Thrice log. How to deal with a bad date

The main purpose of this forum; tell us what goals you're working on.
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Thrice
Posts: 478 | Thanks: 296
Joined: Fri Apr 09, 2021 8:33 am
Name: Mohamed
Goal: get laid
Age: 32
Motto: GO GET SOMETHING FUCKING DONE
Location: Italy

Thu Jun 22, 2023 7:53 pm

Squilliam wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 5:41 pm
At your level you should not focus on Instagram
Why? People connect with ig and use it like a dating app
Squilliam wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 5:41 pm
You should work on moving somewhere else if there aren't many young girls in your area
I can't leave my house where i don't pay the rent and even make some money with airbnb to move somewhere else find a shitty job and pay the rent to a stranger

I don't live in Milan but Parma has a population of 200k with many young girls, i just said that joining clubs and courses full of boomers is not a good way to get the type of social circle. Becoming a dj is, having a cool ig page also, girls like it
Squilliam wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 5:41 pm
And is there any reason you can't go out approaching on your own?
No, i went out alone several times but didn't approach, i pussied out because i was probably the only one by himself without friends, also because some girls were looking at me like I'm a creep

I will work on lowering my bodyfat and try to be the best looking/dressed guy in the club and start approaching. I admit i didn't care of this aspect, i don't even have enough clothes yet
Squilliam wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 5:41 pm
Isn't daygame more common in Europe than in America?
Daygame doesn't exist in europe, it's an american thing, in fact i wouldn't be able to translate "day game" in italian or french or german, it doesn't exist
jakeD wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 6:02 pm
How do you expect to get laid with young hot girls without tackling that?
It's time to shit or get off the pot

I didn't do it till now because i felt the small town pressure, it's not like london where you approach girls you won't ever see again, but it's not an excuse because i can approach until i exhaust the potential of my 200k in terms of tinder and cold approach, this will allow me to decide if i want to move to a bigger city even if it's not convenient at all, i would have to work as a dishwasher and approach after work, but if it's the only option i will have to do it

My idea is if you're not attractive in a 200k you're not attractive anywhere, girls have the same taste despite the beauty is subjective bullshit, but i will have to move anyway to see what happens when someone at my level of attractiveness plays the number game

London would be great

I have to exhaust the potential of my city first, because moving would be the worst scenario for me, if i had an online job i would be enthusiast about moving but i don't
Looking for a hardcore accountability partner👇🏽

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MakingAComeback
Posts: 4132 | Thanks: 4864
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Goal: 3k Per Month Post Tax
Age: 32
Motto: POSITIVE SELF TALK

Thu Jun 22, 2023 8:13 pm

Homie forget London, that is the worst place for cold approach in the world after NYC, if you're not: (a) white, (b) willing to become a true day game warrior.

Europe, is fantastic for day game.

I am living life in Budapest, and approach 7 days a week. Talking to pretty girls daily, it's fun. I found Poland was also good, Krakow and Warsaw.

The thing is, you evidence the real problems above: you think girls are looking at you like you're a creep, etc, due to trauma and mental health problems.

The dating game, if you're a minority, is going to be a lot of grinding, will be quite rough at the best of times, and will be a multi year journey. If you're not good looking, and not a guy girls naturally like, geuss what, you wiill need to become a fucking CAST IRON MAN, because the game will make you go to extreme lengths for a minuscule crumb of progress, and poof, it's gone.....

You will need to do a tonne of healing man. Like, a tonne. You should find a lot of support, read, study, connect with this sort of community.

People forget, I spent YEARS getting my health and mental health right. You think I am bad now? Should have seen me a few years ago lol.

When guys have deep issues in their mind, this needs to be prioritised.

Mo can make it, but he needs to heal, and develop a lot of mental strength.

It can be done - I myself have to put in extreme grinding, and basically live a life that is WAR, just to get a text, let alone a date, let alone a lay, which I've not had in 9 months.

