colgate - assume your childhood woes were your fault too

[Warlord]

BOYFRIEND GAME:

Chris from GLL (AA Program) and BoyToy spoke about it.

A method is keep going out and meeting women and in particular LOWER YOUR STANDARDS.

Women who know you are way better than them will be super nice to you.

Don't be surprised if they will bang you on the first date and even more to your benefit if they want to keep seeing you.

Just be prepared to play it slow, treat them nice (still be a strong leader) and bang them after a few dates.

Remember you can always upgrade.

Man I dated a model then did night game lowering my standards and banged A LOT of women then kept upgrading.

The main thing that holds guys back is the ego. Who cares. If you are still getting rejected keep lowering your standards then UPGRADE.

I went from dating a model to fat chicks (I didn't care I just wanted to bang as many as possible) and I kept upgrading.

I ended up banging those hot chicks who guys are too afraid to talk to and I attribute that to getting easy wins and upgrading.

Now I have a super hot chick and am still looking to upgrade.

Trust me when I tell you that women can sense if you can get women.

SUMMARY:

- LOWER YOUR STANDARDS.
- KEEP MEETING WOMEN.
- PLAY IT SLOW.
- KEEP THEM AROUND.
- KEEP MEETING WOMEN.
- UPGRADE.

On the other extreme is to go upto the hottest chick in the bar and tell her you are the hottest chick in this place (its from the How To Go Out Alone To Bars Program by GLL).

That will also give you confidence.

[colgate]

@Warlord

That sounds like an interesting idea, I'll think about it.

I think there is a certain niche of girls that are attracted to me if they know me (slightly chubby types), but I've always turned them down in the past when they make advances on me. I'll consider adding to my pool of girls I'm interested in hitting on when I go out.

That will also force me to hit on more girls, which is always a good thing.

[colgate]

Pretty frustrated today because I had shitty time management since I woke up late and talked with my roommate for like 3 hours, though we had a good conversation.

The 2 malls I wanted to go to both close at 6 on Sunday and they're across town, and since I ended up leaving my house at 4:30, I only went to the one I normally go to.

Here's a video log of what happened


I couldn't approach anyone in the mall. Granted there were mostly families and not too many people, esp girls, but I still pussed out on the 4 girls I would have been interested in.

Decided to drive to the park after pussing out at the mall. There was one girl with a group of friends that was pretty cute, so after about 2 minutes of standing around, I went back to them and hit on her. Said she wasn't interested.

Then I walked to the bridge and sat down and started reading other people's logs for some inspiration. I pussed out on maybe 2 or 3 girls, but I got the idea to head over to some grocery stores.

Went to a Walgreens and pussed out at 2 girls walking out, saw no other girls inside.

Went to a Publix and saw a cute Asian girl who was looking at the overhead signs facing me. I pussed out there, but I didn't want to give up. I saw her walking down some other aisle but then she was on the phone...ugh. Then I decided to try to track her, but I saw a few other cute girls, but totally ignored them because I had some stupid approach one-itis. Saw the girl at the register again and decided to wait outside, but I got startled because she "walked in a different direction than I thought she would".

At this point I started to try to mentally record every bullshit excuse my brain comes up with for not talking to a girl as they pass by. I feel like I need to be actively aware of it, and how silly and limiting they are so I can destroy them.

Saw a cute girl in a collar and red lipstick, "was walking with others in a group"

Saw a woman who smiled at me and said "hi how are you?", "was maybe a little older than I want" (she was maybe late 20s early 30s, which makes this total bullshit)

I was like laughing at my own retarded excuses as I headed over to Whole Foods for a hail mary. I did start saying "sup" and "hey how are you" to every person that was walking towards me, like that other woman did, because I feel like this would be a good habit to get into to potentially approach people, and I personally like when people do it to me. Greeting everyone walking towards me really makes me feel like I have more social freedom, and I'm not just existing in this world and being ashamed to be out.

That being said, I pussed out 2 more times at Whole Foods. Granted, Whole Foods was dead at 8 pm on a Sunday, but I still missed 2 opportunities.

