Manga 🇰🇷: October Update

[Manganiello]

Update

Been busy.
More or less settled in Seoul.

Work

New teaching semester started and it's incredibly challenging. Staying an hour longer each day feels like a necessity to stay on top of it.


Looks Maxxing

Dropped about 10-15 lbs since January. Currently hovering around my lowest weight.

Trying to understand Korean fashion norms. The style standards are about 2.5-3x higher than North America. Which is cool but simply have good style doesn't seem to be a differentiating factor as much.

Figuring out how Western vs. Eastern to go with my look. I'm guessing I'll probably be somewhere between a 80/20-60/40 split.

Guys in @Radical's Facebook group will know about the seemingly bizarre world that is male Korean beauty standards.


Dating

Bumble profile is doing well. Went on 2 dates. But I'm not feeling it. I don't care to swipe or to message. OLD for me is a been there done that. And I'm not really here to use a dating app.

Focused on approaching in the near term.
Haven't done it seriously for 18 months. So there's a lot of work to do.

Starting up approaching with a crazy workload probably isn't a good idea. But I never really had a nice easy schedule in the last 3 years. So I'm used to it by now.


Other

Dunno what else to report.
Feels like I'be mostly turned the corner on the ex. And she's probably done the same which is good. Still like her and wish her the best.

I think coming to Korea was like a fantasy but now that I'm the thick of it. It definitely feels like my life is harder here. Nvm the language barrier. It's the sheer workload, plus trying to understand an alien culture.

But I'm here and I'm in arguably the coolest city in the world with the most attractive girls in the world. So can't really complain much.

[MakingAComeback]

Hell of a chapter of your life dude

Life is to be lived. Enjoyed fully. Without limits.

You'll settle into approaching

[Manganiello]

Spring has arrived in Seoul and I'm slowly getting back into it.

20230401_175917.jpg

Overall Update
- I don't feel horny still, nevertheless I'm slowly getting back into it.


Day Game
- I almost wanted to be mute on this.
- but there might be value in posting like I did before.

Entry point
- I never really got good at day game.
- Probably Voldemort's stance on high volume anti-game isn't actually good for achieving good results.
- either way I'm slowly getting back into it.

Volume & AA
- went out 11 times since March 26. Still have AA. But it's verrryyy slowly going away. Asking for time was hard. Now it's easy. Just getting more comfortable.


Overall
- I need volume and feedback on my approaches more than anything.

- I don't have a feel for Day Game actually. So priority is to not only get volume but have a clear feel for what an approach should be at a gut level.


yesterday (0)
- very hard.
- Did maybe like 10ish opens.
- But I'm counting zero, because at this stage it doesn't count if I eject prematurely which I did for a few of them.


online
Nothing. Purposefully neglecting it rn. Day game is the focus til it makes sense to mix in online.

[Manganiello]

April 9 (6)

Approaches
Finally got real approaches in.
6 approaches
2 IDs
2 blow outs (no English)
2 walked away mindset


Lessons
I'm writing this purely for my own reference here




- Build yourself by doing progressively harder stuff each day. Where asking for time is hard. And then giving a complement and running away is hard. And then there will be a period where you can stop and say the words. But you're uncomfortable to stay in set, if you even do approach, but most of the time you'll skip tons and tons of girls feeling mentally dull, like there's a repelling magnetic field around each girl. And you cant break through it. And you're in a lethargic, negative mood.

Once you're at that point. Where complements and random questions most of the time are easy but the approach is hard. You need to label your behaviour as being a bitch.

Because that's what's happening. It's not that you're not in the right mood or don't know what to say. It's that you're being a bitch.

You need to take a cold shower. That starts off on the coldest settings, all the warm water left the tap and now the shower is just ice. Get into it.

Because your mind will give all the same excuses to not get cold. And notice how there's no "being ready" you'll never be ready. The water is fucking cold. And it sucks. Get in. There's no pump up. You just walk in. Do it or don't. Simple as that.

That's how the approaches need to work.


Also.
Even with that mindset it will be hard.

So here's somethinfs that helped.
1) deciding to approach within 60 seconds of getting to the venue.
2) Pick targets. Don't look around. Find one. Just one girl. Fixate on her and then go in. This will stop you from mindessly skipping
3) watch example approaches in similar situations. Seeing some done in Japan on YouTube I was easily able to see (Oh you can just walk up like that and it works? Cool.) That helped.
4) Still give yourself time to fuck up.
5) Stop caring about the goal for a bit. And just worry about the mindset and behaviour that will get you to approach. Forget about the approach count for a bit. Worry about being ballsy and fast.
6) Don't expect it to go well at the start. You're just getting the exposure rn.


