Many of you have asked for a basic style guide that tells you exactly what to go out and buy – here it is, written by Radical. Radical’s THE style guy on my forums and absolutely knows his stuff; this is a great beginner’s guide. I’ve also added my own thoughts throughout. I wanna see you guys taking action and implementing his advice; improving your style has a massive effect on getting laid, on how your friends, family and colleagues treat you, and how the world in general sees you. So no excuses; improve your damn style.
The Aim of this Article
My goal for this article is to give a newbie the key points for dressing in a style that will get you noticed by girls and give you the best chance of getting laid.
If you do what we tell you to do here, you will have a low chance of being turned down on dates or on approach because of how you are dressed.
Along with general advice, I will also lay out an outfit for you to buy so you won’t have to second guess your options, as many newbies are prone to do.
Why do you need good style?
Dating is a numbers game and men with bad style are KILLING their odds in this numbers game.
We see it all the time from guys who rock up to the forums wanting to start their self-improvement journey. They have their fitness and bodies in check, some of them are socially free and able to approach girls at will…. but their style is utter trash.
With online dating we talk about how it is in essence a marketing exercise, a case of presenting yourself in the best light possible so you get more likes and can talk to more girls. Adopting great style is that process, but in real life. Take your presentation seriously and girls will take you more seriously as an option.
Andy’s thoughts: Style – the way you present yourself to the world – is the FIRST thing people will notice about you. It’s your FIRST impression; your first chance to show that you actually give a shit about the way you look, your first chance to show that you take yourself seriously. If you have poor style and dress like crap, you’re signalling to girls – and the greater population – that you don’t take yourself seriously. And if you don’t take yourself seriously, why should anybody else take you seriously?
I feel a need to aim a quick message at gym bros directly: unless you live in Hawaii or the Caribbean you can’t go around showing off your body in day-to-day life and hope to get by with girls that way. And even if you live in those places you need to dress up for going out at night I assume. Hell, even if you could walk around topless forever this is not optimal. Everyone needs to learn how to dress yourself in a way that girls respond well to. And guys who are good looking already are missing out on gains in that area by ignoring style.
Getting your style on point will have direct carryover into online dating. Andy and I see all the time guys asking for help with their Tinder profiles and upon posting their pics we see the guys are presenting a bland style in their pictures. Annoyingly those pictures would often otherwise be ok if the guy didn’t look like ‘Mr Nice Guy’ because of his clothes. You want to nail the presentation in your online dating pictures. Focusing on style is one of the easiest ways to get an edge over the masses of competition you face in the online dating environment.
With regards to the mental aspect of dating, you will also get a huge confidence boost from knowing you are dressed well. It’s up there with the confidence of knowing you are good looking. Anyone who has ‘looks-maxxed’ knows that mental transformation that comes along with that process – guys who have gone from seriously overweight to lean for example. It’s the same phenomenon with better clothes. You will see girls checking you out on the street, people in general will respond better to you than they did before. It’s all part of the ‘halo effect’. Great style is something that garners instant respect and more interest from the opposite sex.
Andy’s thoughts: The best part about style is once you nail it (which really doesn’t take much time or effort), you’re set. Unlike gaining muscle/losing weight which can both take months or years, you can make MASSIVE improvements with your style within a week. So there’s really no excuse for not improving your style right this second.
General Advice on Dressing Sexy
There’s no sugar-coating this, you need to be lean. Typically, this is the first port of call for any man embarking in self-improvement. Modern living has led most of us into that comfortable, skinny fat or overweight limbo at some point in our lives. Andy wrote a fantastic article about this issue called ‘getting lean matters above everything else’, and it is a sentiment I wholeheartedly agree with. The rough aim is to get down to visible abs with a defined jawline. Being lean carries over into making you look better in clothes as well. You will still be able to dress in a good style for dating if you are overweight, but it is playing on hard mode. I’d prefer you to put your time and energy into weight loss as opposed to sorting your style if you have a lot of weight left to lose.
It is also recommended that you put on some muscle. Get into the gym, lift some heavy shit, eat well and this will happen by accident. This is not the priority over being lean though. You can get laid while being skinny, Andy back in the day was good proof of this and I am not exactly walking round like a bodybuilder either. And neither are most male fashion models.
Andy’s thoughts: Your general grooming is important too. Trim/sculpt your facial hair; nobody likes a dishevelled neckbeard. Go get a stylish haircut. Whiten your teeth. Cover the basics.
Accessories are sexy
If you followed Andy’s content for any length of time you will have heard him implore you to start wearing accessories. Rings, necklaces, watches, fucking anything. Arguably the thing that separates guys dressing like wallflowers from guys who stand out will be the accessories they choose to wear. Purely because bland guys will opt to wear none at all.
Y’all need to get some bling!
My recommendation is a maximum of 4 accessories and a minimum of 2 in any outfit. Anything beyond 4 and you will look cluttered, anything below 2 and no one will really notice you are wearing them.
Examples of accessories: hats, watches, necklaces, rings, chains, scarfs. You get the idea.
Andy’s thoughts: Again, you want to look like you actually put in some effort; like you actually bothered to try. Putting on a ring, a watch, a necklace, perhaps a hat shows that you actually CARE about the way you look, and didn’t just roll out of bed, throw on a loose pair of pants and an old shirt and leave the house looking like a slob. Put some effort in and show you care.
Fit is crucial
Getting clothes that fit you could not be more critical to dressing well and it is the first thing you should consider before any clothing. In my full style guide, it is a mandatory step that you buy or borrow some measuring tape and work out all your clothing measurements. This will help inform which sizes you need, especially if buying online. Tighter fits such as skinny and slim have been in style for the past few years and it remains that way. These will only work if you nail the sizes.
