Lusty's 5'4 fat to fit looking for love log

[Lusty69]

100.4kg and the first time my scales as came up with a BF% in the 30's it was 39.9% but fuck that is a win, finally getting out of the severely obese zone and into Obease, next stop just overweight.

Took the day off from Gym yesterday and went for a walk with my mate in the morning, my legs got a little dead seeing the night before I did a 2.5hr walk but it has paid off with the continuing rapid weight loss.

Tomorrow I am going to ease back into doing some work so I will see how I go with capacity around all the exercise as in Gym + 2-3hr walk but I could always just shorten the walk a little.

I do need to start editing videos and getting them rocking I have not posted since before Xmas and I want to keep the momentum on my socials going and keep putting content out there learning what works and who knows might get a viral video going I can learn from to then generate more content like that.

I do have a date this arvo, little nervous on this one as we are very aligned with a lot of self-improvement stuff and she is very attractive, there are parts of me coming up going why did she pick me I am nothing special, I met her online surely there are all these other better-looking dudes hitting her up. Either way I think we connected well, she mentioned that she finds it hard to find people who are actively working on themselves like I was from our chats and is super excited to meet me and I added in a few flirty things with hints of D/s roles in the texts so I think I just need to relax, the bonus is I am over 8kg down which has given me a boost in my looks confidence.

I must say I am excited for the future for once and don't feel like things are such a burden, I finally deeply feel that I will stick to this and lose this weight.

What ever the combination of events were leading up to this point, but since I have gone carnivore I just feel so much better mentally and physically it is crazy, I am finally starting to feel more like my old self again during the years I felt the best with out needing all the external validation, I think the years of my 20's I felt the best was when I had lost a lot of weight, was going out and talking to a lot of women and getting laid a bunch. Right now I feel great and I have this sense of all that is coming to me along with some other great stuff, but I don't feel like its something fully dependant on getting laid, it feels more deep and internal, the love for losing weight isn't only to get laid, sure its a good motivation but I am starting to actually feel more into doing this for my health and how I feel physically in terms of my joints and how I move vs in the past I know I would say this to try tie my weight loss to it, but I think I just hated myself so much I couldn't give a fuck outside of how it impacted my ability to get laid.

[Ryval]

finally getting out of the severely obese zone and into Obease,

Congrats man, great milestone!

[Lusty69]

As @Adrizzle called me I think I have turned into a sniper.

Took 6 months or something like that off dating, easing back in slowly and somehow managed to go on two dates and sleep with both of them on the same night, and both were taller than me, the one tonight only slightly like 1-2" taller.

Little bigger than her photos but had a gorgeous face that looked like a Disney movie character, had lots of fun and good chats with her about stuff leading up.

I guess my next focus is to start doing more in-person stuff, don't think I will do bars and clubs as I like my 10pm bed time, but might start doing some daygame. I just think the next focus will be choosing women I like more, the girl tonight her photos were great but yeah just a touch bigger and older than I want to be with, but I also know this will shift and stuff as I lose weight too and easier to screen that if I do more in person game.

Either way was great fun, had a really enjoyable night and time which is what matters right.

It's just crazy for me to think I took x time off dating, it will take me ages to build momentum and stuff, yes I am on way fewer apps, and running less volume but 2 great women both were older and taller but like I just got back into things am fat and short and still pulling women. I think just the perspective and reinforcement of I am nothing special and I want anyone on here who is complaining about not getting women you really need to look at yourself or maybe move city but I think it's more so you need to look beyond just blaming your looks

Remember I am 5'4 (really 5'3.6) and 100lb overweight using online dating without professional or great photos just headshots to not show my fat body and shortness and every single women I have gone on a date with I slept with.
Sure its a lucky streak and I expect it to end but still in perspective so many dudes on here are taller, leaner, better looking and complain about not getting laid.

Sure I did a lot of work on my social skills, I have life experience, I have done a lot of trauma healing and deep inner work, worked with and been through shit with my closest friend who is a men's sexual education coach. Maybe time to not hyper-focus on looks and become a more well-rounded man, otherwise I can't explain how I get many more fun experiences than many people I hear struggling, sure I have things to improve, but if your goal is simply to get laid, lose your virginity it's not that fucking hard!

I think I will keep going slow with the dating stuff though, I am liking the slower pace, might speed up as I get new photos and lose some weight on the online side, but I do want to push myself to get out of the house more.

[kratjeuh]

Remember I am 5'4 (really 5'3.6) and 100lb overweight using online dating without professional or great photos just headshots to not show my fat body and shortness and every single women I have gone on a date with I slept with.
Sure its a lucky streak and I expect it to end but still in perspective so many dudes on here are taller, leaner, better looking and complain about not getting laid.

but if your goal is simply to get laid, lose your virginity it's not that fucking hard!

