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oscarcma
Posts: 4 | Thanks: 3
Joined: Thu Apr 07, 2022 12:44 am
Goal: Get better matches
Age: 37
Motto: Grow Don't Change
Location: Boston

Wed May 31, 2023 1:47 pm

I am struggling mightily to get matches on Tinder. I know there's a lot of improvement to be made, but damn I figured I'd at least get a decent match once every other week or so..as it is I'm only matching with overweight women and moderately attractive immigrants with less than stellar English skills. And these matches are pretty infrequent. Only one or two a week.

In person I'm way ahead of online. If i can get a girl to sit across from me and I'm attracted to her there's a 75% chance I'm getting laid, and a fair number of those I can convert to short term FWB arrangements.

I've had a lot of luck getting matches/dates/lays on Seeking Arrangements. I'd say I've been on 30 dates and more than 20 lays over the past year, almost exclusively from Seeking. I'm tired of the $110 monthly fee and want to focus on my Tinder/Hinge game though.

Other relevant facts, 37yo and I'm in a major metro area in the Northern US, so the mayches are out there.

I'm cycling through these trying to see if any set does better than the others. I can't discern any patterns. What's the deal?
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Squilliam
Posts: 2060 | Thanks: 361
Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2021 12:57 am
Goal: Be happy
Age: 24
Motto: Pain is temporary. Greatness lasts forever

Wed May 31, 2023 2:17 pm

I'm not an expert so I'll let others comment in more detail, but I can spot a few issues with these. The first thing is that your facial expressions & poses seem very uncomfortable and forced in a lot of these pictures. It's clear you posed for a photo, and your body language appears quite stiff in a lot of them.

The second woodworking one could maybe work as a hobby photo, but the others likely won't work. I'm also not sure how I feel about the flannel. Your fashion in the woodworking photo looks okay but it definitely is generic. But if you're just starting out with looksmaxxing efforts then I don't think that will be the main thing holding you back.

Also, I can see you holding the remote in the photo in front of the house. Definitely not something you want either. Don't take photos by yourself IMO. I've done the same thing and honestly unless you're really skilled with photography I wouldn't recommend it. I saved a lot more time and effort getting a professional shoot or even just going out with a friend.

To be honest you very much give me nice guy vibes. It would probably be better to look into adding some edge to your appearance and style, I mean, assuming your goal is to get laid. But this is something I struggle with myself so I don't really have too much specific advice other than things like tattoos and piercings lol. But then again, I think a lot of being perceived that way is also about your body language and the way you present yourself.
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Adrizzle
Posts: 492 | Thanks: 176
Joined: Wed Nov 24, 2021 2:41 am
Goal: Take Action
Age: 32

Wed May 31, 2023 3:59 pm

The expressions on your first ones are not great you look afraid. I’d run without thos


Get a new Mai. And maybe and other activity photo
Also are you paying for apps? Most the guys killing it are paying. In fact OLD today is pay to play
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Zug
Posts: 661 | Thanks: 354
Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2021 5:43 pm
Goal: Find a wife
Age: 41
Motto: Strength before weakness

Wed May 31, 2023 4:16 pm

I like the photos a lot as far as they're visually interesting, well taken, and great detail. There is high contrast and they grab attention.
You're in good shape and have good skin, and your face is attractive, but your facial+body expressions are horrific, the haircut and facial hair need work too.

Your body language and facial expressions are ruining these photos. You're giving off serial killer molester energy in these pics. It looks like you took most of these yourself, I'd retry and take some while in motion, smile harder, take an insane number of shots and try to find a couple where the body language is better.
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Mindset
Posts: 135 | Thanks: 16
Joined: Mon Jan 02, 2023 2:15 pm
Goal: Get laid & retain
Age: 28
Motto: The grass is greener where you water it
Location: The Netherlands

Wed May 31, 2023 4:29 pm

oscarcma wrote:
Wed May 31, 2023 1:47 pm
I am struggling mightily to get matches on Tinder. I know there's a lot of improvement to be made, but damn I figured I'd at least get a decent match once every other week or so..as it is I'm only matching with overweight women and moderately attractive immigrants with less than stellar English skills. And these matches are pretty infrequent. Only one or two a week.

In person I'm way ahead of online. If i can get a girl to sit across from me and I'm attracted to her there's a 75% chance I'm getting laid, and a fair number of those I can convert to short term FWB arrangements.

I've had a lot of luck getting matches/dates/lays on Seeking Arrangements. I'd say I've been on 30 dates and more than 20 lays over the past year, almost exclusively from Seeking. I'm tired of the $110 monthly fee and want to focus on my Tinder/Hinge game though.

Other relevant facts, 37yo and I'm in a major metro area in the Northern US, so the mayches are out there.

I'm cycling through these trying to see if any set does better than the others. I can't discern any patterns. What's the deal?
Hey dude, first of all, welcome to the forums!