Cute, slightly chubby staff lady, "looked like she was 'busy' with inventory"

Another Asian girl, was walking towards me, and I missed greeting her entirely because "I was pissed at not approaching the other girl"

Had one more miss on the street too.

Hopefully remembering my excuses and realizing how bullshit they are, and greeting everyone walking towards me will help me puss out less.

[colgate]

Mon 8/16/21:
- Laundry - washed/dried. need to put away
- Iron clothes - around 30% done, was doing it during pomodoro breaks, but i stopped doing it at some point
- Clean room - ehh. kinda started doing it but fell asleep. I've been going to the gym MWF at 4:30am for about a month, but I might quit going so early because I want to prioritize going out. I tend to naturally fall asleep around midnight lately, and there's still stuff to do at around 8-9pm when I should be going to bed if I'm working out at 4:30am, so I'll experiment with going later now.
- Learn about DSLR - consulted my roommate who is a photographer to help me out, but apparently my used nikon d50's shutter button doesn't work and it has a CHA error, so I'm probably gonna return it and just order online from Andy's tinder guide
- Eat breakfast in 1 hour - 1h7m
- Work distraction-free for 4 hours - 8 sets of 25/5 pomodoros. got distracted for 30 mins on set 7
- Approach 1 girl
- Eat dinner in 1 hour if I approach - actually ate dinner (since I approached), but got distracted on my phone too much and took 2h20m. Need to start putting phone away when eating.
- Swipe on Tinder


Gonna start with 1 girl and increase by 1 a day.

[colgate]

Really did NOT want to go out today, I was already frustrated that I had to go out, cursing at my contacts that wouldn't stick in my eyes.

Knowing that I had a negative mindset already walking out the door, I put on Andy's podcast "Day 336: You don't have to SUFFER to reach your goals" for motivation and guidance, since I really felt like I was suffering and I needed someone to tell me to enjoy it.

Parked my car in the lot and meditated for a bit to ground myself and then walked out.

I intended to hit on a girl at the Whole Foods but there was literally no one under 40 years old for some reason. This really pissed me off, and to make things worse, it started getting super cloudy and drizzling. I knew that there would probably be some people walking around still so I didn't bail yet.

I complimented a chick on her neon green shirt, and cheered on a female jogger (not approaches, I just like doing this and want to start doing it more).

There were really a few people, but I still pussed out on 2 girls. I thought, let me at least maybe try to do a rep of AA Day 6, so I asked some group of people what the time was. A woman answered, but when I started to ask for directions, a dude started answering me, so that's a failure.

To make things worse, a cute jogger chick came up to the crosswalk too, but my balls bounced into the street and I "couldn't" hit on her in front of that group I just did the AA drill with.

Then I decided to actually scope out that new mall I meant to check out yesterday, and made this video log out of frustration


Started pouring hard while I was driving and I thought to head home but I was like nah dude, you can't fucking leave now, you've not done shit. So I drove on to that mall anyway.

Sat in my car for 30 mins complaining about living in this small ass city, wishing I could be back in Nashville. Even entertained the idea of renting another place up there...

I joined a bunch of Meetup events in a frenzy, hoping to meet more people.

I entered the mall and it was fucking DEAD. It was Monday at 7:30pm, and there were literally 5 people. There was 1 girl at a Piercing Pagoda I could have approached with anything (even an AA rep) but I flaked there too.

Then I was like "well I drove all the way up here, tf am I gonna do now?" There was a TJ Maxx so I walked in and scoped it out. Saw a really pretty but slightly chubby girl, but I honestly thought she was adorable. BUT I PUSSED OUT AGAIN.

Walked out, and went to a neighboring ROSS, no one.

I went to my car thinking, maybe I'll go to some bar and chill and meet someone. But then I thought, "am I really going to drive back 20 minutes and waste even more time because I literally can't take 2 minutes to walk back into TJ Maxx and talk to that girl?" I also remembered I made a deal to myself again that I would miss dinner if I didn't approach ONE girl today...was I really going to sacrifice my gains for a second day in a row? Finally my rationalization worked for me instead of against me and I marched right back into TJ Maxx.