It's ridiculously easy to get laid. Quoting my dad "Everything gets fucked", but it's not easy to get laid with an attractive girl if you're not attractive yourself.

Now you can just go out there as an unattractive guy and fuck another unattractive girl but there's always the risk that you'll become known as the dude who fucks the ugly chicks which is basically social suicide. Furthermore, there are a bunch of dudes with higher standards who aren't genetically blessed but choose to work very hard on themselves and thus are not willing to settle with a standard girl.

This forum is almost one of the only places where these men can openly vent about their frustrations because society will just give generic advice to be yourself, just be confident, everyone is beautiful, blablabla. I think everyone deserves the right to complain from time to time, but only if those complaints fire them up to overcome their issues later.

[Lusty69]

@kratjeuh You are totally correct, but I think there is some value in not being super picky especially when getting back into dating and building momentum up, then just focus on increasing quality.

110.2kg this morning, so close to my first milestone on my weight loss journey which is to get under 110kg.

I broke down my weight loss into 10kg milestones to make the journey a little easier as ultimately I had close to 50kg to lose from my peak, but if I can turn that into 5 milestones and just focus on getting to each station on the mountain then it just seems to make it like less of a monumental task.

[Lusty69]

With all the rehab work, mobility and strengthening my lower back along with my mate giving me a few tips and doing some tempo and paused deadlifts I finally managed to push the weight on my deadlift with out back pain, added 30kg in one session. slowly see if I can work my deadlift back up to my old numbers.

The only slightly frustrating part of the big deadlift and leg session 7 sets of heavy deadlift with 5 of them being tempo sets meant that I had a little weight gain even though my diet didn't change, but the scales showed a decent drop in BF% and scales which means it was swelling and water retention from the big session, went up to 110.6kg then back to 110.2kg this morning, the timing just annoying with being at 110kg and wanting to hit under 110kg for Milestone 1 haha

But I know I will be there tomorrow or by the end of the week so I am excited.

[Lusty69]

FINALLY UNDER 110KG LET'S GO woke up this morning at 109.8kg

I am not sure if I mentioned how I broke up my weight loss task into 5 milestones so 1 down 4 to go or 39.8kg to lose

My milestones are
1 - Under 110kg (DONE)
2 - Under 100kg
3 - Under 90kg
4 - Under 80kg
5 - 70kg (maybe will go for 69kg because it is a nice number but will see how I look in the mirror when I get in the low 70's)

For reference, I had my top two abs showing when I hit 75kg pre-lockdowns.

Soon I will be lower than I was when I started posting on the forums, sort of sucks knowing I gained weight when I start with a weight loss goal, but I still had a lot of shit mentally I had to heal from and I was just will powering through that weight loss journey back then which then got super hard post break up from the relationship I was in.

I did notice when I do some deep shadow and inner healing work, bringing up emotional crap I end up soothing it with eating, so I am sort of happy to have done all the healing as much as I gained a bit of weight as I now am on the other side of it all where I can just go ok less talking about and feeling my emotions and more action time, but I also have noticed a lot of the work catching up with just the ability to start letting go of a few things I was holding onto as well.

I do feel in a way better place, and the emotion I am exploring or trying to release more now is Anger so I have been playing Viking war music and beats at the gym and just trying to get angry at the weights as its something I have repressed and struggle to express due to a few events in my childhood so I have the awareness of it all now it's just trying to build a better relationship and release/let go of a lot of Anger I am holding on to.
The side benefit is I have been more focused and hitting the weights harder doing this which is great

[Lusty69]

109.3kg tracking well and weight is still coming off quickly, had some great gym sessions too with my mate.

[Adrizzle]

Oi this is fucking crazy. Good shit

[Lusty69]

108.5kg this morning woo hoo, gone to the gym 7 days in a row, just sticking to a routine and just did some light work and grip stuff today.

Also started doing a little neck training want to have bigger forearms and neck once I lose weight so I can keep looking jacked but its also fun to train to change things up

[MakingAComeback]

Can you tell us about our your inner work dude?

How do you do it?

LMK

[Lusty69]

Can you tell us about our your inner work dude?

How do you do it?

LMK

Been a fair journey to be honest this is sort of the list of things that have just built on and built on over the years

-Doing a 4 week masculinity course along with a Tantra element where I challenged myself to go 60 days without ejaculation
-Having a sexuality mentor and doing various workshops with Sexual Quantum Leap and retreats to build the confidence of knowing internally that any woman I meet I can give a better sexual experience than 90% of other guys she will ever meet, the mindset on this and shift really helped me get laid a lot more as I let go of a lot of self-sabotage
-Movement coaching, breath work, cold/hot
-Working with various inner work coaches who are close to or have worked with people in the dating space
-Rebuilding my self-esteem and healing a lot of family dynamics and other issues with a longer-term coach I worked with
-Joining the peace timeline and learning how to do parts work (Internal Family Systems) to move and shift a lot of crap internally and heal my relationship to the feminine and help parts of me protecting me move through things

Then I have also on my own been doing as much letting go as I am able to and when possible meditation.