In general,I like your facial hair, jeans coat and plaid shirt combo in the pics and accessories.

Going through your pictures, this is what I can find:

Your first two portrait pictures give me majorly uncomfortable vibes, in large part due to you keeping your eyes wide the fuck open for some reason.

The third photo in front of the mirror with your two friends seems to be cool. Wouldn't use it in your first three photos or girls would have to play the guessing game at who you are.

The fourth picture you're covering your face with the sunglasses and your hair with the hat, which I'm not a big fan of. This could be any other dude in your place.

The fifth picture you're giving me the uncomfortable eyes wide the fuck open stare again

The sixth picture I like as it shows you doing one of your hobbies, improvement point could be you looking at something in the distance (in a candid way) so the girls can see your face.

The seventh picture, I like this one, a serious look on you and I would use it as your first picture among the pics you're using right now. It seems more relaxed and candid than the others and I can see your face

The eight picture seems like a more uncomfortable version of the seventh so I would rather you use the seventh one.

In the ninth and tenth you're not giving me the eyes wide the fuck open, but you do seem uncomfortable.

Here's my advice:
Practice taking some more picture (maybe with a friend) where you're more relaxed, maybe while talking to that friend.
You probably don't recognize yourself making ''strange'' expressions as you're not very experienced at pictures, I'm currently getting out of this phase as we speak.

If you want a short term fix, try downloading Faceapp and see if you can change the facial expression in some of these photos.
If you want a long term fix (I reccomend this) read this article by The Paparazzi Factor about taking candid shots
And practice taking some more pictures to get it right I'm assuming you've read THE BIBLE so I'll leave that out.

Also, I don't think your main issue is the way you look or dress (which seems to be fine) but your picture expressions.
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pancakemouse
Posts: 1768 | Thanks: 1052
Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2021 4:14 pm
Goal: Master cold approach
Age: 33

Wed May 31, 2023 6:23 pm

Watching and implementing this should be your #1 priority:
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MILFandCookies
Posts: 1207 | Thanks: 588
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Thu Jun 01, 2023 9:48 pm

pancakemouse wrote:
Wed May 31, 2023 6:23 pm
Watching and implementing this should be your #1 priority:
Seconded. I teach this to all my clients.

There's scientific data to show this matters specifically for online dating too.

The Indian guy from Simple Pickup (Jesse) made a course in 2020 called Endless Options. In it he shares a lot of testing he did on what matters in dating profile pics. He found the squinch to be very predictive of a positive response from women.

In your photos, your eyes are wide open, and your forhead is wrinkled. This makes you look scared or confused. When you get the squinch down, you'll look confident and determined instead.
I've helped > 100 guys get laid on dating apps.
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Method
Posts: 50 | Thanks: 13
Joined: Sun Sep 18, 2022 5:51 pm
Goal: Build a Career
Age: 29
Motto: This Is What Hard Feels Like
Location: Wisconsin

Fri Jun 02, 2023 12:08 am

That first woodworking one stood out to me, looks like you are relaxed doing something you enjoy.
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oscarcma
Posts: 4 | Thanks: 3
Joined: Thu Apr 07, 2022 12:44 am
Goal: Get better matches
Age: 37
Motto: Grow Don't Change
Location: Boston

Fri Jun 02, 2023 5:36 pm

The squench it is. Thanks guys.

I did a basic redo of my main face pic with a bad squench attempt and already saw a marked improvement in match rate. Still not where I want it, but I went from a handful or matches a week to a handful a day.

Just need to practice the squench until I nail it and then redo all my photos. No biggie.
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MILFandCookies
Posts: 1207 | Thanks: 588
Joined: Wed Sep 16, 2020 12:29 am
Name: Joe
Goal: $10k+/month
Age: 31
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Location: Austin, TX/World
Contact:

Fri Jun 02, 2023 7:25 pm

oscarcma wrote:
Fri Jun 02, 2023 5:36 pm
The squench it is. Thanks guys.

I did a basic redo of my main face pic with a bad squench attempt and already saw a marked improvement in match rate. Still not where I want it, but I went from a handful or matches a week to a handful a day.

Just need to practice the squench until I nail it and then redo all my photos. No biggie.
Yup yup. Imho the way Peter Hurley describes it in his video makes it unecessarily confusing.

The way I like to teach clients is this:

1) stand in front of a mirror
2) slowly squint until it looks like you're squinting (wrinkles on your brow, between your eyes, eyes too narrow etc.)
3) back off slowly until you look determined but not squinting
4) profit

Hope that makes it easier.
I've helped > 100 guys get laid on dating apps.
📸🔥 Dating App Photographer - I'll get you laid, click here: https://www.DatingUnchained.com/ 🔥📸

P.S. I don't like MILFs, just the name ;)

Goal 1:
• Build + maintain $10k+ profit/month

Goal 2:
• Cut some fat to get abs again
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