colgate's training log - mouse to bulldog

The main purpose of this forum; tell us what goals you're working on.
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Jacobpalmer123
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Sun Jan 23, 2022 4:52 pm

Stick with it my man. In time it'll come. You're 140 pounds, 160 you'll feel like an imposing presence. A pound a month is 12 pounds in a year, 1.5 would be 18 pounds and 2 per month is 24. So something to think about. Won't happen right away but in time. And as you get bigger you'll get stronger. Look forward to seeing it all.
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colgate
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Mon Jan 24, 2022 8:44 am

Sunday 01/23
Rest day for gym. Chest, shoulders, and biceps were still sore this morning but fine now.

Calories: 2426
Protein: 80g
Carbs: 192g
Fat: 129g

Now that my mom isn't cooking my meals and I'm not in a place where I can cook, I need to make sure I eat enough food.

--

I've thought about the advice given to me here about "clean bulking" and trying to stay lean but I just want to feel like a freaking tank. Potentially it might make me look far less aesthetic, but despite the acceptable level of muscle and maybe upper end of leanness (17%ish based on @NotYourAverageNerd's analysis) I have, I still feel tiny and mousy, not far off from years ago when I was 125lbs and couldn't do a pullup. I'd rather first get strong and bulky like @Master and then cut.

Just to further explain my issues with eating, every time I swallow food, my gag reflex wants to initiate and I have to tell myself I won't hurl if I swallow. This gets worse as the meal progresses. My mom used to basically shove food down my throat even after I was full as a kid. I'm not saying this to complain or whine, I just want to elucidate some of my problems.

If I got to a point where I felt huge and strong, it would alleviate this huge insecurity. I want to have a large physical presence. I know when I feel closer to this point, I could cut no problem.
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pancakemouse
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Mon Jan 24, 2022 10:02 am

colgate wrote: ↑
Mon Jan 24, 2022 8:44 am
I've thought about the advice given to me here about "clean bulking" and trying to stay lean but I just want to feel like a freaking tank. Potentially it might make me look far less aesthetic, but despite the acceptable level of muscle and maybe upper end of leanness (17%ish based on @NotYourAverageNerd's analysis) I have, I still feel tiny and mousy, not far off from years ago when I was 125lbs and couldn't do a pullup. I'd rather first get strong and bulky like @Master and then cut.

Just to further explain my issues with eating, every time I swallow food, my gag reflex wants to initiate and I have to tell myself I won't hurl if I swallow. This gets worse as the meal progresses. My mom used to basically shove food down my throat even after I was full as a kid. I'm not saying this to complain or whine, I just want to elucidate some of my problems.

If I got to a point where I felt huge and strong, it would alleviate this huge insecurity. I want to have a large physical presence. I know when I feel closer to this point, I could cut no problem.
This doesn't really make sense biology-speaking, though.

I'm pretty sure research has shown that you only need a surplus of a couple hundred calories a day for optimal muscle gain.
The amount of muscle you can gain per unit of time is determined almost entirely by your genetics, which means that every extra calorie you're eating beyond your genetic limit is just going to go to fat stores. Why intentionally gain fat and then have to waste future time burning it off later?

I think I posted this before in someone else's log:


The genetics pill is a tough one to swallow. I remember the first few years of lifting, I was convinced that I was going to look like a god, and I would constantly compare myself to someone else. But the more I read about how much genetics are a factor, the more I've realized that I'm just a typical "hard gainer" with a lot of slow twitch muscle fibers (I was a cross country runner in high school). As a naturally skinny and lean guy, I'm guessing you have similar genetics to me. Obviously, don't let this dissuade you from training, but I think it's important to have realistic goals.
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colgate
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Mon Jan 24, 2022 10:37 am

pancakemouse wrote: ↑
Mon Jan 24, 2022 10:02 am
Why intentionally gain fat and then have to waste future time burning it off later?
pancakemouse wrote: ↑
Mon Jan 24, 2022 10:02 am
But the more I read about how much genetics are a factor, the more I've realized that I'm just a typical "hard gainer" with a lot of slow twitch muscle fibers (I was a cross country runner in high school). As a naturally skinny and lean guy, I'm guessing you have similar genetics to me.
I don't think I've seriously bulked + worked out for a consistent and long enough period of time to know that I'm a "hard-gainer", nor do I know how many calories is excess and being stored as extra fat. The main "hard-gainer" aspect for me is that I literally can't keep up with a bulk diet. I'm perfectly happy eating 1500 calories a day and maybe an occasional binge.

