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I’ve talked a lot on this site about my before/after transformation – here’s a pretty dramatic picture which sums it up:
I wasn’t born confident. I wasn’t born successful. I wasn’t born knowing how to talk to women or build a business or even like myself. In fact, for most of my life, I was the exact opposite.
I was lost. Alone. Miserable. And I had absolutely no idea how to change.
When I was 28, I hit rock bottom. I had one friend, no money, no career prospects, and zero confidence. I’d just gone through a breakup and spent most nights crying alone in my empty apartment, convinced I’d ruined my life and that it was too late to turn things around.
I looked at other people and felt like they were miles ahead of me — they had relationships, friends, confidence, direction. And I had nothing. I felt broken, worthless, unworthy of love or happiness. I truly believed that even if I tried to improve, I’d never make it. I know a lot of you feel the same.
But that’s exactly why I do what I do now — because I was once exactly like you.
Hitting Rock Bottom
Back then, I was overweight, dressed terribly, and didn’t care about myself or my appearance. My clothes were stained and years old. My self-esteem was so low I didn’t even think I was worth putting effort into. I didn’t know how to talk to women. I didn’t believe anyone could ever love me. I had no plan, no future, no hope.
I honestly thought I’d die alone. (I really really thought this). Maybe I’d have one or two friends. Maybe I’d work a job I hated and barely scrape by. That was the future I expected for myself — because I didn’t think I deserved anything more.
I was even suicidal. I’d promised myself that if I hadn’t “figured it out” by the time I turned 30, I’d end my life. That’s how little I valued myself back then.
The First Steps Forward
Everything started to change when I discovered self-improvement communities and mentors. I found people like Good Looking Loser, Caleb Jones, and Mark Manson. I started reading books like You Can’t Afford the Luxury of a Negative Thought. I joined forums. I got a coach. I talked to people who were working on themselves and, for the first time, I started to believe that maybe I could change too.
I started small — painfully small. I learned how to approach women, even though it terrified me. (The first time I tried to hit on a girl properly, I had a full-on breakdown.) I worked on my mindset. I put effort into my appearance. I shaved my head, trimmed my beard, and bought clothes that actually fit me.
None of it was easy. Most of it was messy. I failed, a lot. (Really, there are no failures – only learning lessons). But I kept showing up and taking tiny steps — one day at a time. And over weeks, months, and years, those tiny steps turned into real change.
The Life That Followed
Slowly, everything began to shift. I made friends. I built confidence. I learned how to connect with women. I had relationships — real, beautiful, loving relationships. I discovered kink and BDSM. I explored my sexuality. I had threesomes. I built a sex life and a dating life that teenage me could never have dreamed of.
I built a business — one that lets me work wherever I want. Most of my time coaching people is spent outside, working from my phone or laptop, while I get to take a quick break to go talk to cute girls whenever they walk by (how freaking cool is that?) I get to spend my time helping other men change their lives. I created a life of abundance: freedom, adventure, love, joy, peace, and purpose. I’m so, so, so grateful.
And the most incredible part? My original goal was tiny. I just wanted to talk to one woman and have her be nice to me. That’s it. That was the bar. If I could do that, I thought, I’d “made it.”
Look how far beyond that I’ve gone.
It’s Worth Every Second
None of this happened overnight. It took years. It took fear, tears, rejection, mistakes, and countless moments of doubt. But every single second of effort was worth it. Every step I took brought me closer to the man I wanted to be — the man I am today.
I know many of you reading this are where I was. You feel too old. Too broken. Too hopeless. You think it’s too late. But it’s not. You’re not broken. You’re just at the start of your story.
If someone had looked at me in my early twenties — suicidal, overweight, friendless, broke, and alone — they would have written me off. They would have said, “That guy will never make it.” And they would’ve been wrong. Because that wasn’t the end of my story.
You’re Not Broken — You’re Just Getting Started
You have no idea how much you’re capable of. Most of you underestimate yourselves. You tell yourselves stories about how you’re not good enough, or it’s too late, or it’ll never work. But I promise you: if I could turn my life around, so can you.
I went to prison. I was suicidal. I hated myself. And now I’m here — happy, fulfilled, and surrounded by love, friends, adventure, and purpose. If that guy wasn’t broken, then neither are you.
This is just the beginning. You don’t have to change everything overnight. You just have to take one small step — today. Then another tomorrow. And another the day after that. Over time, those steps will transform your life into something you can’t even imagine yet.
Because I was once exactly where you are.
If I can do it, you sure as hell can too.
And if you want more help with any of this, come join our coaching program – you deserve to live a life far beyond your wildest dreams.
I believe in you.
