Thu Dec 23, 2021 12:18 pm
So yes it was indeed my first post, but my first post should have been this one:
(and that milf post should have been my fourth) So here we go!
1) At the age of 17 I was already 191cm but a mere 60kgs. I found out I had hormonal issues producing minimal testosterone hence why I could not gain muscle no matter how hard I train. At one point I trained twice a day 6 times a week and i ate 4000 calories a day with 240 grams of protein a day and I still could not gain. Started to get body ache and a doctor visit showed me that my liver could not handle all this protein. Long story short, I have a very rare syndrome, affects my testosterone and I can´t have children.
2) After getting on TRT I began to grow hair (I was hairless) and stopped feeling extreme depression after orgasm (klinefelter syndrome google it if you wish, a side effect of the syndrome, not pleasant at all)
3) I started to feel horny finally and I was very socially awkward, after years of being called spaghetti, and having severe acne, I spent 1.5 years on accutane, doses increasing up to 80mg, which I do not recommend as the side effects are truly horrendous. My skin on my hands, pubis, lips, face, some parts of chest, would crack open and bleed. I used about 100grams of vaseline every single day. The joint pains prevented me from lifting some as medium in weight as my school bag, it would cause 10/10 pain in my lower back and I would fall to the ground.
4) I discovered GLL in that period. Since everybody made fun of me, including my mother sadly... Father is just a rock, he was never there physically or mentally. Chris motivated me to get on my first steroid cycle, since I was already on TRT i did not need a PCT and the likes. (yes I small balls, and I had maybe 5-6 girls comment on them, it sucks, but it was after sex)
5) I read, listened and watched 100% of the GLL material. And I could not believe Scotty´s stories. That is when the fire started, on top of that I began feeling testosterone properly for the first time in my life. And I could finally see the light.
6) I dropped out of school, the 3rd school, since I was kicked out of the 2 previously. I went to a french school, english school and danish school, and I speak these 3 languages fluently including Russian. (I´m from Ukraine originally, I lived my life abroad)
7) I started with meeting my first mentor at age 17. Ricardo Vargas (google him) He taught my a good bit about time management and organizing yourself in time blocks. I also discovered the movie the secret at the time and Ricardo also got started like this in his life, so this was proof for me that it is real. I sent out 300 emails to video game companies. Out of which 13 responded. And League of Legends was one of them and it was my favorite at the time. Mark (Tryndamere) answered my email and forwarded me to his personal assistant. What was I offering? 3D printing technology on t shirts (yes at that time nobody was doing it). We got a contract, I produced, I sold, I got an investor for $80,000. It all seemed surreal (I´m actually getting a tear writing this one, because I never shared this with anyone. I was a loner). Long story short, LOL has a unique contract with JINX, that did not allow them to sign a partnership with me until their deal ended in 6 months. What I saw in the coming months made me very sad. All my ideas came to life in this company jinx. I knew this was my ideas. Maybe they used me to test the market. Its ok. I learned that whatever you mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.
8) In this same period I started approaching women, in pretty much the AA fashion. I was rejected 396 in a row. To say that I felt worthless... would be an understatement...But law of attraction is real, remember that. Later that year I met a girl from online, I think the website was called "tagged" back in the day. First date, i remember it so clearly. Because that was my first blowjob as well, or any female interaction for the matter.
We met on Stroget (central street in Denmark), we walked a bit, sat on the bench, she wore a tight yellow dress (she was Nigerian, i always preferred brown skin for as long as I can remember. She sat on my lap, and i literally remember this as a cobra strike, she kissed me first! 1 minute forward she said "I will do whatever you want" and I said "suck my dick". It was October, so rather cold in Denmark, we went behind the church in the center, there was darkness behind there and I finally felt a warm mouth on my penis. Fast forward some minutes, its too cold and I can´t keep a boner. So we found this street toilet where you put in a coin, they are actually very clean. We tried to have sex (she was a virgin too) I could not figure out why it was not going inside lol... fast forward I came i her mouth, she stood up and kissed (after swallowing my cum) Ewwwww. And I lost lost my virginity to her a few weeks later.
9) I continued to approach from the street without any success. It was only when I started to fill out my frame that I began to have success in the street. But I did start to get some dates from online. And that´s how i met my girlfriend, who invited me to live with her at age 18, which was my chance to move out from my parents place.
10) I started Penis Enlargement. Manual stretching and Jelqing, the classic JP90. I started at 17cm BPEL (feeling lucky because the people with my syndrome are known to have a very small penis) I gained around 0.8cm in length and 0 cm in girth in that time. That activated my belief that this is real and it can be done. Fast forward 5 years. I used the sizegenetics for a total of 1412 hours, until my dick hole started bleeding, at once point the stretch was 21.7cm and I stopped for 2 months, Tried again, again bleeding. I thought this must be end. But not too sad. Because I am at 21cm now, and my girth is 0.8cm thicker. Making me 14.8 Mid girth. Head is 14.3cm and base is 16.5cm (yes really probably from bathmate). I used the bathmate for 6 months, but stopped because my small balls would keep getting sucked in and it was excruciating painful when it happened and it happened about half the time.
I am going to restart my bathmate journey when the xtreme arrives again, somewhere next month. I remember at the peak I had a legit after bathmate 16cm hang, since I go commando and i make sure to wear revealing clothes that was when my street success started to happen + the muscles. Because the package was undeniable.
11) I spent 3 years in a relationship with the first girl. Then I married taranehfit (check instagram) for 4 years. So not much time I spent single, but when I did, I fucked alot of girls. Now from my experience especially in marriage with a woman 13 years my senior. I have learned alot, and I have committed to staying single until the one appears. The one would be a girl who is all action and no talk and she has to want me and prove it to me. This is why I decided to start logging.
I learned that I had a subconscious belief that some things in my life a woman had to be to fill out that space. The space when it gets lonely and hard. I learned that I wanted to share my OWN responsibilities because, lazy? maybe. But never the less.
12) While being in the last relationship, I got addicted to weed, and nicotine pretty bad. I understand now that it was because of the lack of emotions I would have received by being single. Meeting new women is extremely exciting for me. Especially the unexpected lays.
13) I promised my father and brother that I will quick smoking, which I did, with the occasional 1-2 cigarette relapse when i get nervous talking to a hottie that is smoking as well. I thought of getting a replica of a cigarette with nothing inside, so I would be basically smoking air. To confuse my body.
14) My skill went down significantly in this period, and I became some pussy I would say. This is why I´m here. This is not me, I am much better than this. And I want you all to keep me accountable.
15) Financially, I have been trading for 7 years, and I am preparing to start the FTMO challenge to receive the $400,000 investment which would be incredible.
16) About personal development, I have read 496 books to date, that is less than one per week in the last 12 years. All personal development of any sort. I have probably read another 50 in school fantasy and stuff, I don´t care to include those.
My current PROBLEM IS: Since quitting smoking I feel a bit strange inside. A bit awkward and insecure at times. I feel afraid to approach at night and groups of girls. I want to work on that.
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2022 Goals(Before July):
- 95kgs shredded
- Consistent Bathmate Sausage
- Get funded by FTMO for $400,000
- Habit of meditation twice daily
female state at its finest, mouth watering