The other things I have been feeling into as well to help with confidence is knowing that looks money status help, but also at the same time completely letting go of that if it doesn't serve me.

My retarded belief that my height, my weight, my looks don't matter has given me almost super powers in the past to go for and feel entitled to super attractive women, and also reframe any rejection to I just need to appraoch more or improve my game.
And this retarded levels of self belief allowed me to sleep with women who seemed way out of my league in a pure SMV to SMV comparison, but I was just like I know this game stuff it means I can get the girl.

If anything I am like worse off now in belief and it does fuck me up a little on the quality of women and I limit myself only to shorter women even though in the past I have been with attractive taller women through my autistic levels of self belief and that looks and height don't matter.

Today I just seem to have embodied a lot of stuff I learnt to by default lead a women back to my place for sex with out trying, so I am excited with the fat loss, the better looks and also working on being more relaxed and letting go of more shit

[Lusty69]

Weight fluxed up a little but now back down to 108.6kg scales showing lower bf% than the higher up post at 108.5kg the standard water flux of weight loss but I am glad I am consistently on the down whilst getting stronger at the gym.

Pulled 150kg deadlift first time I have gone to that number since COVID happened and a range of injuries after so I am glad to be back pulling some half decent numbers, my goal is to work up to my old PR of 180kg and see if I can break that.

Looking into my next phase of so-called inner work after reflecting thanks to reading @MakingAComeback log and the question you asked above and integrating the practices with improving my dating life so I started a practice an old mentor of mine is currently doing for his community called Tranquil Wisdom Insight Meditation (TWIM) another friend of mine has been doing it under his guidance for 12 months now and it is a slow game of daily practice but I have seen the shift in him and he just radiates so much more positive energy, I guess the cool thing is because he lives in Sydney I see him in person every 6 months as much as we chat on the phone but I could see the change in him last year when I was in Sydney and also from our chats so it feel like a nothing to lose even if it did not affect my dating life there is just so much more radiating inner peace, love and happiness

[Lusty69]

108.0kg today so close to dipping into the 107s so looks like I am tracking well with 1kg/week on average loss, feeling quite sustainable in terms of food and diet and current exercise. I think adding in a few more walks does sort of increase the loss rate closer to 1.3kg so I will aim to do more afternoon walks but won't force it, gym is a bigger focus.

I also started learning and adding in TWIM meditation from the new course/community I joined with their instructions, I am allowing myself to suck with this and just letting myself meditate as long as I can in this state hitting about 7mins on my stopwatch but I am counting it as week 0 to get comfortable and used to the practice before moving to the instructions of doing 30-45mins in the morning daily.

The other practice I will try and implement is what's called 6R's just a process for releasing different things that pop up in the mind, I am focusing on not swearing so every time I swear I will 6R it.

I am happy with my gym and working out stuff but I feel it is time I start adding in some more productive time and balancing out my life to be more well-rounded in terms of adding in more productive work for my business I have been taking that a little slow of late with the main focus on my health.

I guess I want to try and slowly work my way to getting something similar to this day

Wake-up morning routine
Red light therapy, journal, meditate (30mins)
Coffee
work mode (2-4hrs deep work)
Gym
Food
work (2-4hrs)
Food
Walk/Talk to some women
Light work, Self-development/learning/podcasts
Wind down - Sleep

Right now I am a little derailed with porn use which I know isn't my complete focus to remove or get rid of as I don't want to overwhelm myself and remove that outlet which may serve me now to help me cope and keep to my diet and health goals. So my focus will be to slowly try and add in more work stuff, meetings I have are good to force me to get going and do work but I also have a big list of things I need to get on top of I keep putting off.

[Lusty69]

107.0kg super happy with the weight loss

My body is a little sore from all the gym sessions been pushing harder with my mate with me which is the benefit of having a gym buddy because my competitive side just tries to outdo him all the time, it's funny because he is stronger on the big 3 powerlifting moves but then I will outdo him on the machines, thanks injuries.... Either way has been good fun and training super hard

Been building the habit of daily TWIM meditations and also will start adding in more Metta (loving-kindness) throughout the day. I have seen how it transformed my friend's life and it feels like something I can go slow and easy with.

I think I was dealing a little with coaching and deep inner work burnout especially towards the end of last year so it feels nice not focusing too much on deep work and just doing some love and kindness meditations and focusing on just increasing my sit time from my current of 10mins to eventually 1hr