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A lot of guys email me saying they feel frustrated, resentful, or even angry at women. They’re tired. They’re putting themselves out there. They’re getting rejected. And after a while, that frustration builds into this tight, uncomfortable knot: “Women have it easier. Women don’t give me a chance. Dating is unfair.” I get it. I spent two whole years in that same place. I was deep in the Red Pill forums, soaking in “women suck” propaganda like it was holy scripture. I wasn’t actually an angry man — I was a scared one. But anger felt safer to express. Fear didn’t. So it came out as resentment instead.
Most men are taught from childhood never to say “I’m scared” or “I feel unworthy.” We’re told to toughen up, man up, harden up — pick any verb. Fear becomes socially unacceptable, while anger is… well, less unacceptable. So instead of saying, “I’m terrified no woman will ever like me,” we say, “Women are the problem.” We mask our fear with frustration. But underneath that anger, the truth is almost always some form of: “I’m afraid I’m not good enough. I’m afraid I’ll be alone forever. I’m afraid I’ll try and fail.”
If that’s you right now, you don’t need to feel ashamed. You’re not broken, and you’re not a bad man. You’re a human being who never got permission to say, “I’m hurting.” None of us knows what we’re doing — myself included. Being human is confusing. Being a man is confusing. Dating is confusing. Half the time it feels like you’re thrown into the deep end without a life jacket, and the other half it feels like someone stole the whole damn pool. But the moment you stop pretending and start sharing what you’re actually feeling, everything gets easier. Connection becomes possible. Women stop feeling like the enemy. And you stop feeling like you’re going to war every time you leave the house.
The truth is, women can feel your resentment. It pushes them away — and when they pull back, it “proves” your fears right. That’s the self-fulfilling prophecy that keeps so many guys stuck. But the moment you let go of some of the anger and start stepping gently toward the actual emotion underneath — fear, sadness, doubt, loneliness — your results start to change. Every single time I’ve seen a guy drop the blame and take small steps toward honesty and connection, his dating life opens up. Women respond to warmth. They respond to openness. They respond to realness. And guess what? They’re scared too. They’re unsure too. They’re just waiting for someone to go first.
So if you’re going through that anger phase, just know this: it gets better.
Not all at once, and not by force, but step by step.
Admit you’re afraid.
Admit you don’t know what you’re doing.
Admit you’re lonely.
Admit you want connection.
That’s not weakness — it’s the first sign that you’re ready to grow. And if you need help, I’m here. Email me, leave a comment on my YouTube channel, or jump into coaching if you’re ready (50% off right now – only for the next 17 days).
You don’t need to do this alone, brother. You just need to be willing to take the first small step toward the truth.