What we gloss over, is for males whose SMV is lower, and who are not getting preselected (no to few matches, dating is slow as fuck at the best of times), there is a pathway for success, but it is the numbers game on steroids pretty much and a case of endless, endless grinding, endlessly improving, and only seeing fleeting success here and there.

Chris, said these guys should not be approaching. Chris said these guys need to heal.

I agree.

I spent 4 years healing.

I then came here, and became The Godfather of Grinding. I reconstructed myself out of fucking steel.

Essentially, Mo is going to have to do the same thing.

If him getting nothing on the apps caused him a mental breakdown, how will he survive this game? I had NOTHING on the apps for 7-8 months, and even when I got new pics, still got fuckin REKT. I was shadow banned. Now, I am getting a little something. Nothing major, far from anything to write home about, and no dates or anything.

This, requires basically extreme mental strength to withstand the endless shitstorm, year after year.

We need to be careful when advising hardcases.

Mo, can get a girlfriend and find love for himself. But that, will be after proper healing work, and he will need to get to the point when he no longer feels he is being looked at like a creep or girls are avoiding eye contact.

I assure you, none of that is happening, no one is avoiding eye contact, he is just anxious, stressed, and has some mental illness.

If he was chill as FUCK, confident, cool, he'd thrive socially like the rest of us.

I know because I was him, totally fucked in the head, 10 x more mentally ill than he is right now.

I got here and that's atleast something

My 2C

Ravi
-Your friend, Ravi

Consistent Performance Coach, Admin of WinnerWithin, and Seeker of Human Potential

My FB Group for Consistent Performance & Goal Achievement
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Squilliam
Posts: 2067 | Thanks: 362
Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2021 12:57 am
Goal: Be happy
Age: 24
Motto: Pain is temporary. Greatness lasts forever

Thu Jun 22, 2023 8:17 pm

Thrice wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 7:53 pm
Why? People connect with ig and use it like a dating app
If you can't even get success from online dating, you are not going to get anywhere with Instagram. You are wasting your time with this. You're much better off improving your looks & photos and building a better online profile if you don't want to do cold approach.

The only kinds of guys who actually get consistent girls from Instagram are very high status desirable guys.

You say you want to bang hot girls but what are you actually doing about it? It's not just going to be handed to you.

How badly do you really want it? If you wanted it really badly, you'd do anything to achieve it. From what I can see, you don't want it really badly. You just kind of want it.

It's not going to be easy or comfortable to get there. Nothing worth having in life is easy. This whole focus on instagram to me just seems like an excuse so that you can avoid taking action. If you want to bang hot girls, then you need to go outside and start talking to girls, or you need to improve your online dating profile. Ideally, do both.
check out my blog: https://squilzpursuit.wordpress.com/

- Do 1000 approaches by end of 2024 (~350/1000)
- Get laid from daygame
- Learn game and stop being a social autist
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natedawg
Posts: 879 | Thanks: 221
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Age: 35
Motto: Whatever you do, don't quit.

Thu Jun 22, 2023 11:43 pm

Welcome back, man.

Regarding goals, it will come down to what's most important for you. The #1 challenge you will face is trying to change everything at once. Won't happen.

What's most important to you right now? I'd list those out & begin from there.
2023-2024 Goals

Year 1: Pg 1-42

"As long I don't quit, I can't lose." - Alex Hormozi

**Feeling lost/unmotivated? Read this:viewtopic.php?p=48007#p48007

** Trust in the process Andy laid out for me: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1279346/11913966
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Thrice
Posts: 478 | Thanks: 296
Joined: Fri Apr 09, 2021 8:33 am
Name: Mohamed
Goal: get laid
Age: 32
Motto: GO GET SOMETHING FUCKING DONE
Location: Italy

