Love this insight man. It highlights yet again that we're all just human beings who are trying to make it in the short span we have.MakingAComeback wrote: ↑Sun Nov 27, 2022 10:34 pmJust back from seeing L, told her I'm leaving here in 3 weeks, but want to keep seeing here and explore companionship. She said it's cool, for now, but may not be moving forward. I told her this is totally cool, and if it's not OK, we can just explore friendship or move on - we've still had a good time and I've enjoyed her a lot.
We made out a bit and she opened up and we got way closer, cuddled, held each other for hours.
It's been AGES since i've had this kind of contact, I had it with my FWB months ago, but since, nada.
It felt like, and being engaged, present, and having physical touch is very healing for me.
L has a very insane backstory, man. She has lived quite a twisted life. She's dated some fucked up dudes, think her longest relationship of several years was an ex convict and they lived a totally degenerate life of 5 day non-stop coke binges. She'd call in sick to work and just fucked her life up endlessly. And the chap was a loser, full on, when she broke up with the guy he showed up at her place of work and outside her house for 3 weeks with roses, crying his eyes out. He eventually set fire to her place.
He also was given a mental breakdown once by L when she told him she has a high body count, because L was the 2nd girl he'd been with, lol.
This is why you just have to do this self improvement work and spend a few years shagging. You need the experience and to learn about women.
L has a boatload of trauma and is quite screwed up. But I will def. continue to see her now I've been totally honest and highlighted that I am leaving soon, and also, that I just enjoy the companionship and that is all I am looking for from her. She understood like I said and now honesty has been established I have no reservations, all good.
It is a pleasure to be able to talk to a chick who has some depth, and substance, and is on a healing journey. She is lovely and a few hours with her is incredibly soothing, I can tell you that much.
I think women getting deep, deep into degeneracy and accumulating high body counts psychologically destroys them. L used to go to raves legit 7 nights a week and drink a tonne and do coke, non stop. For legit years.
This is a pattern with the girls I attract into my life: invariably, broken, massively screwed up pasts, and with a boatload of issues.
I've expressed it throughout my log, but it's just a theme at this stage.
The Red shirt year is necessary. Fatties and undesirables are what I mostly got, and therein is the reason why the next stage of my journey will involve making serious PHYSICAL changes to physique and just material circumstance.
It is a refreshing change from the chaotic nature of the dating game. Some of leads I've had lately really did suck and annoy me a fair. Last date was quite unpleasant and whilst it didn't affect me as badly as it would have months ago, it is still not pleasant to experience and it set me up to go back into 'endurance mode' - which is just when IO know I will have to go on 20 - 30 more dates, and possibly a good stretch of time, before another lay.
That's how it goes.
MAC
What you wrote about L is the perfect example of why we must work to make the most out of our own lives, so we can surround ourselves with kind of people we want.
She seems like a sweetheart. Even though her past is crazy, it's also humbling when you think about it. Women go through a lot of shit just like men. They're human beings just like us. However, I'd argue that they can still live a nice life without really needing to face any significant challenges because the right man will step up to provide the love & protection they crave. However, a man is not afforded this luxury. He must be forged. He must penetrate life with the utmost courage to realize his ideal self.
Keep on pressing, brother.