Yg’s Progress Log - Social Circle Advice

The main purpose of this forum; tell us what goals you're working on.
User avatar
Yggdrasil13
Posts: 55 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2023 10:37 pm
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 27
Motto: Do or Die

Thu Mar 30, 2023 12:43 am

Squilliam wrote:
Wed Mar 29, 2023 7:07 pm
Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Wed Mar 29, 2023 12:19 am
So what’s the game plan to bang a girl who comes back to your place? Now I’m getting make outs that go nowhere.

Edit: had a thought that maybe I am pushing things too fast? There’s a lot more sexual tension on the dates now, but it’s mostly talk with a little bit of touch thrown in, I move to making out pretty quickly when we get back to my place and I’m not getting that much passion back…
I'm having the same issue. I've had a lot of pulls that resulted in making out but she usually doesn't let me go further.

I also noticed the same thing with regards to passion. But honestly, this isn't necessarily a sign of disinterest. I don't think it's reasonable to expect a girl to be crazy horny & obsessed with you at the end of a first date. Or maybe that's just the case at my SMV level. In my experience, that has only happened with mentally unstable girls, or girls that were very desperate and/or far below me in SMV.

I think women generally tend to display less visible signs of arousal, and they generally aren't as turned on by visual stimuli as we are. Just because a girl isn't moaning super loud, or showing lots of physical arousal signs, does not necessarily indicate that she isn't into you. I know what you mean though. I know how it feels to kiss and feel each other up when you're actually both into each other, and to feel that tightness and aggressiveness is just so hot. But I've accepted that not all women are like this. Some women are loud and aggressive, others are quiet and passive in bed. Some are in between.
I reflected on it and I think I moved too fast with her and I needed to give her a little more time to get comfortable. In retrospect the 3 girls who stopped me were all a little uncomfortable. If a girl isn’t into making out with me next time I’m going to take that as a sign to stop and try and build more comfort/sexual tension. It’s not even like I was enjoying it lol.

The 1 cute girl I banged first date off OLD was actually my first date ever off the apps and I moved really slowly back at my place bc I was so nervous, like 1/2 hour to kiss her, maybe more. That might actually have worked in my favor.

It’s just a theory, but it kind of makes sense the more of a nice guy you seem like on dates the slower you have to move back at your place. I will report back with results for posterity.
User avatar
Crisis_Overcomer
Posts: 1017 | Thanks: 720
Joined: Sat Jul 25, 2020 7:25 pm
Goal: Earn $5,000/month
Age: 33
Motto: Motion beats meditation

Thu Mar 30, 2023 3:43 pm

Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Wed Mar 29, 2023 12:19 am
I noticed none of them kissed me back that passionately, so idk what that means beyond the obvious (they’re not that turned on)
Um, it's not that big of a problem, to be honest. Sex is not a Hollywood movie where everything is structured to look passionate. Kissing with a girl might be lame while sex might be amazing. Don't confuse the two and don't beat yourself over it.

I'd also not waste time making out... especially if you're both at your place. No point kissing for more than 10 seconds without also getting undressed or somehow moving towards sex.
User avatar
MILFandCookies
Posts: 1207 | Thanks: 588
Joined: Wed Sep 16, 2020 12:29 am
Name: Joe
Goal: $10k+/month
Age: 31
Motto: Unchain your Passion & Live Life on Your Own Terms
Location: Austin, TX/World
Contact:

Thu Mar 30, 2023 8:19 pm

Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Thu Mar 30, 2023 12:43 am
Squilliam wrote:
Wed Mar 29, 2023 7:07 pm

I'm having the same issue. I've had a lot of pulls that resulted in making out but she usually doesn't let me go further.

I also noticed the same thing with regards to passion. But honestly, this isn't necessarily a sign of disinterest. I don't think it's reasonable to expect a girl to be crazy horny & obsessed with you at the end of a first date. Or maybe that's just the case at my SMV level. In my experience, that has only happened with mentally unstable girls, or girls that were very desperate and/or far below me in SMV.

I think women generally tend to display less visible signs of arousal, and they generally aren't as turned on by visual stimuli as we are. Just because a girl isn't moaning super loud, or showing lots of physical arousal signs, does not necessarily indicate that she isn't into you. I know what you mean though. I know how it feels to kiss and feel each other up when you're actually both into each other, and to feel that tightness and aggressiveness is just so hot. But I've accepted that not all women are like this. Some women are loud and aggressive, others are quiet and passive in bed. Some are in between.
I reflected on it and I think I moved too fast with her and I needed to give her a little more time to get comfortable. In retrospect the 3 girls who stopped me were all a little uncomfortable. If a girl isn’t into making out with me next time I’m going to take that as a sign to stop and try and build more comfort/sexual tension. It’s not even like I was enjoying it lol.

