Brandon’s 365 Days of Masculine, Self-affirming Action: Days 278-283
- Manly Cockfellow
- Posts: 449 | Thanks: 358
- Joined: Sun Jan 09, 2022 8:14 pm
- Goal: Become the men I fear
- Age: 37
- Motto: Mk no smll plans; thy hv no pwr to stir mens blood
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
Day 91
Actions taken:
Munch went really well. People are having a great time and making friends. While it was happening I noticed two girls who were not part of our group sitting a couple tables away. They had looked over at our massive group in the corner a couple times. One was a hot blonde in short skirt and low cut shirt. I made the excuse in my head that I needed to tend to the munch. That was bullshit. I would have liked to approached her. Could have leveraged the status. Oh well. Onward.
Actions taken:
- Affirmations
- 2nd meditation in the afternoon
- Led my munch
Munch went really well. People are having a great time and making friends. While it was happening I noticed two girls who were not part of our group sitting a couple tables away. They had looked over at our massive group in the corner a couple times. One was a hot blonde in short skirt and low cut shirt. I made the excuse in my head that I needed to tend to the munch. That was bullshit. I would have liked to approached her. Could have leveraged the status. Oh well. Onward.
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
- Manly Cockfellow
- Posts: 449 | Thanks: 358
- Joined: Sun Jan 09, 2022 8:14 pm
- Goal: Become the men I fear
- Age: 37
- Motto: Mk no smll plans; thy hv no pwr to stir mens blood
You are a tattooed, well-dressed, super strong and fit savant with a harem, are quickly becoming a legend in one of the biggest BDSM communities in the US, are building a startup that will save the world, and are literally preaching to your sex cult right in front of two hotties but still can't approach... what hope do the rest of us have!?Bman wrote: ↑Tue Mar 07, 2023 11:51 amMunch went really well. People are having a great time and making friends. While it was happening I noticed two girls who were not part of our group sitting a couple tables away. They had looked over at our massive group in the corner a couple times. One was a hot blonde in short skirt and low cut shirt. I made the excuse in my head that I needed to tend to the munch. That was bullshit. I would have liked to approached her. Could have leveraged the status. Oh well. Onward.
Just kidding, this game is wonderful because you get infinite tries
(as long as you don't quit)
It's also awesome because it seems to be a hurdle everyone struggles with, which means both that we are not alone, and that when we do hop it we splash down in a sea of pussy with almost no competition
You got this @Bman, you're worried about getting over that hurdle now, but I guarantee in the not too distant future you're main worry will be how to avoid drowning
My Log
viewtopic.php?p=40177#p40177
viewtopic.php?p=40177#p40177
- natedawg
- Posts: 879 | Thanks: 221
- Joined: Sun Aug 28, 2022 11:45 pm
- Goal: Social Life
- Age: 35
- Motto: Whatever you do, don't quit.
I agree with this. Every time I miss an approach attempt, I remind myself that I get infinite tries. It does wonders for my psyche & feelings of abundance.Manly Cockfellow wrote: ↑Tue Mar 07, 2023 2:26 pmJust kidding, this game is wonderful because you get infinite tries
(as long as you don't quit)
Don't sweat it too much because you have many more coming your way.
2023-2024 Goals
Year 1: Pg 1-42
"As long I don't quit, I can't lose." - Alex Hormozi
**Feeling lost/unmotivated? Read this:viewtopic.php?p=48007#p48007
** Trust in the process Andy laid out for me: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1279346/11913966
Year 1: Pg 1-42
"As long I don't quit, I can't lose." - Alex Hormozi
**Feeling lost/unmotivated? Read this:viewtopic.php?p=48007#p48007
** Trust in the process Andy laid out for me: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1279346/11913966
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
Day 92
Actions taken:
Actions taken:
- Affirmations
- 2nd meditation in the afternoon
- Men's Group
- Ended things with Ad Girl
- 1 Cold approach
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
This made me laugh. What a great reframe to think about in the moment. Thanks, Manly.Manly Cockfellow wrote: ↑Tue Mar 07, 2023 2:26 pmYou are a tattooed, well-dressed, super strong and fit savant with a harem, are quickly becoming a legend in one of the biggest BDSM communities in the US, are building a startup that will save the world, and are literally preaching to your sex cult right in front of two hotties but still can't approach... what hope do the rest of us have!?
I think it's a feeling that never really leaves. You just get more resilient and better equipped to overcoming the hurdle. Like yesterday, I had the same feelings arise, but was able to more quickly get over them.