For context, from January 2019-June 2019, I did stronglifts 5x5 from never lifting a weight in my life at 128lbs skinnyfat to around 145lbs. I gained up to 140lbs within 2 months and then the next 3-4 were slow. But I went from the barbell to 255/135/335 squat/bench/deadlift for 1 rep. I never really tracked my calories though and spent some days not eating much and other days literally 3+ hours trying to eat a single meal. I started brickwalling too because I was too focused on my stats and lost motivation to stay consistent. Likely the brickwall was from not eating enough.

Then I got a brief neck injury squatting 240 for 5 one day, and pretty much quit lifting. I switched to rock climbing 1-3x a week with friends and went from 145lbs to 137lbs. In that time, I also went from 7ish pullups to 15.

Pandemic hit and I started doing calisthenics at home. Didn't track what I ate again, but went from 15 to 26 pullups over 2 months. Maybe 137lbs to 140lbs.

Then I moved to Tennessee and didn't do jack shit for 6 months. Stayed at 140 but I think I was losing muscle and gaining fat.

Housemate was doing keto so I decided to do it for the lolz over 4 months. I actually enjoyed it somehow. Went from 140lbs to really cut at 128. I was also running 3-4 miles in the mountains everyday and eventually was biking 15-20 miles 3x a week up and down lots of hills. I was like damn. But one day I went whitewater rafting and some big guy brushed me aside to help pull up people from the water like "let me have some room to pull up people because I have more strength" This unleashed a huge insecurity in me and I realized it didn't matter how much my abs were popping and how defined I looked, I am tiny. So I quit keto and hit the gym again. I think when I joined the forums I was at 137lbs again.

Leading into my move to Nashville, I was pretty regular with the gym (you can see my old logs). I had a simple diet that allowed me to eat around 3000 calories a day. I managed to get my max bench from 135 to 185 over a few months (after also fixing my technique). Right when I left Nashville, I peaked around 147 lbs.

Then for some reason, when I moved to Austin I didn't go to the gym. By the time I started half-assing it again, I'd already dipped to 140. I specifically remember visiting Austin in October and doing 17 pullups but then it declined to like 12.

I don't really have a specific weight and time goal anymore because I don't know my body well enough to know what's realistic. But I haven't seriously put in lifting effort for a sustained period of time since I did stronglifts in college. I do know whatever I was doing in Aug-Oct was likely on the right track because I felt I was gaining a good amount of mass and strength. So I want to put that to the test and see what happens.

EDIT: Also based on the feedback I'd received here, I lowered my goal to 2500+. My BMR is 1900-2100 depending on how much I'm walking around approaching and working out so I think 400+ is a reasonable surplus.
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colgate
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Mon Jan 24, 2022 10:30 pm

I was talking a walk this morning and thinking about what I wanted to feel like. I want to be a fierce and husky bulldog. So that's my new spirit animal. I started as a mouse and maybe I'm a cat now, but I'll become a bulldog.

Monday 01/24
Bench Press - 115x12/115x12/115x7/95x8
Incline DB Press - 30x18/30x12/30x12
Overhead Press - 60x13/60x10/60x8
Chest Fly - 20x12/20x12/20x9
Skullcrusher - 15x12/15x8/12.5x8
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colgate
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Tue Jan 25, 2022 8:56 am

I probably ate close to 3000 calories today thanks to stumbling upon the best restaurant I've been to in my life.

https://goo.gl/maps/qu2FxiaAaj7PpSZg9

The picture doesn't show you jack shit about what you're about to get into if you go here.

The windows are all painted black and I walk in at around 11pm. Immediately there's rainbow lights everywhere. Bunch of people doing karaoke. I see this random guy in the corner escalating on a waitress. WTF??? Like fondling her thighs and shit. She comes over to take my order and I order a $25 plate of beef noodles. They're playing dance music that Shazam can't pick up. I ask the waitress what the song is and she just says "it's Vietnamese music". I'll never hear this music again.

I get the noodles and it's a huge serving. Maybe for 2-3 people at least, I would say at least 1200 calories but no idea. It's literally one of the best meals I've had in my life. I scarf the whole thing down in like 20 minutes. Meanwhile, the waitress is going around to a couple of other guys and they're getting a little handsy with her. And then she goes back to the first guy and they kiss for a little bit.

I was feeling like I just walked into a Vietnamese exclave in California. I'm in a place worth living for. This is what I want my life to be.

