Adam's Self-Improvement Log

Adam · Sun Apr 10, 2022 6:49 pm

I’ve been thinking about moving for a while. My current job allows me to live basically wherever I want and I’m currently torn between two locations. I live in PA and could very easily move into Center City Philadelphia. Pros: Tons of girls and high foot traffic, walkable, can easily visit my parents in the suburbs via car or train, a few decent bjj gyms, tons of cool bars. Cons: They pulled a ton of lockdown/vax mandate shit over the past two years, Winters suck, smelly/dirty, High crime, few weightlifting gyms.

I also lived in the Raleigh/Durham area in the past and have always wanted to go back (I moved away for work): Pros: Three big Universities and a great Life Sciences industry means lots of 20-something women, Warm and Sunny most of the year, I already have friends there at my old BJJ gym, Good Swing Dance scene, lots of cheap weightlifting gyms. Cons: less walkable so logistics are tougher, 8-hour drive from family, spread out so dating means driving instead of walking.

My heart was set on Raleigh for a while, but when I look at my goals for the year: If I really want to go all-in, it seems like a big city is the way to go. Also: I didn’t want to make this post. I’m not sure why, but I feel embarrassed asking for advice about a decision like this. My lease at my current apartment ends soon, so I will make my decision soon one way or another.

Adam · Mon Apr 18, 2022 10:14 pm

Made my decision this week. I'm moving to Raleigh at the start of May. Philadelphia reinstituted their mask mandate. SMH. Not dealing with that again. They'll probably lift it again soon, but I don't want to live in a place where I'm just savoring brief bouts of freedom and wondering when the boot will come down again.

Other than that. Things are going well. 5/5 gym sessions last week and diet was on point.

Adam · Mon May 02, 2022 11:57 pm

Short update:

I moved out of my apartment this weekend. I'm currently staying at my parents house. Mother's day is next Sunday so I'll stay here until then.

While I'm here, I've started working through the Jordan Peterson Future Authoring program. It's similar to other goal setting tools I've seen, but something about it makes the goal-setting process feel more official. I will post here once I'm done.

Bulking is going well. It's really, REALLY nice to be eating a caloric surplus for a change. And I think when I come to my next cutting period, I'll be able to go at it much harder than I was doing before thanks to this break. I'm doing 5 workouts a week right now and I'm enjoying it. It's weird, when I was doing 3 a week I'd find myself wanting to skip sometimes, but right now going to the gym doesn't feel like a burden at all. Maybe because I know that going to the gym means I get to eat more.

I've also been reading people's topics between sets at the gym. Really happy to see MAC getting rewarded for all of his hard work. It's incredibly encouraging to see that kind of progress.

Nothing to report on the dating front and there won't be until I move.

Pluto · Tue May 03, 2022 1:03 am

Adam wrote: ↑
Mon Apr 18, 2022 10:14 pm
Made my decision this week. I'm moving to Raleigh at the start of May. Philadelphia reinstituted their mask mandate. SMH. Not dealing with that again. They'll probably lift it again soon, but I don't want to live in a place where I'm just savoring brief bouts of freedom and wondering when the boot will come down again.

Other than that. Things are going well. 5/5 gym sessions last week and diet was on point.

You are so me from last year. I loved NYC and all it had to offer but the mask mandate nonsense and vax pass stuff became so much that I just sort of had it. One day I do want to go back to NYC but I worry if there will be an NYC to go back to. These cities are shooting themselves in the foot and being arrogant with their policies, thinking people won't leave for better places. At this point, who knows what is what anymore. Wish you the best as someone who has been there friend.

TerranBill · Tue May 03, 2022 3:51 pm

I've only been in Raleigh for a couple months but I'm definitely a fan. We had mandates for awhile but honestly most places don't care here unless you go to Durham(enforced vax passport checks, yikes). Holler at me when you're in town

Adam wrote: ↑
Mon Apr 18, 2022 10:14 pm
Made my decision this week. I'm moving to Raleigh at the start of May. Philadelphia reinstituted their mask mandate. SMH. Not dealing with that again. They'll probably lift it again soon, but I don't want to live in a place where I'm just savoring brief bouts of freedom and wondering when the boot will come down again.

Other than that. Things are going well. 5/5 gym sessions last week and diet was on point.

Tue May 03, 2022 8:32 pm

Proud of you bro keep working

I did the future authoring program and posted it here

Thank you for your kinds words in my lot

You have been helping me since I got here and are one of the boys

I am gonna make it in life Adam, trust me, I work hard and the coaching Andy and my advisors from the group do with me is getting deep into my brain

I wanna see absolute killers here making bank fucking stunners and doing big things in this world

Let that be you

Btw I’m going to see Dr Peterson speak soon

Keep hammering,
MAC

Adam · Tue May 03, 2022 9:56 pm

TerranBill wrote: ↑
Tue May 03, 2022 3:51 pm
I've only been in Raleigh for a couple months but I'm definitely a fan. We had mandates for awhile but honestly most places don't care here unless you go to Durham(enforced vax passport checks, yikes). Holler at me when you're in town

Adam wrote: ↑
Mon Apr 18, 2022 10:14 pm
Made my decision this week. I'm moving to Raleigh at the start of May. Philadelphia reinstituted their mask mandate. SMH. Not dealing with that again. They'll probably lift it again soon, but I don't want to live in a place where I'm just savoring brief bouts of freedom and wondering when the boot will come down again.