Exactly what I've started telling myself after I skip one, rather than lamenting on "I should have approached". The one at the munch though I wanted to note to call out my own bullshit so I was more ready for the approaches the rest of the week.
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
Day 93
Actions taken:
SXSW is starting this weekend. Luckily my Friday night is currently open. I just moved Psychedelic Girl to Monday so she can also come out to my munch, so now I have some time Saturday also. Planning on banging out multiple approaches on those days.
Actions taken:
- Affirmations
- 2nd meditation in the afternoon
- 1 Cold approach
SXSW is starting this weekend. Luckily my Friday night is currently open. I just moved Psychedelic Girl to Monday so she can also come out to my munch, so now I have some time Saturday also. Planning on banging out multiple approaches on those days.
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
Day 94
Actions taken:
Also, just grateful today I got a new fridge. Mine has been out for a week and I've had to go buy ice everyday to keep my food from going bad. You sometimes forget how wonderful our modern day convivences are until you don't have them. So pretty grateful for that.
Actions taken:
- Affirmations
- 2nd meditation in the afternoon
Also, just grateful today I got a new fridge. Mine has been out for a week and I've had to go buy ice everyday to keep my food from going bad. You sometimes forget how wonderful our modern day convivences are until you don't have them. So pretty grateful for that.
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
Day 95
Actions taken:
Although I've never done something like this, I'm just taking it all one step at a time. I'm allowing others to help as they volunteer and delegating out responsibility. I feel confident I'll figure out each thing as I go.
Next steps are to build a landing page for event info, get the event on Fet, secure performers, and start selling tickets.
Fucking wild.
Actions taken:
- Affirmations
- 2nd meditation in the afternoon
- Booked event venue & bought event insurance
Although I've never done something like this, I'm just taking it all one step at a time. I'm allowing others to help as they volunteer and delegating out responsibility. I feel confident I'll figure out each thing as I go.
Next steps are to build a landing page for event info, get the event on Fet, secure performers, and start selling tickets.
Fucking wild.
- 1 Cold approach
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
- AskTheDom
- Posts: 1265 | Thanks: 550
- Joined: Sat Jun 04, 2022 7:16 am
- Name: Mario
- Goal: Coach
- Age: 38
- Motto: Alea iacta est
Damn man. I am fucking impressed
*removes The Dom's legendary hat*
Mario "The Dom" Tubone
Your Dominance coach - I help Men becoming more confident and competent both inside and outside the bedroom
MY WEEKLY PODCAST: https://rb.gy/8u2e1z
Your Dominance coach - I help Men becoming more confident and competent both inside and outside the bedroom
MY WEEKLY PODCAST: https://rb.gy/8u2e1z
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
Day 96
Actions taken:
1. Got off bus, walked a block, seen her across the street about to stop to look at a clothes rack. Knew I couldn't skip or else I'd set the session of on the wrong tone. Good 3 or 4 min convo. She was a bit nervous. Grabbed her number, texted her right there, and she checked her phone to see if she got it. She accidently put in the wrong number in my phone and said "Oh my god... that's so embarrassing I get nervous talking to strangers." Got the real number, and she texted herself from my phone.
Lessons Learned: Convo could have been more sexual and at one point I felt my hand go to touch her elbow, but I stopped myself. Need to just let my body relax and do as it pleases. Also that's going to be my standard now to always text her right then and there.
2. About 5-10 mins later, few blocks away. Nice semi formal dress. Waiting at the cross walk. Came up beside her to open. We stood there chatting a bit, then started walking. Halfway through the intersection she told me shes married and going to meet her husband for dinner. Ejected at the other side of the street.
3. About 20 mins later. Cute latina with tattoos and dyed hair sitting down at the corner on a planter on her phone. Got initially intimidated because she was good looking. Approached anyways but tone was off from being unconfident in the set. Boyfriend rejection.
4. Really long time before this one and my feet were getting tired so I just stood in a crowd to watch passersbys. Seen a hot curly haired blonde with a sunhat, tiny top with midriff showing, and short skirt slowly walking, hips swaying, just enjoying herself. Walked up beside her, passed her a bit so she seen me, then looked over at her and opened. Very friendly and warm. Had her laughing a bit. Had mentioned my hometown in WA and when she said "Oh yeah, I know of it" and I was surprised because most have not. So unintentionally called her out on it. She then got nervous, I teased her, we laughed. We stopped at the corner of the street after slowly walking together there. I was about to close when she told me she was going to the Coconut Bar with "those guys" and points behind me at two guys standing there. I was talking with her on that corner for a good minute, so they must have just been watching me. Anyways, I got caught off guard so I ejected.
