Seeing a girl with a troubled sexual past.

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Sin Silver
Posts: 227 | Thanks: 109
Joined: Tue Jun 30, 2020 9:03 pm
Name: Silver
Goal: Build a career
Age: 34
Motto: You're responsible for your own happiness
Location: UK

Thu Sep 03, 2020 11:34 am

So I met a girl last weekend. Date went really well, she was really aggressive when we made out but when I suggested to go to hers, she said she 'wasn't ready'. I was kinda disappointed at first, but I've invited her to come around mine this weekend. She said she wanted to, but was worried she couldn't offer me everything I wanted. I decide to push to find out what she meant, and thankfully shed opened up.

I don't know all the details, but it sounds like she experienced sexual assault 8 years ago. She hasn't had sex since then, and is reluctant to get physical with other people. On top of that she recently had an operation and is under going physio, which is going to make penetrative sex hard. Despite that, she still said she found me 'irresistible' and wanted to spend time with me

I told her that I would till be glad for her to come over and we'd do stuff, but only what she is comfortable with. I've been on the BDSM scene long enough to have my own hard principles on consent, as well as the ability to observe when someone is and isn't comfortable.

I do like this girl, but on top of the sexual stuff, I felt she is getting to emotionally attached to me at this early stage. I'm kinda worried that if I sleep with her, she is going to get to attached, but I do kinda like her, and I'd feel like a twat bailing after everything she has shared with me.Obviously, apart of me really wants to sleep with her, but I also want to make sure I leave her better than I found her, and be a positive influence on her.

Any input/advice would be appreciated.
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Lostcause
Posts: 586 | Thanks: 173
Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2020 1:23 pm
Goal: New toys
Age: 23

Thu Sep 03, 2020 12:01 pm

I could avoid it if I had other opportunities (read. other girls). Fixing other people is not easy and can hurt both her, and you in the process. It's especially true for this kind of issues (sexual assault sounds quite serious).

If you decide to give her a chance, be blunt honest with her, bhe will vulnerable and will probably attach easily.

Disclaimer - I am not expert in fixing other people, so it this post as opinion, not advise.
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