Yet, I spent another eternity standing around and "looking at soaps", until I was like dude go the fuck up to her...so I did. I was a bit awkward but here's how it went

me: "hey sorry to interrupt you working but I just wanted to tell you something......[long pause for eternity]...i thought you're really pretty and i wanted to let you know that. what's your name?"
her: "oh thank you! it's ----"
me: "oh nice to meet you" *shake hands*
me: "i know you're busy and i gotta go too so i was wondering if i could get your number"

So she ended up giving me her number which was cool.

Made this second video log because I was so fucking excited to eat dinner and end my shitty start of the day on a good note


I texted her about an hour later after I got home to make plans to meet at the boba tea shop, but she said "she's packed for the next couple of weeks", which just seems like an excuse to not meet. I replied anyway saying that we can meet for like 30 mins, but I don't think she'll reply back.

I'm just happy that I finally just fucking approached her and I'm now eating one of the best dinners of my life. I'm really glad I'm committed to going out every day even if I feel like shit or feel negative.

For now, I think I'll stick with 1 approach a day. I'd like to reduce the amount of time it takes me to do it, since it took me around 3 hours today. When it's less of a big deal for me to do 1 approach, I'll increase it. AA reps will be on the backburner if I need to get myself in the mood to approach more.

[colgate]

Tue 8/17/21:
- Clean room
- Finish ironing clothes - bad time management, woke up late
- Put clothes away
- Eat breakfast in 1 hour - kinda? I nibbled away while working
- Work distraction-free for 4 hours - 6/8 pomodoros, want to sleep lol
- Eat dinner in 1 hour - ~30m. no phone at the table trick worked
- Return faulty DSLR
- Order new DSLR online - spent about $450 getting Andy's Nikon D7000 and lens recommendations

Screenshot_20210818-002338-884.png

- Approach 1 girl in <3 hours of going out - probably like 5-10 mins lol
- Swipe on tinder

[colgate]

Short post, cuz it took me a short time to approach lol


Went to Target, saw a girl/guy duo a couple times. Probably within 2 minutes of tracking them down, I approached.

me: "hey I don't know if y'all are dating, but I just wanted to say you're really hot"
girl: *giggles* "thanks!"
guy: "nah man, we're just friends, but yo man that's dope" *gives me a handshake*

I asked if she was free this week to meet up (I wanna try making plans on the spot if I can now), but she said she was gonna be leaving in a few days. Pushed for her number anyway (turns out it was an out of state area code), but she was really hot so I'm gonna text her to see if she's down anyway later.

Afterwards I went to the mall to maybe get a #2 but eh I didn't see anyone I actually wanted to hit on so I just bought some more clothes and shoes and called it.

Will do 1 approach tomorrow to average out my feelings and then bump it up to 2 on Thursday.

[colgate]

Wed 8/18/21:
- Gym
- Breakfast in 1 hour - >2h. talking with my roommate again. might actually start eating out or something for breakfast once i run out of food since I feel like I eat faster going out
- Work distraction-free for 4 hours - literally did no work, was on phone too much
- Finish ironing clothes - ditto
- Put clothes away - ditto
- Approach 1 girl, quickly (like Tuesday), attempt to make plans on the spot - approached quickly, forgot to make plans on the spot, but got a number
- Dinner in 1 hour - N/A, decided to eat dinner at board game night

[goldfish]

Kudos to you for approaching a guy/girl duo, that's pretty ballsy. Keep up the good work!

--Edit-- I just saw that you're counting how many approaches you've pussied out on? I don't think there's a point to doing this. You should be focusing on the successes rather than failures, especially since you've just started approaching.

Either way I'm sure that soon enough you'll be able to do 10+ approaches a day pretty easily.