Lessons Learned: When I seen her I told myself that a hotter girl was not going to be any hard than the last three I just approached, so just do it. That was good. Calling her on her shit and being confident in myself was good. Had I got 30 more seconds I think I would have number closed. In hindsight I could have tried going to the Coconut Bar with them and kept working the set. Could have still taken a shot for the number. Either way, I just didn't feel ready to game them and her as I don't have experience with that yet. Was kicking myself on it though because she was a real hottie and I felt like the set was going really well. Oh well, there will be another and I'll do well there, too.
Last note on the session. I do FAR better in both approach anxiety and actually conversing with them if they are stationary or slowly walking. The ones that are walking quickly down the street I feel I do poor with. Which means I can work better on my stop.
Really enjoyed this weekly challenge. Just what I needed to kick my ass in gear with these.
-----------------
I wouldn't be impressed, yet. Only partially the way there. Plenty of time for things to go sideways (though that's unlikely.)
However, if everything goes well, I'll be 10x more confident about doing these. Which means the ones after will be even better. And then when I start travelling the U.S. I'll have the knowledge to be able to come into any city and do the same thing. So one day there might be a whole network of these started by me.
But let's just focus on one step at a time here.
Actions taken:
- Affirmations
- 2nd meditation in the afternoon
- 4 approaches bringing me to 7/7 for the weekly challenge
1. Got off bus, walked a block, seen her across the street about to stop to look at a clothes rack. Knew I couldn't skip or else I'd set the session of on the wrong tone. Good 3 or 4 min convo. She was a bit nervous. Grabbed her number, texted her right there, and she checked her phone to see if she got it. She accidently put in the wrong number in my phone and said "Oh my god... that's so embarrassing I get nervous talking to strangers." Got the real number, and she texted herself from my phone.
Lessons Learned: Convo could have been more sexual and at one point I felt my hand go to touch her elbow, but I stopped myself. Need to just let my body relax and do as it pleases. Also that's going to be my standard now to always text her right then and there.
2. About 5-10 mins later, few blocks away. Nice semi formal dress. Waiting at the cross walk. Came up beside her to open. We stood there chatting a bit, then started walking. Halfway through the intersection she told me shes married and going to meet her husband for dinner. Ejected at the other side of the street.
3. About 20 mins later. Cute latina with tattoos and dyed hair sitting down at the corner on a planter on her phone. Got initially intimidated because she was good looking. Approached anyways but tone was off from being unconfident in the set. Boyfriend rejection.
4. Really long time before this one and my feet were getting tired so I just stood in a crowd to watch passersbys. Seen a hot curly haired blonde with a sunhat, tiny top with midriff showing, and short skirt slowly walking, hips swaying, just enjoying herself. Walked up beside her, passed her a bit so she seen me, then looked over at her and opened. Very friendly and warm. Had her laughing a bit. Had mentioned my hometown in WA and when she said "Oh yeah, I know of it" and I was surprised because most have not. So unintentionally called her out on it. She then got nervous, I teased her, we laughed. We stopped at the corner of the street after slowly walking together there. I was about to close when she told me she was going to the Coconut Bar with "those guys" and points behind me at two guys standing there. I was talking with her on that corner for a good minute, so they must have just been watching me. Anyways, I got caught off guard so I ejected.
Lessons Learned: When I seen her I told myself that a hotter girl was not going to be any hard than the last three I just approached, so just do it. That was good. Calling her on her shit and being confident in myself was good. Had I got 30 more seconds I think I would have number closed. In hindsight I could have tried going to the Coconut Bar with them and kept working the set. Could have still taken a shot for the number. Either way, I just didn't feel ready to game them and her as I don't have experience with that yet. Was kicking myself on it though because she was a real hottie and I felt like the set was going really well. Oh well, there will be another and I'll do well there, too.
Last note on the session. I do FAR better in both approach anxiety and actually conversing with them if they are stationary or slowly walking. The ones that are walking quickly down the street I feel I do poor with. Which means I can work better on my stop.
Really enjoyed this weekly challenge. Just what I needed to kick my ass in gear with these.
-----------------
Thank you good sir.
I wouldn't be impressed, yet. Only partially the way there. Plenty of time for things to go sideways (though that's unlikely.)
