uh kind of another lolz day
- rest of the pizza from yesterday
- bigass chipotle burrito
- mexican coke
^definitely not enough calories
I started trying to do a session near the uni, but I have way too much AA again because I think everyone knows me (which isn't that far from the truth). I only got 2 approaches and I didn't even ask the 2nd one for her number after she declined my instadate because I was so soft.
Switched to the mall. It was alright at first, but I dipped real early because I'm too paranoid about security (see my Notable Approaches)
Trio (1 male, 2 female). Guy tells me I said the same thing to one of his friends. I'm like "oh really" and I continue with the approach and get an exchange. Later in the night when I'm chilling at home, we have this conversation. It goes into haram territory past this so I'm only posting this much lolz.
I run into a chick with a mask. Got declined. Later, I approach a chick sitting at a table studying and didn't recognize that it was the same chick with the mask from earlier (also she took off her jacket so I didn't recognize the clothing either). She tells me that I should go to church and socialize instead of calling girls cute at the mall. I dip from the mall after this re-approach because it was haram....(and I wasn't sure if I was gonna get reported to security. don't wanna get kicked out on my 2nd mall sesh lmao)
Did a little bit but not as much as I wanted to.
Spent the rest of the night finishing the song I wrote yesterday.
Much of my initial confidence from cold approach was from getting a lot of positive feedback from anyone I talked to about it irl, and even strangers. Also I had a tendency to get too excited about positive outcomes and failing to maintain a baseline. This means I took rejections that weren't just "oh sorry I have a boyfriend" too personally and it got me too demotivated. I remember 2 weeks ago I had a 4/~35 stretch of "aggressively unreceptive" girls and that got me way too down, even though I feel like when you have negative tilts, a streak of aggressively unreceptive girls is kinda normal.
The next step of growth for me is to really dial it back when I get positive outcomes, and live up to my motto that "rejection is mileage", and that includes "aggressive" rejections.
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