Of course they only took cash. Walking out of there felt like walking out of a dream.
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MakingAComeback
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Tue Jan 25, 2022 10:22 am

Keep working brown man

MAC
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colgate
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Wed Jan 26, 2022 4:23 am

Tuesday 01/25
Pullups: 16/7/5
DB Rows: 45x14/45x12/45x12
Upright Rows: 60x12/60x12/60x12 (harder than last time somehow)
Curls: 50x12/50x12/50x10
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colgate
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Sat Jan 29, 2022 11:11 am

Going to try logging food instead of calories. I pretty much have to exclusively eat out because I've been living like a nomad, and I have no idea how to estimate the calories for many of the things I eat.

Tuesday 01/25
Calories: 2660
Protein: 177g
Carbs: 240g
Fat: 111g

Wednesday 01/26
Rest day.

Chocolate Milk 14 fl oz
10" Buffalo Chicken Pizza, Squirt soda can
Super Chile Relleno Burrito

Thursday 01/27
Absolutely terrible time management and I skipped gym. And definitely did not eat enough (likely since I skipped gym).

Garlic Blue Cheese Burger, Fries, Hard Cider

Friday 01/28
Bench Press - 115x12/115x12/115x6/95x8
Incline DB Press - 35x14/35x8/35x12
Overhead Press - 60x12/60x9/60x8
Chest Fly - 20x12/20x12/20x15
Skullcrusher - 15x12/15x12/15x10

25g protein drink
Large Poke Bowl with ~3 cups of rice
Chile Relleno Burrito with chorizo, 3/4 finished
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colgate
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Thu Feb 10, 2022 11:06 pm

OK, sorry for the long hiatus.

I did a couple workouts I didn't log but then I dropped out for another week. This has already happened before since I've created this log.

As I said on my main log, I quit vaping and fapping which has motivated me to get my shit in order. That's still a WIP, but I knew if I just started working out again, I'd quit again within a few weeks and spin my wheels.

So I've signed up for a personal trainer, and we just had our first session this morning. The personal trainer is mainly to keep me consistent (literally paying someone to make me do something I don't want to do lmfao), but also just to guide me while I'm doing my reps and do my programming. Also he's going to keep me accountable for my nutrition.

I've committed to 12 weeks of personal training, so we'll see where that leads me. In the meanwhile, I'll be updating this log again.

Squat
75x8/75x8/75x8

Incline DB Press -> Pushups -> DB Rows -> Slow Pullups
(35x10 -> 15 -> 40x10 -> 5)/(35x10 -> 15 -> 40x10 -> 3)

Gunshows
10x7 low/5 sec hold/10x7 mid/5 sec hold/10x7 full
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Sprezza
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Thu Feb 10, 2022 11:23 pm

colgate wrote: ↑
Thu Feb 10, 2022 11:06 pm
So I've signed up for a personal trainer, and we just had our first session this morning. The personal trainer is mainly to keep me consistent (literally paying someone to make me do something I don't want to do lmfao), but also just to guide me while I'm doing my reps and do my programming. Also he's going to keep me accountable for my nutrition.

I've committed to 12 weeks of personal training, so we'll see where that leads me. In the meanwhile, I'll be updating this log again.
Great step! A lot of people underestimate a good PT and think its a waste of money while it can actually get you into a good habit of working out/dieting and ALSO saving you lots of trial and erroring (basically rookie mistakes). Keep at it bro!
Main Goals 2021
A1 BUSINESS
----Have an online independent business netting me 5000$ in total for 2022
A2 RANDOM
----Allow myself to have time for hobbies such as learning a new language, reading/listening to something interesting (0/12 months)
----Get the fuck out of Sweden during bad months (Oct-April)

Sprezza's log
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colgate
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Fri Feb 18, 2022 3:43 pm

NotYourAverageNerd wrote: ↑
Fri Dec 31, 2021 10:54 pm
but yeah, I'd still say over 15%, probably closer to 17%. Keep in mind people almost always under-estimate their bodyfat %
You were right.

I did a body scan with my personal trainer on Wednesday. I'm 141.8 lbs at 18% body fat. So, long way to go.

Mainly just did a bunch of exercises addressing some of my imbalances between left and right, and some glute activation exercises.

Will be going to gym again on Sat, Mon, and Wed.
πŸ’πŸ½β€β™‚οΈπŸΆ
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1v1mekid
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Fri Feb 18, 2022 6:44 pm

pancakemouse wrote: ↑
Mon Jan 24, 2022 10:02 am
I'm pretty sure research has shown that you only need a surplus of a couple hundred calories a day for optimal muscle gain.
The amount of muscle you can gain per unit of time is determined almost entirely by your genetics, which means that every extra calorie you're eating beyond your genetic limit is just going to go to fat stores. Why intentionally gain fat and then have to waste future time burning it off later?