However, if everything goes well, I'll be 10x more confident about doing these. Which means the ones after will be even better. And then when I start travelling the U.S. I'll have the knowledge to be able to come into any city and do the same thing. So one day there might be a whole network of these started by me.
But let's just focus on one step at a time here.
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
- bonzo34
- Posts: 468 | Thanks: 87
- Joined: Mon Jan 10, 2022 2:33 am
- Name: Alex
- Goal: 50 "made love"
- Age: 28
- Location: San Antonio TX
..
Last edited by bonzo34 on Sun Dec 10, 2023 6:09 am, edited 1 time in total.
dating
resolve job/income
Be an Army Officer
50 lays. 1/50
The first time you quit, it's hard. The second time, it gets easier. The third time, you don't even have to think about it.
be transparent as possible. Stop setting plays. Stop playing chess with life.
you make progress when you face a fear head on
resolve job/income
Be an Army Officer
50 lays. 1/50
The first time you quit, it's hard. The second time, it gets easier. The third time, you don't even have to think about it.
be transparent as possible. Stop setting plays. Stop playing chess with life.
you make progress when you face a fear head on
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
Day 97
Actions taken:
Actions taken:
- Affirmations
- 2nd meditation in the afternoon
- Sunday selfcare day
Tried setting date yesterday. The days we're free are opposite of each other and shes taking a vacation at the end of the week. I'll try after she gets back, but obviously the chances will be low.Bman wrote: ↑Sun Mar 12, 2023 12:48 amGot off bus, walked a block, seen her across the street about to stop to look at a clothes rack. Knew I couldn't skip or else I'd set the session of on the wrong tone. Good 3 or 4 min convo. She was a bit nervous. Grabbed her number, texted her right there, and she checked her phone to see if she got it. She accidently put in the wrong number in my phone and said "Oh my god... that's so embarrassing I get nervous talking to strangers." Got the real number, and she texted herself from my phone.
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
- MILFandCookies
- Posts: 1207 | Thanks: 588
- Joined: Wed Sep 16, 2020 12:29 am
- Name: Joe
- Goal: $10k+/month
- Age: 31
- Motto: Unchain your Passion & Live Life on Your Own Terms
- Location: Austin, TX/World
- Contact:
Logistics unfortunately get in the way a lot, nothing you can do about it.
Just keep up the action, you got this. You'll have what you're looking for sooner than you think.
I've helped > 100 guys get laid on dating apps.
📸🔥 Dating App Photographer - I'll get you laid, click here: https://www.DatingUnchained.com/ 🔥📸
P.S. I don't like MILFs, just the name ;)
Goal 1:
• Build + maintain $10k+ profit/month
Goal 2:
• Cut some fat to get abs again
📸🔥 Dating App Photographer - I'll get you laid, click here: https://www.DatingUnchained.com/ 🔥📸
P.S. I don't like MILFs, just the name ;)
Goal 1:
• Build + maintain $10k+ profit/month
Goal 2:
• Cut some fat to get abs again
- Bman
- Posts: 811 | Thanks: 1234
- Joined: Sat May 21, 2022 11:26 am
- Name: Brandon
- Goal: Get Laid
- Age: 30
- Motto: Pursue Purpose
- Location: Austin, TX
Day 98
Actions taken:
So afterwards, with her lying completely naked with me on the bed, I pretty much told her that despite our emotional connection, I didn't think that the sexual chemistry was there. I know I was playing with dynamite with both of us being at our most vulnerable, but I feel I'm a pretty good judge of character and thought we could both take it. So I took a leap of faith. I also told her about some of the feelings I had when when we discuss other partners with each other. She told me she did not feel rejected and was very grateful for me being so vulnerable.
We then discussed what we wanted to do next and how we wanted this relationship to be. Because we both said this was casual from the beginning, neither of us were married to any ideas of that.
Short version: I basically told her I wanted to take sex off the table for now and pretty much friend zone her. Be friends, share our sexcapde stories with, go to events with her because I enjoy spending time with her at those (and she's been great preselection), have heavy makeout sessions, and see if sex with her comes back into the picture for me in the future. Also based on this, I'd like to see her less often than the standard once a week.