Challenges
- being too creative with the opener. Or needing to be made me skip a few really cute girls when I was actually in a good mood. She's dressed so normal, what do I say? Idk. Just go say something, anything maybe.

[MakingAComeback]

WE'RE BACK IN BUSINESS BROTHER

ITS SUMMER TIME SOON

ITS GRINDING SEASON

IT'S SLAYING PUSSY SEASON

WE'RE BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER

-Ravi

[Bman]

Great to see you back and settling into Seoul. Ready to see you slay.

[Akilles7]

Good to hear from you @Manganiello. I really admire the balls you had to radically alter your life. You're an absolute inspiration and legend. Can't wait to read about your new adventures.

[Manganiello]

April 10 (5)

Probably like 9 approaches.
But im only counting 5.

5 went like this:
3 ignored/had no English
2 didn't fully stop and engage enough to have a full convo.

Bitched out on 4..
- 2 girls could understand me but ignored. I know that's common in Asia and you just push through but didn't do that.
- 2 where I could've continued but didn't.


I really didn't like today.
I mean I was going much faster and I was actually getting sets in a lot quicker than
before. But still.


Just felt in my head. Not in the mood. Lethargic etc. Did it.



Lessons:
+ Start sooner, have a way to just get into approach mode as soon as I arrive. No need for downtime. Even on long days where I'm dull and tired.

+ Possibly have something specific in my approach I want to do better that day.


...might edit this more. As I think about it.

[MakingAComeback]

Hear ya man.

I had a BRUTAL day game session a few weeks ago, where I legit was full on hating it

To make matters worse, that was a day I had in person coaching for day game

The brain is adapting.

Day game, needs to be done consistent. One day per week means you're susceptible to bad vibes.

A little, 3-4x a week, and you get into positive head space out there

I'll chime in more when I return to proper action with girls. I'm at The Doms bootcamp next week, and off to BP for Grind Season Year #2

Many more years to come

And many epic lays

We'll get to where we need to be king

Ravi

[Manganiello]

April 13 (5)

summary
5 approaches
2 total blow offs
2 sort-of blow offs
1 convo

I think Korea is a country where how you stop a girl REALLY matters. I knew this going in, but it's quite difficult.

Anyway I don't want to analyse it too much. I don't have enough data to make any conclusions.


other stuff
- saw 10 different people try and stop the same type of girls I was trying to approach while I was out. Literally 10.
- it was some sort of sales thing. No idea what or why they were going after those girls. Anyway I saw how they would stop people and what would work and what wouldn't.
- High energy stops seemed to do best. Or they would double team and literally put a girl into a corner and talk to her.


Seems like all Koreans have this forcefield around them you have to put energy into breaking. They're used to getting talked to buy all kinds of street hustlers (I think).


Concerns
I am a bit concerned that the language barrier might be an issue. I have to rely on girls to speak English. And it's possible to get better at Korean. But the effort might not be worth it depending how long I stay on this country.

I'm typically out of the house from 9am to 11:30pm. Each day. So time is a resource j have to use wisely.

---
Actually went out last 2 days. But I think that was a mistake because I had no plan too and now I feel like there was no break in my week to have a true night off... Oh well.

Lessons

So AA was significantly less this time around. I think 3 things helped.

1) a deliberate plan to go out immediately after work
2) Building up to approaches by going: Time, Directions, Hit-and-run complement, approach.
3) Being mad actually helped. I was pretty pissed at a chick on bumble for a trivial block she did.



Overall
I still suck and need to get over AA and fix my technique.

Oh ya. Also bought lifetime subscription to Bumble premium. I really would rather not use online to be honest. But the volume helps with an abundance mindset.

[Manganiello]

April 15 (9)

20230415_200546.jpg

- Felt sick.
- had to take some medicine to get this done.
- umm weak ass energy probably. But I got it done.
- hit my goal of 25 approaches this week. They aren't very good approaches lol. But I got them in.
- AA, not knowing what to do or say is the biggest block rn.



stats

9 approaches
5ish blow offs
4 engagements
1 convo that went past the opener.
0 numbers



Thoughts

Umm idk how to open in Korea. I keep getting conflicting advice from the rest of the world. But everyone says what works in the west doesn't work here. So I'm trying to cater my approach to what they advocate for.

