in Florida. Jacksonville, Orlando, and Tampa are all amazing cities with A LOT of hotties. All of which are very low cost of living, whole lot of fun stuff to do in Florida.
Miami is really a placeholder for any major Florida city -- I haven't settled on any one.

I've only really explored Orlando. It felt very suburban and really spread out. The only walkable urban areas seemed to be downtown and the ritzy rich people area of Winter Park. There is the huge University of Central Florida, but it's almost totally separated by itself away from the rest of the city. It seems like logistics would be much harder when girls live on a segregated campus or they compute from some suburban area. Compare The urban campus of University of Texas at Austin (51,000 students) with University of Central Florida (68,000 students).

My ideal is living in an urban area; very close to a commercial strip with bars, cafes, restaurants, etc; and also close to a large university (with a large student population that lives nearby, on- or off-campus).
Last edited by Ed_ on Wed Jul 15, 2020 2:21 am, edited 1 time in total.
Current Goals:
✅ Lose virginity
✅ Have sex with the same girl a second time
✅ Overcome AA
⚪ Have sex with the same girl a third time
⚪ Move to a city with better dating options by the end of 2020
⚪ Get to 140 lbs with 10% bodyfat

My Tinder photos thread
User avatar
dashedhopes
Posts: 57 | Thanks: 63
Joined: Mon Jun 15, 2020 7:20 am
Name: Tristan Nigro
Goal: Increase Sub Count
Age: 24
Motto: Anything is better than nothing.
Location: Canada
Contact:

Wed Jul 15, 2020 2:19 am

KillYourInnerLoser wrote:
Tue Jul 14, 2020 11:46 pm
@dashedhopes , you plan on always living in Canada, or moving to the USA at some point? You seem hella passionate about the US; you talk about it a lot.
Nah not always.

I'll probably move to the US at some point but I just like travelling and switching up my environment. I get really bored of one place pretty quickly.

Lived in a lot of different areas for months at a time.

US is very hard to get into and stay there. Max for me is 6 months of a year.

Basically have to have a degree for a needed profession, have 100k invested into a US company or get super lucky on a lottery draw. Was trying to get a visa.
24 years young.

Tristan - Canada

Youtube Channel - https://bit.ly/2CbEbKK (Road to 10k Before End of 2021)
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benstrong26
Posts: 42 | Thanks: 26
Joined: Thu Jun 11, 2020 1:53 am
Name: Ben
Goal: Get 2 FBs
Age: 30

Wed Jul 15, 2020 2:57 am

I wouldn’t put Austin at an A when it comes to lockdowns. Texas is a mess right now. If the Governor allowed it, the local government in Austin would have already instituted a lockdown. People are getting desperate because they need to but are scared to send their kids to school.

Overall though, Austin is a pretty good city. Just be warned, it is HOT in the summer. It will be nothing like you’ve experienced in Buffalo. Texas weather blows, it’s a major reason I’m considering a move when my lease is up next year.
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Ed_
Posts: 13 | Thanks: 15
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2020 1:08 am
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 32
Location: NY

Wed Jul 15, 2020 12:55 pm

I wouldn’t put Austin at an A when it comes to lockdowns. Texas is a mess right now. If the Governor allowed it, the local government in Austin would have already instituted a lockdown. People are getting desperate because they need to but are scared to send their kids to school.
Even if the city institutes a lockdown, aren't there less liberal suburbs close by where things will be more open? I'm not looking for some utopia where things stays open (like New Hampshire or South Dakota) -- I just need gyms, places to take dates, and some places to keep approaching women. Enough to keep my routines and life progress moving.
Just be warned, it is HOT in the summer. It will be nothing like you’ve experienced in Buffalo. Texas weather blows, it’s a major reason I’m considering a move when my lease is up next year.
How does this impact lifestyle and opportunities for approaching? The worst part of winters in NY is everyone bundles up and stays inside for 6 months of the year. Minimal time outdoors and even in public spaces like grocery stores, people just get in, get out, and get back in their cars to drive home.