Brands don’t really matter
I will recommend some specific brands here, but I don’t want anyone reading this to obsess over those brands. It is not the brands which are important. The cut, the fit, the colour, the texture, these are all factors more important than the brands. If something on here isn’t available in your region, and you find alternatives that match the item I have laid out, then go for it. I have picked the ones that I personally own and can vouch for. But again, it is not about the brands, that is the least important part of style.
Buy the items we’ll be mentioning (these are NOT affiliate links):
- Alpha Industries Bomber Jacket Black
- Zara Slim Fit T-Shirt Black
- ASOS Slim Fit Jeans Black
- Adidas Stan Smiths White/Navy
- Silver Pendant Necklace & Rings
- Alternative options: Boohoo Jeans Charcoal
(All the items mentioned are linked above.)
Black slim fit jeans
These need to fit you as close as possible. I recommend in my full style guide that you take your measurements to make better use of online size guides. The important measurements for jeans are your waist, hips, and inseam. Crucially the bottom of the jeans should hug your calves and the jeans should end at your ankle. A big mistake I see is having excess denim bunching up above the shoes, you can roll up if you have some excess, but the preference is you buy jeans of the correct length in the first place. The jeans should also be paired with a black belt that has a metal buckle.
Something I also like to do instead of just pair the black jacket with black jeans is to opt for the charcoal/black wash option. Technically they are grey jeans, and it creates a subtle contrast that I like instead of going full monotone black.
Adidas Stan Smiths
Low cut white leather tennis shoes are something of a short cut to looking like a fuck boy. Contrasting to the all-black outfit they will stand out just as the accessories do. I recommend Stan Smiths because these are the shoes I own but any type of shoe that matches this description will work here.
Black Zara t shirt
The T-Shirt should hug your bicep and the slim fit means its tighter around your waist as well. Trends have gone away from longline T-shirts recently, so my recommendation is the basic crew neck slim fit T-Shirts sold by Zara. It should be easy enough to locate a store near you. I get asked about V-necks and I’m not the biggest fan of them vs a crew neck. They are fine but don’t go for a particularly deep V-neck if you are a fan.
Bombers are an option that should be present in every man’s wardrobe. They are usually on the lighter side of outerwear so can be worn comfortably even in warmer climates. They come in a range of textiles including leather and suede. The brand I am wearing in the pictures is the Alpha Industries MA-1 bomber. This brand was popular among the style aficionados back on GLL, many of whom I consider mentors in style. It is well regarded outside of our community as well for the quality but it is an expensive option. I do typically recommend spending the bigger money on quality outerwear but if the price tag is an issue I have a couple of value heavy recommendations. Topman or Jack & Jones both do solid MA-1 bombers for a more reasonable price. The Jack & Jones option I like because it is sleek and minimalistic option.
A bit of advice I was given with bombers was that you should buy a size down from what would normally be your fit if the jacket is oversized. The Topman bomber for instance you can go for a M if you would normally be a L. The Alpha Industries and Jack & Jones bombers though are true to size so just go with what you would normally get.
If you are going with Alpha Industries, cut off the big red tag that comes with it.
The necklace I’m rocking here is a St Christopher pendant in silver. It’s a popular pendant type and you will probably see it around. He was the patron saint of travellers and anyone familiar with me through Andy’s forums will know I’m a big traveller, so this one spoke to me above the other options. Like tattoos, its beneficial if the jewellery means something to you as you will end up wearing it more and feel less weird about doing so. Other good pieces like this are the compass pendants in silver. My preference is towards thin chains and smaller pendants, this matches my overall taste in jewellery – minimalist and understated.
I am also wearing two metal rings on index and ring finger. I got the tungsten index ring from a jewellery shop and had it sized. The other is from ring packs I bought from H&M.
I recommend TwistedPendant for buying good accessories.
You can go a bit bigger with jewellery than I do but don’t take it too far, like say Lil Pump and Flava Flav.
All dark clothing
The first striking thing about this outfit is that we are going all black/dark except the Stan Smiths. Wearing all black is the fastest way I can get you to looking like a player.
I first clocked on to this trick reading the log of an old Good Looking Loser legend called BoyToy, he used to take this look as far as he could, even wearing a pair of black leather gloves. All black is now a reliable staple for me whenever I’m not sure about what to wear for a date, it suits pretty much any complexion you can have.
For a long time, I didn’t think I suited black. Because I am naturally pale, I long held onto some fashion advice I read years back saying pale guys should never wear black as it accentuates the issue. I even worried that I would look a bit like a goth trying to wear only black. Both of those musings were obviously wrong, everyone looks great in black and it’s a standard one to fall back to if you are unsure about colour combinations in general.
Andy’s thoughts: Going all-black is a cheat code for guys who haven’t fully figured out style yet. Almost everybody looks good in all-black; it’s a great default option.
Actions to Take
Piecing this outfit together is the first action you can take towards the style needed for dating. Wear this sort of outfit as much as you can so you feel comfortable looking like someone that gets laid.
Other actions you can take for improving style
- Buy the outfit recommended.
- Go shopping, try other clothes on and take pictures.
- Bring those pictures to the forums for feedback.
- Alternatively join Andy’s group coaching and ask for feedback there – As well as Andy, I can vouch there are lads in there with great style who know what they are looking at.
- Buy a bunch of accessories and find out what styles and options you like wearing, not wearing any isn’t good enough if you want to get laid a lot.
- Download my full style guide for beginners that goes even further in depth than this article and also suggests items to build a wardrobe around.
- For those who want more bespoke style advice and a fast track to fixing this area of the getting laid puzzle, I am offering one on one style coaching. For those interested email firstname.lastname@example.org.