I know this all probably goes against standard game advice. And you can't be friends with a girl like this... blah blah blah. I'd rather run the experiment myself. Just like people say you cant have a good divorce and be friends after, I'd like to put it to the test myself. I don't expect I or them are exceptions to the rules. But "rules" are more like guidelines anyways. I see no reason to throw away a good connection strictly because we don't have sex. I'm fine with having a few really close female friends that we both are adding value to each others lives. The important thing here is that she's entirely open to this, we're both honest, upfront, and clear about the boundaries of this relationship, and we enjoy it. The moment that's not the case, well then we can move on. Simple as that.
We then went to the munch and had a great time. We also previously discussed going to Shrine (the monthly BDSM event here) together which we are still planning to do but agreeing that we may be more wings than partners there.
I was nervous about saying or doing any of that, but it sure felt better to just lay it out, being completely ok with whatever happened, and not bullshitting each other.
Actions taken:
- Affirmations
- 2nd meditation in the afternoon
- Ran my munch
- Vulnerable, honest, and self affirming with Psychedelic Girl
Well we had a pretty heavy make out session and I spent some time pleasing her, but I just didn't get turned on really. Of course I was in my head about it, which never helps, but maybe I'm just not that into her sexually considering days earlier I had Spiritual Girl over and had no problems. Throws me for a loop a bit only because there is a good emotional connection and I really enjoy making out and taking her out to the munch.Bman wrote: ↑Sun Mar 05, 2023 12:34 pmI will say here, I had Psychedelic Girl over yesterday morning. I had not had sex all week because frankly, I just did not feel like having one of my girls over and did not get on the apps really. So I was looking forward to having her over. Except I didn't get hard. We have a great emotional connection, but the sexual chemistry is a bit iffy. Part of it is that she's shy to expressing her pleasure and has a difficult time orgasming. So I don't get turned on as much. So I showed her a good time, tying her up to the door, using the riding crop on her, and edging her with the magic wand. Then just enjoyed the feminine company and had a good conversation with her.
Another thing is she also has multiple partners like I do. She's pretty open about them and was telling about the other dates she went on in the week. I also mentioned a bit about my partners. Her other dates she's not had sex with them and basically making them wait or "feeling out if she actually wants them as partners". Being poly is something new for me, so I'm just observing what my reactions are right now. I could tell when she started talking about the other guys I felt myself comparing and wanting to be the best of the bunch. I don't think it's jealousy, more just a competitiveness and scratching the edge of the "I'm not good enough" insecurity. She texted me later in the day that was the closet she has ever gotten to actually orgasming to the control of someone else. We'll see how the attraction level goes with her the next couple interactions.
So afterwards, with her lying completely naked with me on the bed, I pretty much told her that despite our emotional connection, I didn't think that the sexual chemistry was there. I know I was playing with dynamite with both of us being at our most vulnerable, but I feel I'm a pretty good judge of character and thought we could both take it. So I took a leap of faith. I also told her about some of the feelings I had when when we discuss other partners with each other. She told me she did not feel rejected and was very grateful for me being so vulnerable.
We then discussed what we wanted to do next and how we wanted this relationship to be. Because we both said this was casual from the beginning, neither of us were married to any ideas of that.
Short version: I basically told her I wanted to take sex off the table for now and pretty much friend zone her. Be friends, share our sexcapde stories with, go to events with her because I enjoy spending time with her at those (and she's been great preselection), have heavy makeout sessions, and see if sex with her comes back into the picture for me in the future. Also based on this, I'd like to see her less often than the standard once a week.
I know this all probably goes against standard game advice. And you can't be friends with a girl like this... blah blah blah. I'd rather run the experiment myself. Just like people say you cant have a good divorce and be friends after, I'd like to put it to the test myself. I don't expect I or them are exceptions to the rules. But "rules" are more like guidelines anyways. I see no reason to throw away a good connection strictly because we don't have sex. I'm fine with having a few really close female friends that we both are adding value to each others lives. The important thing here is that she's entirely open to this, we're both honest, upfront, and clear about the boundaries of this relationship, and we enjoy it. The moment that's not the case, well then we can move on. Simple as that.
We then went to the munch and had a great time. We also previously discussed going to Shrine (the monthly BDSM event here) together which we are still planning to do but agreeing that we may be more wings than partners there.
I was nervous about saying or doing any of that, but it sure felt better to just lay it out, being completely ok with whatever happened, and not bullshitting each other.
Public Log: viewtopic.php?f=42&t=1397
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee
Year 1: viewtopic.php?p=49033#p49033
Year 2: viewtopic.php?p=66924#p66924
"Absorb what is useful. Reject what is useless. Add what is essentially your own." - Bruce Lee