Fri Jun 23, 2023 11:19 am

Squilliam wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 8:17 pm
If you can't even get success from online dating, you are not going to get anywhere with Instagram. You are wasting your time with this. You're much better off improving your looks & photos and building a better online profile if you don't want to do cold approach.
every good picture that would work on tinder is a picture i can use for instagram, so what's the problem?
Squilliam wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 8:17 pm
The only kinds of guys who actually get consistent girls from Instagram are very high status desirable guys.
there's some misunderstanding here, i live in a 200K, you're thinking i want to run "instagram game" a la fresh and fit, i'm not, this is not miami and we don't have the type of girls that fresh and fit interview here

i'm thinking of creating an instagram looking happy, stylish, sexy and with some friends, and thats it, no indicator of status/money level, i'm in a small town and it's not needed, girls will reply if you're attractive enough

the instagram you're talking about is needed in a big american city, not here. here i will just take good pictures for tinder and instagram at the same time, i will have to add add some pictures in cklubs and with friends on intagram to look social and normal, because actually thats what girls use instagram for, to see if you're normal
Squilliam wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 8:17 pm
It's not going to be easy or comfortable to get there. Nothing worth having in life is easy. This whole focus on instagram to me just seems like an excuse so that you can avoid taking action. If you want to bang hot girls, then you need to go outside and start talking to girls, or you need to improve your online dating profile. Ideally, do both.
i will lose this last 4 pounds and go back to take picturs, i want it really bad, i'm ashamed to say that i didn't find the balls to take pictures of myself while people passing by are looking and didn't have balls to approach when i went out alone, even if i want it really bad, so i will set goals and deadlines to do this stuff or die
Looking for a hardcore accountability partner👇🏽

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Thrice
Posts: 478 | Thanks: 296
Joined: Fri Apr 09, 2021 8:33 am
Name: Mohamed
Goal: get laid
Age: 32
Motto: GO GET SOMETHING FUCKING DONE
Location: Italy

Fri Jun 23, 2023 3:21 pm

natedawg wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 11:43 pm
Welcome back, man
Thank you nate!
natedawg wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 11:43 pm
What's most important to you right now? I'd list those out & begin from there.
meet a cute girl, date and fuck, to be honest thats my number 1 priority, i'm stuck and i feel the only way to unstuck myself is do it for the first time, only thing is she doesent have to be a 5 or 4 because i would just feel worse, talking from experience
MakingAComeback wrote:
Thu Jun 22, 2023 8:13 pm
If him getting nothing on the apps caused him a mental breakdown, how will he survive this game? I had NOTHING on the apps for 7-8 months, and even when I got new pics, still got fuckin REKT. I was shadow banned. Now, I am getting a little something. Nothing major, far from anything to write home about, and no dates or anything.
i agree Mac, the way i will heal is expose myself over and over, keep trying new pictures, keep getting rejected, trying tinder with new pics, get zero matches, get broken to pieces, and try again, with a new set of pics

i feel my life is going down the drain, i have energy and anger i want to use, no time for some sort of zen healing, just, get a mental breakdown, try again, until i completely desentesize myself, no sitting at home anymore, unless i'm lifting and stretching
Looking for a hardcore accountability partner👇🏽

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MakingAComeback
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Fri Jun 23, 2023 5:52 pm

OK Mo.

I do sense a steely determination in your words today.

Remember, you are tougher than you think...............

If you're wanting to go down the exposure therapy route, then you know what to do man. Take it ONE approach at a time, and in time, you will be an approach machine.

R
-Your friend, Ravi

Consistent Performance Coach, Admin of WinnerWithin, and Seeker of Human Potential

My FB Group for Consistent Performance & Goal Achievement
https://www.facebook.com/groups/ironwilltribe
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Thrice
Posts: 478 | Thanks: 296
Joined: Fri Apr 09, 2021 8:33 am
Name: Mohamed
Goal: get laid
Age: 32
Motto: GO GET SOMETHING FUCKING DONE
Location: Italy

Wed Jun 28, 2023 5:57 pm

Last Saturday night was WILD, so i have created my first super shitty instagram pics with only 2 pics with me looking autistic, asked a bunch of people if they wanna hang out and the only guy that enthusiastically said yes is an illegal immigrant