I think I posted this before in someone else's log:


The genetics pill is a tough one to swallow. I remember the first few years of lifting, I was convinced that I was going to look like a god, and I would constantly compare myself to someone else. But the more I read about how much genetics are a factor, the more I've realized that I'm just a typical "hard gainer" with a lot of slow twitch muscle fibers (I was a cross country runner in high school). As a naturally skinny and lean guy, I'm guessing you have similar genetics to me. Obviously, don't let this dissuade you from training, but I think it's important to have realistic goals.
Ditto. I remember in high school, I would work out so hard, eat so much protein etc. Some of my friends would barely touch a barbell and they were still stronger than me. I remember one friend in particular was genetically gifted, he was able to hit 420lbs on bench press. My peak was 280lbs, which is still respectable, but it took me twice as long to achieve. This is assuming none were juicing, I don't think they did.. but then again you can't know.
2022 Goals:
1 new lay by dec-31 βœ”οΈ
$90k/year by dec-31βœ”οΈ
move out βœ”οΈ
lose 15lbs βœ”οΈ
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NotYourAverageNerd
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Location: South Bay (LA)

Fri Feb 18, 2022 11:31 pm

PT's a really good idea, accountability (and paying for every second with them πŸ™ƒ) is a great way to make sure you keep up the work ethic

I'll say one thing for size/presence you were talking about is that it may end up being MUCH more of an EXternal thing than an INternal one, than you might expect.
I went from being guessed at 5'8" and 135lb by someone else when I was actually 5'10" and 165 (so, TINY presence even with an average body) to being the BIGGEST (muscle-wise, still only 5'10") guy in my social groups. ~185 and still fairly lean, with a huge presence. Just a couple weeks I got hired as a bouncer purely on being "big". (if you want some pictures for reference I just posted some comparisons in my log). I've been guessed at 6'1" and over 200lbs more recently.

That's a HUGE range of external change.

Thing is I don't feel ANY different inside.

It does buy a little "leeway", but it's REALLY not a big difference. I'm only about as dominant or sociable or "alpha" or whatever as when I was 20 or 30 pounds lighter, it's mainly down to mindset after the first 30 seconds. Used to know a guy who was even more of a beast than Master (probably 17" arms) BUT was a total "nice guy", could get out-alpha'd by a poodle. Took about 30 seconds to realize it once you met him. Other guy is 5'0" and absolutely dominates any interaction he's in. Also takes about 30 seconds to realize it. After that, their size has WAY less effect than you'd think
JUST FUCKING DO IT
Current goal:
-Make some close friends
-Get into the party/"promotion" scene


Past goals:
-Deal with self-condemnation: sort of? Not really gone but it's not the overwhelming force it used to be
-Sex with at least 1 new girl per month (2/21 to 12/21) - Completed 6 out of 11
-Pre-pandemic bench, deadlift by 02 / 15 / 21 - Completed 2/15/21
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colgate
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Mon Feb 21, 2022 3:53 am

Since I'm doing PT now, this log will be used more for documenting the experience of having a personal trainer. I figured it should be useful for guys who are deciding whether they should get a personal trainer or just work out solo.

Had another training sesh with my PT on Saturday morning.

As I said in my last post here, he had pointed out imbalances with my left and right sides. Mainly that my right arm is absolutely inflexible, and correspondingly (didn't know this) my left leg is also inflexible.

He then told me about the psoas muscle connecting the femur to the back and had me do a bunch of stretches to really feel it, in addition to a bunch of glute activation exercises.

I'll post them in this log later. But I mention all this because one reason I was initially skipping leg day when I made this log is because I always thought my squat form was atrocious. I could never get to depth without having a massive butt wink, despite deloading and reloading several times over the years. I would essentially get to a certain weight, deload about 40%, manage to correct my form, and then the problem would arise again. It was so frustrating and I couldn't figure out what the problem was despite watching many YouTube videos and asking some friends that I gave up.

My PT highlighted that my squat was butt winking because:
1. I wasn't properly activating my glutes throughout the squat
2. My left leg is horribly inflexible. This was highlighted when he had me do lunges, and the left lunge was noticeably worse.

After some exercises and stretches, I had noticed the butt wink had reduced a little bit. Not completely, but it was getting better, especially when I really paid attention to keeping my glutes activated throughout the squat.

My initial goal with PT was mainly accountability and consistency, and that will definitely happen, but it seems like I'm straight up getting so many questions and concerns that I wasn't even aware of answered. And many of these concerns were reasons why I couldn't stay consistent in the gym, I could never figure out what I was doing wrong.
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