[colgate]

I just saw that you're counting how many approaches you've pussied out on? I don't think there's a point to doing this. You should be focusing on the successes rather than failures, especially since you've just started approaching.

it's an analogue for how people do like "1 for 7" when they approach 7 girls and only get one number. I'm not yet at a stage where I actually care about getting numbers (although I'm actually 3 for 6 on getting numbers so far), but I might add that in my signature at some point.

I love numbers and what they mean and remembering and recording even girls I pussy out on somehow gives me an incentive *not* to pussy out (by keeping the approach:pussy out ratio low). But maybe I'll remove it at some point when I feel it won't help me anymore.

[Toast]

That is a ballsy approach. Props man. I haven't done something like that yet

Trying to set up a date on the spot or figuring out when they are free is also a good thing to do. I generally scope out when they're free next after I exchange. No guarantee they're actually free tho.

You should be focusing on the successes rather than failures,

100% agree. Every approach, regardless of the outcome, is a success. getting a number doesn't matter. It is the approach itself that is important. Sexual outcomes are inevitable if you approach in high volume. So focusing in the approach is what is most important. Rather then being outcome oriented.

I love numbers and what they mean and remembering and recording even girls I pussy out on somehow gives me an incentive *not* to pussy out (by keeping the approach:pussy out ratio low). But maybe I'll remove it at some point when I feel it won't help me anymore.

I was like this in the beginning. As a beginner you do wanna remember everything. But once you start to get more of a feel for approaching and some more experience. Numbers matter less and just getting into the approach mindset and trying to maximize encounters is what is more important then numbers.

You will get there eventually if u keep plugging away at it.

[colgate]

Hit on a girl walking on the Stairmaster at the gym. Then her mom showed up and she was like "I'm here with my mom".

I said "sup" to her mom and still got her number anyway lol.

Totally forgot to try to make plans on the spot though

[colgate]

Felt really complacent and distracted for the rest of the day. It's almost like hitting on girls and getting a positive reaction is just some dopamine rush, even if they end up not responding to my text later.

I went to a "Board Game Night" that I found on Meetup, and it was good to just interact with people. Was able to leave on my own terms this time instead of hanging around for too long until things got awkward, so that's an improvement.

tbh, I'm probably not gonna sign up for more Meetups for now though, I feel like it's a distraction from my approaching goals and I already have poor time management. It would be cool to have local friends but I think I need to prioritize getting laid right now.

People still think I look small though, I've been hustling at the gym but I know this just takes time.

Gonna try to actually get some work done now.

[colgate]

Thu 8/19/21:
- Work distraction-free for 4 hours - 3/8 pomodoros. really starting to dislike work, i need better time management in general
- Breakfast in 1 hour
- Approach 2 girls
- Finish ironing clothes - finally lol. starved myself of dinner until i did this. had to rewash my clothes because they got a bit mildewy from being wet (i wet iron my clothes)
- Put clothes away
- Dinner in 1 hour

I keep sleeping for like 10-11 hours for some reason. Maybe I'm paying off sleep debt or something. I've been able to go to bed around midnight but I keep waking up around 11am.

I read https://kyil-extra.com/sleep-is-paramount/ and bought some things from there to potentially help me out

Screenshot_20210819-113721-796.png

Blue light goggles and a wakelight. Hopefully these will help control my oversleeping and undersleeping days.

[colgate]

Went to Target again to hit on girls, but I ended up just buying some personal items, and also making some bullshit excuse that I "didn't want to hit on white girls".

Called myself a racist pussy and drove to the mall. I decided to make sure I was not going to buy anything and focus on hitting on girls, which seemed to work.

1 - latina. was wearing a mask but I could tell she was smiling when I called her pretty. shook her hand, but then she told me she had a boyfriend.
2 - white girl with glasses/mixed black+white duo. hit on the white girl. they were kinda walking but i called her cute and they both giggled as they walked away. i was walking away too but i was like "wait, i didn't finish that...". went back up to them and tried an instadate but she declined. handed her my phone and she put in her number. her friend complimented my outfit which was cool.

quick pic of said outfit:

IMG_20210819_203734203~2.jpg