The 1 cute girl I banged first date off OLD was actually my first date ever off the apps and I moved really slowly back at my place bc I was so nervous, like 1/2 hour to kiss her, maybe more. That might actually have worked in my favor.

It’s just a theory, but it kind of makes sense the more of a nice guy you seem like on dates the slower you have to move back at your place. I will report back with results for posterity.
More space won't always make a girl more comfortable, or ready to fuck you. In fact, often it's not what she needs.

For a girl to fuck you, she needs to be attracted and comfortable. The more attracted she is, the less comfortable she needs to be. Imagine a girl super horned up and just ready to jump some guy's bones.

On the other hand, the more comfortable she is the MORE attracted she needs to be, because otherwise it's super "friend" vibes and not enough sexual tension.

So I'd focus more on being attractive (looks (fasion, physique, grooming), in person vibe etc.)

That said, most girls need some level of comfort to get nakey with you.

I find empanthy, being able to really feel a girl's state, is the highest bang for buck with getting girls comfortable. Almost like a dance... if you have ever done latin dancing, or even if not you can visualize this - if you're leading a girl and you can feel her well, you can imagine moving with her a lot more smoothly, and getting her to move with you. But if you can't feel her, then you can imagine leading her into a dance will be very awkward, you'll be off beat, stepping on each other's toes etc.

So after you focus on looks, I'd focus on empathy and really feeling into her during dates. It's an abstract suggestion, if you find it's not actionable enough let me know and I'll think of a way to make it more actionable.
I've helped > 100 guys get laid on dating apps.
📸🔥 Dating App Photographer - I'll get you laid, click here: https://www.DatingUnchained.com/ 🔥📸

P.S. I don't like MILFs, just the name ;)

Goal 1:
• Build + maintain $10k+ profit/month

Goal 2:
• Cut some fat to get abs again
User avatar
Yggdrasil13
Posts: 55 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2023 10:37 pm
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 27
Motto: Do or Die

Fri Mar 31, 2023 5:20 pm

MILFandCookies wrote:
Thu Mar 30, 2023 8:19 pm
Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Thu Mar 30, 2023 12:43 am


I reflected on it and I think I moved too fast with her and I needed to give her a little more time to get comfortable. In retrospect the 3 girls who stopped me were all a little uncomfortable. If a girl isn’t into making out with me next time I’m going to take that as a sign to stop and try and build more comfort/sexual tension. It’s not even like I was enjoying it lol.

The 1 cute girl I banged first date off OLD was actually my first date ever off the apps and I moved really slowly back at my place bc I was so nervous, like 1/2 hour to kiss her, maybe more. That might actually have worked in my favor.

It’s just a theory, but it kind of makes sense the more of a nice guy you seem like on dates the slower you have to move back at your place. I will report back with results for posterity.
More space won't always make a girl more comfortable, or ready to fuck you. In fact, often it's not what she needs.

For a girl to fuck you, she needs to be attracted and comfortable. The more attracted she is, the less comfortable she needs to be. Imagine a girl super horned up and just ready to jump some guy's bones.

On the other hand, the more comfortable she is the MORE attracted she needs to be, because otherwise it's super "friend" vibes and not enough sexual tension.

So I'd focus more on being attractive (looks (fasion, physique, grooming), in person vibe etc.)

That said, most girls need some level of comfort to get nakey with you.

I find empanthy, being able to really feel a girl's state, is the highest bang for buck with getting girls comfortable. Almost like a dance... if you have ever done latin dancing, or even if not you can visualize this - if you're leading a girl and you can feel her well, you can imagine moving with her a lot more smoothly, and getting her to move with you. But if you can't feel her, then you can imagine leading her into a dance will be very awkward, you'll be off beat, stepping on each other's toes etc.

So after you focus on looks, I'd focus on empathy and really feeling into her during dates. It's an abstract suggestion, if you find it's not actionable enough let me know and I'll think of a way to make it more actionable.
I already think my looks are pretty good tbh. I already made a lot of improvements when I was working on building my profile. Only area there’s a lot of room for improvement is my physique but I’d still say it’s above average and I am pretty lean. I am working as hard as I can on adding more muscle mass and am hopefully a year or two away from having a really good body. In-person vibe probably has significant room for improvement too, but it definitely is improving.