We went in this club and he started approaching like crazy with his broken italian, he drinks and smokes a lot too and does cocaine

After 2 drinks i started approaching too, i only got blow out rudely by a land whale i didn't like anyway, all the others girls were very sweet in telling me they have boyfriends

The forth girls i approached was a smoking hot 21 yo, she was hot as fuck, i just straight up asked her is she wanted to know me and she said yes, this is the first time for me and i didn't know what to say hahahha

Like this girl was very hot, beautiful face, nice legs, when she immediately said yes i didn't know what to say to be honest so i just started to ask the ussual question, where are from blablabla, she said she's from Milan, studied in england and going back to england soon, after that her friends called her and she went on the dance floor with them

I didnt ask her to stay in touch for 2 reasons:

- when you ask girls for watsap they ask for instagram first to see what type of guy you are

- i don't have a good "landing" intagram page where i look "normal" and not autistic yet
https://instagram.com/_momo_.d_?igshid=MzNlNGNkZWQ4Mg==

I have recieved a lot of motivation from this experience, i hate my self for beign autistic and i want to change so bad

The guy i went put with is here from only 3 months and already has a HOT 21 yo girlfriend, and she's italian, before her he had another girlfriend, not italian

So 2 girls in tree months, without papers, without money, without anything, the guy almost drowned to come to Europe

Despite this i still had some blackpill moments thinking about blackpill stuff... Man talk about trauma..

This is more than enough proof the limits are in my head


Even if I'm 99% that the hot Girls wasent attracted and just wanted to talk because it was a wild night for everydoby i still had fun talking to her, felt somewhat validated, felt really good getting so close to a girl that hot

I bought phenibut from predatornutrition, it should give me the same social freedom without alcohol

Now i have to do two things:

-go out and approach on weekend with or without a partner, it's 10 times more fun with friends, but if i want to improve my life i have to go out every weekend

-take pictures for online datind and instagram, for all those girls who want to see you on ig before giving their watsap, what stopped me here is also the fact that i don't have a friend to take pictures with

If i don't improve i will only have myself to blame

Some pictures of my current style, Saturday night i had the iron maiden shirt
jakeD wrote:
Sat Jun 24, 2023 11:31 pm
You already look good and have good pics so in my mind the only things left are to move if necessary and then hit OLD and approaching and night game hardcore.
My only 2 limits are taking pictures alone and going out alone, need to grow some balls because it's a matter of life and death
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MakingAComeback
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Thu Jun 29, 2023 8:38 am

FUCK YEAH
-Your friend, Ravi

Consistent Performance Coach, Admin of WinnerWithin, and Seeker of Human Potential

My FB Group for Consistent Performance & Goal Achievement
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Crisis_Overcomer
Posts: 1017 | Thanks: 720
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Thu Jun 29, 2023 10:22 am

Good fucking job.
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Thrice
Posts: 478 | Thanks: 296
Joined: Fri Apr 09, 2021 8:33 am
Name: Mohamed
Goal: get laid
Age: 32
Motto: GO GET SOMETHING FUCKING DONE
Location: Italy

Sat Jul 01, 2023 3:38 pm

Man another "good" night (didn't have sex), same club, same friend (the illegal immigrant guy i stumbled in with instagram, good guy, beautifull soul, god bless him)

I didn't want to to get too wasted, just one drink to get going, was almost sober, i tried to use the tekno music to "meditate", i closed my eyes and danced for two hours, trying to not think at anything, just breath and dance reaching a sort of trance situation without drugs, it was good, it's a small club, no need to approach immediately, i danced, had a lot of fun, girls saw me dancing this means they wont think i'm a creep older guy who's just looking for pussy

also most people dance inside first, at about 3am they start going out outdoors to relax and talk with their friends, thats when i start approaching anyway, my initial goal was 10 approaches, i did 6:

I also need someone who speaks italian to understand if i'm doing something wrong @AskTheDom

