Being too picky

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mikkel
Posts: 46 | Thanks: 9
Joined: Mon May 01, 2023 4:01 pm
Goal: Find GF
Age: 29
Motto: Dont prejudice if you dont know
Location: Fin

Sat Jul 01, 2023 2:28 pm

I don't know if this is a problem or not but I am very picky with women and I dont push conversations into dates on Tinder if something seems off. And this is bothering me. Am I missing opportunities or actually saving time?

-First one is vibe, if the girl doesnt ask me anything or if her replies are generic and boring, I usually dont push it into a date, because I feel like we wont vibe face to face neither.

-Second is pictures, if the girl has a few decent photos but then one bad one, I immediately see her as unattractive and not worth of my time to meet.

-Third is appearance, if she has too much make up, her style is off, or if theres EVEN ONE THING that turns me off (not my type of hands for example lol) I just swipe left. OR if I see she is OK but then I find her social media and I find turn off photos, I dont continue the convo.

How I should deal with this, is this okay or should I push it? Also you guys should know that I always try do quick 1st date and I dont try to close on first date unless she invites me to her place.

I prefer 2nd dates cuz I have problems to get horny on 1st dates, I need some kind of connection.
Also if you have solution for this, let me know (I barely fap, so thats not a solution).
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Svadhishthana
Posts: 342 | Thanks: 292
Joined: Mon May 31, 2021 5:28 pm
Goal: Be Free
Age: 30
Motto: Climb that goddamned mountain

Sat Jul 01, 2023 3:05 pm

First of all, this would be a good post to put in your progress log.... which you don't seem to have made yet. So you should do that and post most questions you have in there, rather than making a new forum topic for each one.

Second, to answer your question, that depends on your goals. You say your goal is to get laid, so you should be going on every date you can possibly go on, except with women who are obviously unattractive to you. If you are not sure if you are attracted to a woman, or if the conversation will flow, or whatever, then that uncertainty means there is a chance that you *will* want to fuck her, so you should do it.

The exception to this is if these dates are taking up too much time - ie, you are already booked solid with other dates, other social activities, and other self improvement activities, and you are having to move things around to squeeze a girl in who you aren't that excited about. Then, sure, be pickier. But if you are currently going on no dates and spending your free time doing fuck-all, then a date you are uncertain about isn't a waste of time - everything else in your life is a waste of time and going on the date is the only productive thing you could be doing.

As for your libido - you might just be wired different. The solution is to go on even more dates, because you can never judge chemistry over an app anyway, so you'll need to have an additional step in your pipeline where you filter out girls you don't connect with.
Previous goals:
- Retire in early 2022 with combo index funds / real estate. (Complete, late)
- Get fit (hotter, more athletic, more injury-resistant). (Ill defined, but improved)
- Get laid at least one more time before 30th birthday (Complete).
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Crisis_Overcomer
Posts: 1026 | Thanks: 736
Joined: Sat Jul 25, 2020 7:25 pm
Goal: Earn $5,000/month
Age: 33
Motto: Motion beats meditation

Sat Jul 01, 2023 6:47 pm

Svadhishthana wrote:
Sat Jul 01, 2023 3:05 pm
First of all, this would be a good post to put in your progress log
What the gentleman here said. Start a log, ask questions like that there. Locking this
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