Problem is...

- I don't know exactly what that is. Or how it looks.
- I just know the London front stop doesn't work. And theyre probably right.
- and the opendr needs to be leas direct and just like autistically start into a conversation. The approach is assumed. Nobody talks to strangers in Korea so it makes sense.



lessons

I can force myself to approach.
It was 6:30pm and I was thinking man. I just wanna skip. Not feeling it at all. But just realized I can make myself do it if I get enough reasons to.



other stuff

Went out last night with 2 OGs in Korea. They're kind of out of the scene now.
Pretty cool going out and every single bartender and owner gives you special treatment. Drank so fuckin much. Like 15 drinks about. Made me sick. But just like hearing and soaking in their experiences was pretty eye opening. Seems like if you can manage to put up with the steep learning curve, you basically can sleep with new girls as often as you want, so long as you can stomach the schedule.

[pancakemouse]

Can you find the Korean daygame community and ask what works for them?

[Manganiello]

April 20



new format
for next 30 days


...

Gonna record one 8-10min vlog that has:

1. Video shows proof I scribbles out some thought exercises I wrote out below.
2. Focuses on 1 positive message/lesson
3. Gratitude (might include this in the thought exercise).



These videos are for solely for me.
I'm putting them here for accountability.

...



sick af


Whatever illness I had on my last post got worse.

Skipped work for 2 days. Had a fever for 3 days. Lost my voice. And all the other cold symptoms but on steroids. Not Covid. Not the flu. No fucking clue what it is. Just sucks. Can't wait for it to go away.


No approaches obv.


But it's been nice.

The 3 days of just staring at a ceiling too sick to roll over and watch tv or look at my phone was refreshing actually.

In the same way a lot of pain breaks down the ego, I started to really think more deeply about stuff. I've been grinding so much I never took a chance to look up and think, no pun intended.

I think I realized a few things. Which I talk about in the video a bit.

1... I have a bad mindset about Korea. I more or less see it as a liability. Because I don't see myself permanently settling here, so any career advancement is mute and any girlfriend I get maybe won't stay. (But what a fucked up way of looking at a situation. Just realizing that... I could be going out and bustling, enjoying it, building myself up, and I'm just seeing it as kind of like a black hole that's eating up the limited years of my life. Seriously. Just realized that).

So that explains why I might not have been super excited about Korea, since I got here. I was excited until my first night actually. Then shit hit the fan and I thought. Wow, why the fuck am I doing this? And that feeling never fully left actually. I just stopped noticing it.



2... That fact I didn't notice it kinda brings up another thing. Where is my mindset rn? How did I not notice that or not address that for so long? I think there was this mindset of just power through all the shit I had to do. Fair. But my mindset should be sharp, positive and tough. And it's just not. So why not? Probably because I've made no effort to make it so and haven't bothered really checking in with myself. Like a deep authentic look.




3... I need to schedule time to be positive, to (A) create a good mindset, (B) frame situations well, and (C) find excitement. Those are all distinct activities and I'm not doing any of them.

So this video solves (A), but I'm still on the hook for (B) and (C).

... So

Actually. Huh. Thinking about this. I have a notepad. I'm gonna do one more thing for the video.

When it starts I have show a page with new date or the Day # I scribbled out, followed by a second page with belief reframing exercise about Korea, and a 3rd page of goals written down with 1 quote I like. Then I'll start the video. Might even add the gratitude journal on that. Video still has to be short.



Day 1

[Manganiello]

Can you find the Korean daygame community and ask what works for them?

Forgot to reply.

I know 1 guy who figured it out, and yes I'm talking to him.

And not to be cryptic, we haven't gone out together yet. So it's hard to say what the deal is.

[Aspire2Greatness]

Just wanted to chime in and say that I'm really glad you brought up the part about negative influences from friends, social media and so on. It's super hard not to get sucked into this wormhole of complaining and bitching about basically anything that so many people do. The weather, colleagues, women/dating, finances etc. And in my experience it's hard to find people that have a fundamentally positive outlook on life.

I can't remember where I heard or read it, but the idea of interconnectedness - the idea that everything in life is connected on a deeper level - that every living being like plants, humans and animals are all different forms of expression of cosmic/ineffable energy that gives life to everything we know - has really helped me find a lot more inner peace in a otherwise busy life.

Keeping a gratitude journal also helps a lot, especially when you've done it for a while and then re-read what you wrote down months back, making you realize how much you've have to be grateful for.

Hope you get well soon and stay strong!