1) -can we get to know each other? if you're single..
- No, yes i'm single, but no

what an ugly fucking bitch, barely a 6, she didn't have to add "yes i'm single but no" after the first no, i wasen't hurt, reading the hundreds of approaches of @MakingAComeback and @colgate just changed man, it's the equivalent of the AA program

this bitch was looking at me for the rest of the night loughing and dancing and not giving 2 fucks about her, she kept looking while i was looking at her, it was clear i don't give much of a fuck, this is the best revenge


2)-can we get to know each other?
- no thanks
- ok
- if you can give me a cigarette we can talk
- i don't smoke, bye

this girl wasen't rude at all, nice girl, but she said if you can give me a cigarette i thought she was not interested and was trying to make fun of me and exercise power, but maybe i was totally wrong and you'll understand why

3)-can we get to know each other?
-no

nice blonde, she said no with usual bitch face, nothing special

4) this girl was with a group of tree friends (yes i can approach groups), walked up to them, grabbed her gently by the arm so she can turn and notice me

-can we get to know each other?
-no

5) i signed on watsap that i approached 6 girls, i don't remember the fifth girl, but she said no i guess, i don't remember her face and the conversation

6)cute brunette, she looked at least to be honest, it turns out she's 17, her friend is hotterto be honest, she had this top and you could see the tits basically hahah, anyway i aproached the brunette because the other one was talking to some guy

--can we get to know each other?
she looks at me for 10 seconds like she didn't expected like all girls, but without a mean face, i recieve a "no" anyway, for some reason i stay there and don't move but don't talk to her either

after 5 minutes she restarts the conversation

- if you can find me a cigarette i will talk to you
- challange accepeted, i don't smoke but i will find you a cigarette!

no one wants to give a fucking cigarette, they scared that other people will ask, so i approached a group of black guys, didn't want to lose time so i just told give a cigarette and i will pay you, 2 euros for a cigarette, all good

went back to her gave the cigarette and we started talking, they tried to guess my age, 30...25..28...23

i asked them for their age and they turned out to be minors hahaha, both 17, the girl i approached is still 16 will turn 17 in two weeks

we talked a bit and asked for her number, she asked for instagram, i told her i don't have instagram so she doesent see my creepy autistic instagram


https://www.instagram.com/_momo_.d_/?ig ... Q4Mg%3D%3D

she gave her watsap, do you understand why i need to improve my instagram? @Squilliam it's not for "instagram game" with high status and lamborghini, i just need some pictures looking attractive, cool and socially calibrated, i'm in 200k, it's not about instragram "game", i'm not in miami, it's just that girls feel safe with instagram and use it like watsap

what a wild night man, getting 16 yo numbers at 35 hahahahah

Now some reflactions, my approach could be too aggressive and girls are forced to say no, two girls told me "if you can get me a cigarette we can talk" after saying no, within 15 minutes

so maybe the second girl wasent trying to make fun of me, maybe it's the equivalent of "if you ask like that i'm forced to say no, i want to talk and the cigarette excuse is a way to remove the pressur you've put on me"

another thing, the 4th girl, she was giving me some subtle...VERY subtle looks all night, the same type of looks that i was recieving from the girl who gave her number, like lateral looks so i don't notice, i can't be sure but if it's true i was too aggressive with the 4th girl too, she just had to say no.

I can't be 100% sure but 4th and 6th girl were giving me the same subtle eye contact all night, both said no, the 6th girl had to find a "solution" to say yes, the 4th girl couldn't

also there's another girl, not super hot but very cute, it's been two weeks of eye contact with her, i didn't approach not because i pussied out but because there's no need to, its a small club and she's a regular, let's see what happens building "confort", and by confort i mean she give me subtle looks, i don't act like a desperate, i go out every weekend and i become a "regular" too, let's see what happens when she feels safer and safer

what a fucking will life, i need a good instagram page ASAP, they ALL ask for instagram, they want to see that you're normal and they can't see that with watsap

no status no money bullshit, just an instagram page looking cute, well dressed, edgy, and normal

