Want a traditional relationship, or monogamy, or a girlfriend? This podcast is for you.
This is probably my most important podcast yet – I dive into why you shouldn’t compare yourself to me, and why you shouldn’t assume my life is “cool” or “glamourous” or “perfect”. You need to build your own life, chase your own goals, and not aim to just directly copy-paste what I’ve done.
If you want a traditional relationship, or marriage + kids, or a loyal girlfriend – this podcast is a must-listen.
In short, my only goal with my site/coaching/podcast is for you to achieve YOUR goals and for you to be HAPPY. My goal isn’t to make you a copy-paste clone of me.
On that note, I am very rare for wanting lots and lots of sex and non-monogamy. The vast majority of men want monogamy (eventually) and marriage/kids (eventually). If you want these things too, awesome! Embrace the fact you want them, and work really fucking hard to achieve them. Go all-in.
You may want to have a casual sex/open relationship phase for a while – awesome! Treat it like a chapter in your life and go 100% all-in, and make it the best phase of your life. (If you want open relationships forever, that’s very achievable too – I’m proof of that. Again, do whatever YOU want to do, not what you think you “should” do. Don’t compare yourself to others.)
On this site I show you mostly the “highlight reels” of my life. I’m not a cool, super-awesome guy; I’m just above-average. I don’t go to parties or clubs or raves, etc. Most of my weekends are boring. You don’t have to be a super cool dude in order to get laid a lot (though if you are, great!)
If you get caught up in thinking girls are “sluts” for having a lot of sex, that’s something to work on. A girl who has a lot of sex isn’t a bad person. In the same way you wouldn’t go to Disneyland and say “Man, a lot of people have been on this ride, that’s disgusting, I’m not riding it” – don’t do the same thing with girls who’ve explored their sexuality. Just have a bit of fun with them, see them for as long as you’re both happy to see each other, and let go of your judgemental mindset/insecurity/jealousy.
Concepts like “All Women Are Like That” are incredibly myopic and downright wrong. You can’t judge people based on their POTENTIAL behaviour; nor can you judge the entire gender by their worst possible aspects. If we accept “all women will cheat on you and leave you”, then it’s just as valid to say “all men will rape you”. Poor attitudes like this only serve to make you bitter, angry, resentful and miserable. You’re setting yourself up for failure; if you believe women suck, it’ll become a self-fulfilling prophecy. I’ve talked about this before, here:
You don’t need “fuckboi” attributes in order to get laid a lot. Physical attractiveness is important, as is good style/fashion/dress-sense. Those things will help you in every aspect of your life.
You also don’t need to be a “BDSM god”. Just write a sexual bucketlist and get girls to write their own, and explore those things together.
Shownotes:
OBSESS about your goals:
https://kyil-extra.com/slight-edge/#25-1-or-2-main-goals-you-obsess-about
How to Write a Sexual Bucketlist:
Magic Wand Vibrator:
Andy’s counter-argument to “All Women Are Like That”:
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