Is everyone hiding from the heat inside with the AC all summer? Even in the evenings when things cool off a bit? That's my biggest fear... a major shutdown of social life for half the year.
Current Goals:
✅ Lose virginity
✅ Have sex with the same girl a second time
✅ Overcome AA
⚪ Have sex with the same girl a third time
⚪ Move to a city with better dating options by the end of 2020
⚪ Get to 140 lbs with 10% bodyfat

My Tinder photos thread
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benstrong26
Posts: 42 | Thanks: 26
Joined: Thu Jun 11, 2020 1:53 am
Name: Ben
Goal: Get 2 FBs
Age: 30

Wed Jul 15, 2020 7:55 pm

Even if the city institutes a lockdown, aren't there less liberal suburbs close by where things will be more open? I'm not looking for some utopia where things stays open (like New Hampshire or South Dakota) -- I just need gyms, places to take dates, and some places to keep approaching women. Enough to keep my routines and life progress moving.
Typically lockdowns in Texas have been on the county level and since Travis County is liberal as a whole you would be SOL. If that’s a really important factor to you then you would be better off moving to Dallas, since the neighboring suburbs are in a conservative county.
How does this impact lifestyle and opportunities for approaching? The worst part of winters in NY is everyone bundles up and stays inside for 6 months of the year. Minimal time outdoors and even in public spaces like grocery stores, people just get in, get out, and get back in their cars to drive home.

Is everyone hiding from the heat inside with the AC all summer? Even in the evenings when things cool off a bit? That's my biggest fear... a major shutdown of social life for half the year.
You’ll find people in places like bars and restaurants but you don’t want to spend time outside when it is over 100 (pool parties are the exception, those are very common in the summer). It lasts for about 3 months.
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Forticks
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Goal: Build Power, Get Laid
Age: 20
Location: United States

Thu Jul 16, 2020 4:37 am

I live close to NH. Very pretty and lots of hiking spots but unfortunately not very many people in most of the state. Manchester is the biggest city with 112,000 but it's pretty trashy (the locals call it manchganistan), if you want to be in an affluent/nice area with decent population the seacoast (near Portsmouth) is a good bet.
Last edited by Forticks on Sat Jul 25, 2020 5:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Early 20s guy living in the US. I want to have an awesome live.
Goals:
Practice spanish daily
1/2 hour practicing guitar per day
1/2 hour reading per day
Do a home workout every other day while maintaining a deficit
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KillYourInnerLoser
Posts: 516 | Thanks: 371
Joined: Fri May 29, 2020 7:03 am
Name: Andy
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Age: 33
Motto: "You sure as hell can too."
Location: Australia
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Thu Jul 16, 2020 7:11 am

Chipping in - I lived in a hot-as-fuck area for about 14 years. The town was Broome, Australia - check out the temperatures/humidy and you'll see it's basically the same as Austin, but the hot months last the entire year (it's a tropical/monsoonal area near the equator). The maximum temperature is above 86F/30C for the entire year:
broome.png


I can't speak for Austin, but you do get used to the heat. In Broome, everywhere had AC. And once you live in a place for 6 months you get used to the temperature anyway. You can definitely make Austin work; I personally think hot is easier to deal with than cold anyway. People don't go outside much when it's cold, and almost nobody when it's raining. But plenty of people go outside when it's hot - especially in the evenings when the sun goes down.

As I said to you, wherever you move, you'll make it work. Every single city has flaws/compromises; so just work around them and make the most of the situation.
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Andy / Australia
My Transformation

140+ lays / 14 threesomes / 1 foursome (MFFF)
Goals 2020: Pay all bills from coaching. Finish 3some & BDSM guides.
PM me for 1-on-1 coaching
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Ed_
Posts: 13 | Thanks: 15
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2020 1:08 am
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 32
Location: NY

Fri Jul 17, 2020 1:33 am

@Forticks
I live in NH. Very pretty and lots of hiking spots but unfortunately not very many people in most of the state. Manchester is the biggest city with 112,000 but it's pretty trashy (people call it manchganistan), if you want to be in an affluent/nice area with decent population the seacoast (near Portsmouth) is a good bet.
Yeah, Manchester seems pretty trashy and Portsmouth is much nicer. But the population is even less there; nothing but small towns and no colleges.

Do you do daytime approaches on women? Have you done the AA program? I feel like NH would be a difficult place to pull those off.

Also, what's online dating like in your area?
Current Goals:
✅ Lose virginity
✅ Have sex with the same girl a second time
✅ Overcome AA
⚪ Have sex with the same girl a third time
⚪ Move to a city with better dating options by the end of 2020
⚪ Get to 140 lbs with 10% bodyfat

My Tinder photos thread
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