when i tried tinder a while ago girls asked for instagram anyway, the only reason i didn't have dates/sex is that i din't have ig and with two autistic pics they didn't trust me to give me watsap

also my house need cleaning and furniture

i have to stop with the pizza delivery bullshit job, it looks so weird at 35 and not enough money

i need money, a lot of money, i need to buy a car

now imagine i have a date with the crazy 17 yo girl, both she and friend like an older guy with a car so they can move from club to club and not be stuck, imagine the validation of having both of them in my car, and replicate the situation with other girls

time is running out, i will devolep wrinkles and grey hair and be too old for this shit, i have to do the work asap,

below i will attach a picture of the hairstyle i had, my general style, and a picture from watsap, the girl is the brunette on the right

any advice about hair and style is welcome
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pancakemouse
Posts: 1769 | Thanks: 1053
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Age: 33

Sat Jul 01, 2023 3:51 pm

Seems like an odd opener unless it's just an awkward translation. Can you clarify, are you literally saying possiamo conoscerci? It sounds like you're asking for too much when the girl doesn't even know you yet.

Instead try making eye contact, come in with a smirk and say: come va. If the girl isn't directly looking at you you can say ei, mi piace il tuo stile or something else about her that sticks out.

Hair is looking fantastic. YOU are looking fantastic. And you're getting out there. Now you just need to learn the fundamentals of calibration, comfort, and just having a normal chat instead of this intense "APPROACH" mindset.
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Thrice
Posts: 478 | Thanks: 296
Joined: Fri Apr 09, 2021 8:33 am
Name: Mohamed
Goal: get laid
Age: 32
Motto: GO GET SOMETHING FUCKING DONE
Location: Italy

Sat Jul 01, 2023 4:14 pm

pancakemouse wrote:
Sat Jul 01, 2023 3:51 pm
possiamo conoscerci?
Thank you Pancake!
exactly, possiamo conoscerci or ti va di conoscerci, almost same thing

i had eye contact with 4th and 6th girl but then i opned with that phrase, i approached the other ones while they were moving, so i still need another phrase for girls who are moving (some girls keep moving no stop the entire night), and i will adopt your suggestions with girls standing still talking with their friends
Looking for a hardcore accountability partner👇🏽

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pancakemouse
Posts: 1769 | Thanks: 1053
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Sat Jul 01, 2023 4:27 pm

Thrice wrote:
Sat Jul 01, 2023 4:14 pm
pancakemouse wrote:
Sat Jul 01, 2023 3:51 pm
possiamo conoscerci?
Thank you Pancake!
exactly, possiamo conoscerci or ti va di conoscerci, almost same thing

i had eye contact with 4th and 6th girl but then i opned with that phrase, i approached the other ones while they were moving, so i still need another phrase for girls who are moving (some girls keep moving no stop the entire night), and i will adopt your suggestions with girls standing still talking with their friends
With moving girls it's a difficult open but I'll typically use the "I like your style" line there. Tap them on the shoulder, say "excuse me" to get their attention, then once you have some eye contact deliver the line.

Important fact that doesn't get enough attention: approaching is WAY more than just about "saying a line". Body language, eye contact, timing all has to be on point.

Might be useful to read the post I just put up on breaking up the opener into 3 phases: https://pancakemouse.wordpress.com/2023 ... -3-phases/

Can't wait to see your progress. I'm chuffed that you've moved into the action-taking stage.
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natedawg
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Age: 35
Motto: Whatever you do, don't quit.

Sat Jul 01, 2023 5:40 pm

Good shit dude.

As for the ones who kept looking at you after opening them, I have a very simple theory that you still caught their eye because you were man enough to approach them. For that, they simply don't look at you the same as all the other men who never try. I think it's a good place to be. I'd take that any day over being invisible.
2023-2024 Goals

Year 1: Pg 1-42

"As long I don't quit, I can't lose." - Alex Hormozi

**Feeling lost/unmotivated? Read this:viewtopic.php?p=48007#p48007

** Trust in the process Andy laid out for me: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1279346/11913966
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