Other than that. Things are going well. 5/5 gym sessions last week and diet was on point.

Thanks man, I'll definitely hit you up when I'm down there. Bummer to hear that Durham has been that way. I have some friends there from my old MMA gym.

Adam · Fri May 13, 2022 9:53 pm

Still at the parent's house. My family is going on a vacation down to Virginia next week, so the plan at present is to go on Vacation with them, then instead of driving back to PA with everyone else, continue down to Raleigh.

I have to admit, I'm having a lot of second thoughts about moving out of state. I've been going over my goals in my head and considering whether I need to move to another state to achieve them or if I could achieve them just as well in Philly. I think a lot of my hesitancy to move away comes from wanting to be close to my family. My parents and siblings all live in PA. So do most of my friends. But I'm planning to move to Raleigh because the covid policies are better and it's a bit warmer year round. I can meet girls in Philly as well as I could down south. Maybe even easier since there's so much more foot traffic. But then again, there's the crazy covid paranoia making things harder.

This post is a bit of a ramble. Just wanted to put down some thoughts I've been having. It feels whiny to write it but I figure it's better to get it out than keep it inside.

Sun May 15, 2022 12:55 pm

Comfort kills.

I was uncomfortable for months being in a city that is literally 22.5 times bigger than where I spent most of my life

I was intensely uncomfortable to the point of physical sickness when I had to gut up and talk to girls in the day time every day for months

I was sickeningly uncomfortable with going to night clubs and asking girls back on dates

But when you face your fears and discomforts on the other side of that is the winner's club

TOTAL ABUNDANCE

If you're going to have an epic life, you need to get where the action is, and where you can really lay down a game plan for big things

In comfort nothing really materialises

The brain has to be in a certain state for you to expand

MAC

Adam · Tue May 24, 2022 8:15 pm

I drove down to Raleigh this past Sunday. I'm currently staying at an AirBnB in the city so I can look at apartments in person. I am still feeling conflicted about moving far from the rest of my family, but I'm also excited to live somewhere new. I think I like Raleigh as a city. It's not nearly as populous as Philadelphia, but it's way cleaner and roomier. Wider streets, more trees, less traffic, but still pretty walkable.

Adam · Fri May 27, 2022 1:10 am

Quick update:

Activated Tinder Gold on Tuesday night and boosted. Got about 5 matches and 10 likes. 3-4 girls worth matching with from the likes. Pretty darn good considering my pictures are still far below what they could be. I'm feeling better about moving here.

I visited a BJJ gym on Wednesday night and trained there. Super-fun time. Tonight I'm trying out a local salsa dance event. I took some lessons last year so I have a few moves but never practiced them at a social dance. Swing is my favorite but salsa tends to attract hotter girls so it could be worth getting into it

Jacobpalmer123 · Fri May 27, 2022 1:14 am

Sounds like things are going good dude. Do you ever watch bjj instructionals? They can be super helpful.

Wow moving to NC I'm excited for you. I look forward to hearing all your fun stories.

Adam · Fri May 27, 2022 3:07 am

Jacobpalmer123 wrote: ↑
Fri May 27, 2022 1:14 am
Sounds like things are going good dude. Do you ever watch bjj instructionals? They can be super helpful.

Wow moving to NC I'm excited for you. I look forward to hearing all your fun stories.

Thanks man. I sometimes watch instructionals on YouTube if I want to brush up on a move I learned in class or if I'm focusing on a position and want some extra pointers. I like Chewjitsu and TriStar gym. I've also watched a few DVDs if that's what you're thinking of. I actually have a hard time sitting down and paying close attention to them. My mind tends to wander more than it does when I watch a short YouTube video for a move or position.

Jacobpalmer123 · Fri May 27, 2022 4:09 am

Oh I agree. I have a bunch of Gordon Ryan and John Danaher instructionals and it makes a big difference but its hard to watch more than 30 min at a time. I got the body lock instructional and I was able to pull a move on someone. Escapes are a go to for becoming good at first.

I'm a former wrestler so I leaned into my strengths and did a lot of mount and guard passing instructionals when really I should focus on bottom game.

For youtube theres a lot of good ones on Bernardos channel.

Adam · Sun Jun 12, 2022 9:21 pm

One goal for the year done. I've officially moved to Raleigh, NC. Found a very nice apartment two blocks from downtown. I'm currently sleeping on a mattress on the floor but have furniture on its way through Amazon. Met up with @TerranBill and some friends of his last weekend and had a fun time.

Dating: Tinder has been pretty good. I have two dates scheduled for this week. I've been getting lots of likes and matches even though my profile still has plenty of room for improvement.

Physique: I'm a little over 2 months into bulking. I'm up 15 lbs from my leanest. I've been hitting the gym 5 days a week since I started bulking. The plan I've discussed with my trainer is to continue the bulk until after the 4th of July, then switch to a cut.

What I did today: Hit the gym, bought groceries, filled out the move-in checklist for the apartment.