The empathy stuff makes sense. To me, that just means paying more attention to her, how she’s feeling, and how quickly/slowly she needs things to move after we’re back at my place. I think I started going on autopilot after I had some initial success and viewed it as a done deal after we got back to my place. Which evidently it is not lol. Most guys tend to err on the side of not being aggressive enough but I think I was too aggressive. I’ll experiment with this and see if it makes a difference.
User avatar
Yggdrasil13
Posts: 55 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2023 10:37 pm
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 27
Motto: Do or Die

Fri Mar 31, 2023 5:25 pm

Crisis_Overcomer wrote:
Thu Mar 30, 2023 3:43 pm
Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Wed Mar 29, 2023 12:19 am
I noticed none of them kissed me back that passionately, so idk what that means beyond the obvious (they’re not that turned on)
Um, it's not that big of a problem, to be honest. Sex is not a Hollywood movie where everything is structured to look passionate. Kissing with a girl might be lame while sex might be amazing. Don't confuse the two and don't beat yourself over it.

I'd also not waste time making out... especially if you're both at your place. No point kissing for more than 10 seconds without also getting undressed or somehow moving towards sex.
Yeah we made out for like 10 minutes then she left lol.
I tried to pull her on top of me to straddle me, but she wouldn’t comply. I also tried to push her to lie down but she wasn’t having that either. I didn’t try and take her clothes off… I’ll keep this in mind, it did seem like she resisted my attempts to escalate though.
User avatar
Yggdrasil13
Posts: 55 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2023 10:37 pm
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 27
Motto: Do or Die

Sun Apr 02, 2023 7:17 pm

jakeD wrote:
Sat Apr 01, 2023 6:11 am
It's kinda hard to say without seeing this in person.

I will say though that escalation is more than just physical moves. Any guy can make physical moves. But the energy and vibe with it matters.

I'm thinking there just isn't enough edge to you / your sexuality is the best I could come up with either that or you're really just running into alot of girls that just aren't very down and need to run more numbers game.
Yeah, I’m still pretty inexperienced so I’m just gonna experiment and see what happens for now.
User avatar
Yggdrasil13
Posts: 55 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2023 10:37 pm
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 27
Motto: Do or Die

Sun Apr 02, 2023 7:22 pm

Haven’t been on any more dates, have one lined up tonight though.

As an aside, could I get a Hail Mary recommendation on this conversation?
imageedit_8_7568053117.jpeg
Honestly not my best texting but she didn’t give me much to work with. My second line is referencing one of her prompts. Sent the last message about 24 hours ago. Feel like I was too boring, plus her location is in her profile. Ordinarily I would just leave it but this girl is extremely attractive so I want to give it one more shot. Probably would wait til tomorrow night to message again. Any advice?
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
User avatar
pancakemouse
Posts: 1769 | Thanks: 1053
Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2021 4:14 pm
Goal: Master cold approach
Age: 33

Sun Apr 02, 2023 7:31 pm

Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Sun Apr 02, 2023 7:22 pm
Haven’t been on any more dates, have one lined up tonight though.

As an aside, could I get a Hail Mary recommendation on this conversation?

imageedit_8_7568053117.jpeg

Honestly not my best texting but she didn’t give me much to work with. My second line is referencing one of her prompts. Sent the last message about 24 hours ago. Feel like I was too boring, plus her location is in her profile. Ordinarily I would just leave it but this girl is extremely attractive so I want to give it one more shot. Probably would wait til tomorrow night to message again. Any advice?
For hail marys, I like to play off something the girl said and playfully insinuate she got lost or died doing it. Like "damn guess you got stuck in child's pose :crying emoji:". Obviously don't send this, but you get the picture.
User avatar
Yggdrasil13
Posts: 55 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2023 10:37 pm
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 27
Motto: Do or Die

Sun Apr 02, 2023 7:50 pm

pancakemouse wrote:
Sun Apr 02, 2023 7:31 pm
Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Sun Apr 02, 2023 7:22 pm
Haven’t been on any more dates, have one lined up tonight though.

As an aside, could I get a Hail Mary recommendation on this conversation?

imageedit_8_7568053117.jpeg

Honestly not my best texting but she didn’t give me much to work with. My second line is referencing one of her prompts. Sent the last message about 24 hours ago. Feel like I was too boring, plus her location is in her profile. Ordinarily I would just leave it but this girl is extremely attractive so I want to give it one more shot. Probably would wait til tomorrow night to message again. Any advice?
For hail marys, I like to play off something the girl said and playfully insinuate she got lost or died doing it. Like "damn guess you got stuck in child's pose :crying emoji:". Obviously don't send this, but you get the picture.
Hmmm how about:

"Damn, hope you didn't wrapped up in a bar fight, don't be a hero. :some kind of emoji:"

Also was there anything wrong with how I messaged her? I felt like maybe it was too boring but there wasn't a ton to work with.
kratjeuh
Posts: 740 | Thanks: 341
Joined: Sun Aug 21, 2022 8:18 pm
Goal: ...lskd
Age: 94

Sun Apr 02, 2023 8:53 pm

Your first message sets 90% of the tone of the conversation (Except Bumble because girls open). I've noticed if you can't really vibe instantly, it's very difficult to turn it around.

