MattsCrib wrote: ↑Wed Mar 24, 2021 6:39 pm
If your struggles are as real as you've written - I'm so sorry. Damn. How is it POSSIBLE to get 2000 rejections?
Other guys here: what the hell are guys like him doing wrong?????
I've literally seen way smaller, uglier guys getting laid. I've seen antisocial guys get laid. I just... Don't get it.
How can you guys even say that "it's worth it" and "results will come" - this guy has been trying to improve himself for over ten(!) years.
I'm really sorry, but people who just blatantly lie that "you just have to try harder lol" are... Wrong.
Maybe you should just not try anymore. Maybe i'm completely wrong, but if everything you're saying is true then... Why do you even bother?
Why not focus on actual positive things that ARE under your control? If women fundamentally don't like you after ten years of self improvement... Like..
I'm baffled, confused... Because on one side, I see NORMAL LOOKING guys who are not freaking 6 foot 5 get at least some girlfriends and on the other side, I see guys like you who... Just wtf? In your picture, you look normal.
I see partially myself in you, except I haven't approached 2000 girls. I still have the dislike towards relationships, romance and sex (but not towards girls on a platonic level)
So I beg you,
please prove me wrong and succeed I really, REALLY want to see you to succeed because right now - as a person who has just read your story, hasn't seen your full appearance and doesn't know which parts are exaggerated - I just don't believe you can. I really, REALLY hope you can.
Thanks for your post!
Yeah, I get it - it's a strange position to be in as a guy, and around the age of 27, I did experience deep sadness and even loneliness, to the absolute core that it is possible to feel these emotions. I had the realisation: shit, I'm not going to have the dream wife, the kids running around, I have not made the cut. I felt terrible for about a week but shrugged it off. I love the work I do and am good at it, am respected by my colleagues and am trusted to deliver complex and difficult projects. I got over it like we as men must do. We all have a cross to bear in life my friend, I will bear mine.
I'm not exaggerating. I'm too old for that, have put in too much time, and am not here to waste ANYONE's time - I will put in 100% every single day and follow the advice the group gives.
Last year, I could prove to you I am not exaggerating within a second, as I have posted all field reports online. The forum I was posting on got taken off the internet (company name started with an R, ended in a D), so it's gone, but I also took 2 boot camps with this company at 2 grand a piece, and can actually provide you with the screenshot of the invoices if that would clarify that I am not bullshitting or something (lol). I am not exaggerating mate, like I said, what's done is done now - I am here to improve myself and change, what I have done has not made the mark.
Further clarity on numbers:
Nights out followed the same format: (A) Warmup: I would always open 15 girls to warmup, within short period of entering the venue - if they are receptive, I would talk to them for as long as possible. Very, very few were receptive off the bat, so I just kept opening to build momentum. I could do this easily. (B) 5-10 quality approaches: Here, I would open strong, and really try to get a conversation going, try to get a connection and hopefully find someone who I like, who perhaps liked me too. Over the 2 years regular, 4 nights per week night-game, very few girls were interested in talking to me. Post Uni, from 24-25 (before I went travelling), I went on holiday with my bros, just to get drink basically (I was not drinking when doing 'game'), and when we went to Greece, I got one girl to talk to me all night. I then asked her to go for a walk on the beach with me, and she said she couldn't leave her friend. That was that.
Day-game, I just did the standard stuff, ask girls for the time to open, then try to get a conversation going, get a number. I got to the point where I was getting 10-20 numbers per week. And you know what? After 3 months of this, not one girl texted back.
In total, these were between 1,000-2,000 approaches. That is a genuinely accurate number, I am not exaggerating, I am telling the truth. I am happy to be open and honest with you all here and in time you will get to know me. I am a genuine and honest bloke and I am truthful, loyal, and not a liar at all! Sorry if this sounds defensive but I had to address the issue of 'exaggeration'. Again, had I been asked last year, I would have had a journal of 400 pages to link to you. But, it's gone.
"Maybe you should just not try anymore. Maybe i'm completely wrong, but if everything you're saying is true then... Why do you even bother? Why not focus on actual positive things that ARE under your control? If women fundamentally don't like you after ten years of self improvement... Like.."
It's not about women, brother. It's not about them anymore. This is about me.
I have been grinding my ass off since I was 11 years old man. It never was going to be an easy life for me, been in a challenging environment from day 1, but always been a hard worker and fairly smart. Went to a failing school (30% pass rate, tragic but true) and got straight A's and went to a top 10 Uni despite it, which I am still proud of to this day, I literally had to teach myself in my own time after school, and I still achieved my goal. Some of my friends in school made other choices, they are now in prison. I chose the path of hard work and got the first job I could (paper round lol). Why should I give up when I have given my heart and soul to be a better person? I appreciate life itself and the growth that is possible. I have had some experiences in life that just do not let me give up, I volunteered on a hospital ward for 2 years, I have seen men in their 60s and 70s with a terminal prognosis weep because they wasted their life, beg me to not waste my life, promise me to keep going and try to 'go on and do something. I made a promise I won't break for anyone and the only way I will stop trying is if you take a gun and blow my fucking brains out. I will be here getting rejected until I am 90 years old.
"Why not focus on actual positive things that ARE under your control? "
Agree, good point actually. I do. My hobbies are also a focus:
-Playing guitar daily (11 years)
-Learning Spanish (3 years daily)
-Photography & Videography (weekends mostly)
-Learning about quantum physics and biology
-Politics, Society
-Debating and discussing with my best friend (weekly)
After the age of 27, I stopped 'trying' with women and think about them very little. If you know about NoFap, I do that and enjoy building up large streaks.
I know everyone else finds someone, I've watched all my friends get married and have kids, have been best man at 2 weddings lol. So this is nothing new to me mate. I do actually have female friends, have no problem getting on well with colleagues and in the past, staff (in my previous role I had 22 staff, most of which were female, obviously I got on with everyone fine - I've actually won achievement awards at every job I've had and my LinkedIn has 6 really glowing testimonials from previous employees who loved working for me and found I was a supportive boss...they happened to be female...I just want to say I am not a total monster everyone hates or something, I have good friends and good relationships with my family etc).
I have entertained the thought that there is something deeper going on, at 'energetic' levels, or within the subconscious. I am quite a practical dude and not too into the esoteric, but even I went there. Have you seen the movie Taxi Driver? In it, there is a scene where Travis Bickle is driving around late at night, and he declares: "I'm God's lonely man". When I was on Tinder for 1.5 years and looked at my screen and saw there were 6 matches, and they wouldn't reply to save my fucking life, I did have the thought that perhaps I am God's lonely man, sent here to atone for the sins of a past life or pay a karmic debt. A bit mad but I did have this thought. It was a passing, fleeting thing, and not something I felt again lol.
There is no way for me to tell you why I have ended up in the position I am in, but it's probably a mixture of: (a) being ugly, (b) low self-esteem, (c) women not having any interest in guys they find unattractive (can you really blame them?)
You made some great points and your post was valuable to me, MattsCrib. I am not able to reassure you that I will succeed or prove to you that I have any answers because I am not a guy who figured this stuff out, and women do not want to be with me. I am quit ugly and have low self-esteem. I am the last guy who can reassure anyone I will succeed - I here because I need help bro. I might as well be honest? But what I can say is I will do my best.
I know this looks negative as fuck but let's not leave it on that tone lmao!!! Can we just agree that tomorrow we will have a fucking kick ass day and crush our goals? I did fine today and don't want to end on a downer as it's my bedtime in 20 mins fuck haha.
Thanks,
MAC