There are exceptions like when a girl is testing you by giving short answers to start, but as a rule of thumb you need to try to make that first one pop. You'll get better at it as you go on. If you follow simple templates, just accept that you'll lose a big chunk of girls in return for time saved. (But if you start to know how to text, it's not much time lost tbh)
User avatar
Yggdrasil13
Posts: 55 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2023 10:37 pm
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 27
Motto: Do or Die

Sun Apr 02, 2023 8:57 pm

kratjeuh wrote:
Sun Apr 02, 2023 8:53 pm
Your first message sets 90% of the tone of the conversation (Except Bumble because girls open). I've noticed if you can't really vibe instantly, it's very difficult to turn it around.

There are exceptions like when a girl is testing you by giving short answers to start, but as a rule of thumb you need to try to make that first one pop. You'll get better at it as you go on. If you follow simple templates, just accept that you'll lose a big chunk of girls in return for time saved. (But if you start to know how to text, it's not much time lost tbh)
Yeah, I was starting to come to that conclusion tbh. I think I’m gonna start opening on their prompts. How many messages do you usually exchange before asking them out?
kratjeuh
Posts: 740 | Thanks: 341
Joined: Sun Aug 21, 2022 8:18 pm
Goal: ...lskd
Age: 94

Sun Apr 02, 2023 9:17 pm

I don't follow any routine or template anymore. Some girls I just 3 messages, some I have about 20. If you really want, I can post some examples here tomorrow
User avatar
MILFandCookies
Posts: 1207 | Thanks: 588
Joined: Wed Sep 16, 2020 12:29 am
Name: Joe
Goal: $10k+/month
Age: 31
Motto: Unchain your Passion & Live Life on Your Own Terms
Location: Austin, TX/World
Contact:

Sun Apr 02, 2023 11:23 pm

Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Sun Apr 02, 2023 7:22 pm
Haven’t been on any more dates, have one lined up tonight though.

As an aside, could I get a Hail Mary recommendation on this conversation?

imageedit_8_7568053117.jpeg

Honestly not my best texting but she didn’t give me much to work with. My second line is referencing one of her prompts. Sent the last message about 24 hours ago. Feel like I was too boring, plus her location is in her profile. Ordinarily I would just leave it but this girl is extremely attractive so I want to give it one more shot. Probably would wait til tomorrow night to message again. Any advice?
No need for a hail mary yet... girls get busy a lot, get tons of matches that bury your conversation, etc. She might even like you, there's almost no info here. She hasn't ghosted you yet... I count not replying to 2 messages in a row (with a few days in between) as ghosting... then you'd use a hail mary if you want.

I'd follow up... something like "Hey looks like you're busy... I'm not on this app much either. What's your number? Let's grab a bubble tea and see what kind of chemistry we have in person."
I've helped > 100 guys get laid on dating apps.
📸🔥 Dating App Photographer - I'll get you laid, click here: https://www.DatingUnchained.com/ 🔥📸

P.S. I don't like MILFs, just the name ;)

Goal 1:
• Build + maintain $10k+ profit/month

Goal 2:
• Cut some fat to get abs again
User avatar
Yggdrasil13
Posts: 55 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2023 10:37 pm
Goal: Get Laid
Age: 27
Motto: Do or Die

Fri Jul 21, 2023 6:09 pm

Well that match didn’t go anywhere, but the advice I got about building sexual tension worked, I went on other dates, banged a few girls and wound up getting a girlfriend so I haven’t posted in a while.

The tips made such a difference that I wanted to ask for other advice. Specifically, how do you be well liked and make friends in groups of people? I feel like I never know what to do in these situations and I want to grow my social circle and be more popular. It doesn’t really come naturally to me, but I’m hoping to learn. So basically, how to be well liked and make friends in groups (3+) of people is the question. Right now, I pretty much just try and make jokes and talk to people, but sometimes I get stuck talking to someone 1 on 1 and feel like they want to talk to the rest of the group. Thanks for any advice.
User avatar
pancakemouse
Posts: 1769 | Thanks: 1053
Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2021 4:14 pm
Goal: Master cold approach
Age: 33

Fri Jul 21, 2023 8:35 pm

Yggdrasil13 wrote:
Fri Jul 21, 2023 6:09 pm
Specifically, how do you be well liked and make friends in groups of people?
Might as well ask "how to become rich" or "how to become attractive to women". This isn't something that can be explained in a forum post. It's a wide-ranging topic and your question is too generic. Give us specific examples, in context, and we'll give you feedback to implement and learn from. Rinse and repeat.
Post Reply