Buy the exact wand vibrator I own (heads up, that’s an affiliate link), shipping all around the world (just set your country/currency at checkout):
Prices are in British Pounds by default, so just change your country/currency. It comes with adapters for every country, so it’ll work with your power outlet.
Here’s a how-to guide on using the wand:
One thing I never shut the hell up about is my magic wand vibrator – it is the BEST toy I have, out of all the million-and-one sex toys I own. If you have nothing else, buy one. (You can buy any good wand vibrator, I just recommend this particular Doxy one because it’s the one myself and my mates have used for a couple years. If you buy a different one, just make sure it plugs into the wall (not battery powered), and make sure it has good reviews).
Wand vibrators (the powerful ones you plug into the wall) are “set and forget” – you just turn it on, hold it against her pussy, and the toy will do the rest. It’s the lazy man’s orgasm-generator.
For the longest time, I avoided having any toys, because it would have hurt my ego & damaged my pride. Back in my early days of getting laid, I wanted to be an “alpha male” – I was convinced I had to satisfy women with just my hands/dick/mouth, and that toys were “cheating”. Even when I first started having BDSM sex, I didn’t have any toys – I just used my suit tie as a blindfold, and I’d spank girls with my hand. No ropes, no vibrators, no whips or chains or anything like that.
Eventually one of my mates convinced me to buy a couple of toys and try them on girls. I started with a blindfold and handcuffs, and holy shit, that was so much fun. I then tried a whip, and every girl absolutely loved it. Finally I faced my fears and bought a couple of vibrators, convincing myself I wasn’t “less of a man” if I let a toy make girls cum instead of using my hands/mouth/dick.
As my mate said (the one who convinced me to start buying toys): “Well for me it’s more that the toys can do stuff I can’t. It adds to the experience for the girl. No matter how good you are, a toy at the right moment makes it better for the girl.”
And god damn am I glad I listened to him. I tried a few different vibrators (some were shit, some I still use to this day). Eventually I worked my way up to a huge magic wand, and it blew my fucking mind. Not least of all because of how bloody big it is – it’s the same length as my elbow to the tip of my outstretched fingers.
It’s so god damn powerful, it sounds like a chainsaw:
Still not convinced? Here’s what 2 guys who took my advice and bought one had to say:
Seriously – this thing is godlike.
I’ve tried 2 other wand vibrators in the past (the other two were battery powered, with no cord), but the batteries sucked – they only lasted about 20 minutes. The wands were also nowhere near as powerful as this one is. Vibrators you plug into the wall will always be a million times more powerful than battery-powered ones.
I use it as a “cheat” or shortcut for good foreplay – I don’t have to do anything other than lie down next to her and hold it on her pussy, and just wait. She’ll cum without me even doing anything. If you’re inexperienced, a virgin, or nervous: this is your cheat code to begin decent at foreplay. Just hold this thing on her pussy and you’re good to go. (Also, while you’re here – grab this book for $1. It’ll get you laid in 6 weeks.)
I also use it to tease her – I hold it on her clit until she’s close to cumming, then pull it away, making her cry out and beg for more. Put it back on her clit until she’s close again then take it away, repeating this over and over, until she’s a wet, quivering mess, begging me to fuck her. Good times.
It’s also great if you’ve been really busy lately and have a lot of things to think about, or a lot of stresses/worries bouncing around your head. Just turn it on to the absolute lowest setting (so it’ll take ages to make her cum), put it on her clit, and then just lie on her tummy, letting yourself think about whatever it is you need to think about. I’ve had times where I just lie there for 30 minutes planning out my goals, or thinking about something that’s been bothering me – while she’s in orgasmic bliss. At the end of it she tells me how amazing a job I did… meanwhile all I really did was spend some time in my own head, planning things out. It’s fucking awesome; you don’t even have to concentrate and she’ll be thanking you for giving her the best orgasm she’s ever had.
Podcast Talking About the Magic Wand
My girl and I recorded an entire episode talking about how to use the magic wand, whether or not girls really care if you make them orgasm, why some girls struggle to orgasm (even with a toy), some tricks to blow her mind, and a story about a girl who could cum from just her nipples.
How to Use
Plug it into the wall and turn it on (push the Power button). It’ll start itself on the last setting you used (which is the lowest setting if you’ve never used it before.) Most girl’s eyes light up when they hear the sound it makes – if you like, turn it to the highest setting just to watch her go, “Oh my god!” (Make sure you turn it back down to the lowest setting before using it).
Get her to lie down on her back then just put it on her clit and hold it there – that’s literally it. (For some girls, her clit will be too sensitive – just hold it slightly below her clit, against her pussy). You really don’t have to do much except for hold it there and she’ll think you’re the god of pleasure.
When you first put it on her pussy, start on the lowest setting. Often the highest setting is way too strong, and some girls will say they can’t cum from that because it’s just too much. Start on the lowest setting and see how she responds. Slowly ramp it up one setting at a time, waiting 30 seconds or so on each setting. Each time, ask her how it feels and if she wants more intense, or if she likes it the way it is right now (just bare in mind at some point she may not be able to respond properly, too wrapped up in her own pleasure). If she says it’s good, just leave it on that setting. If she asks for more, go up one level. If she says it’s too sensitive, just take it down one setting.
At some point as you’re slowly going up in power, some girls will just have an orgasm – fucking awesome. Keep playing with her and give her more orgasms if you like, or put the toy away and fuck her brains out 😉 Other girls will need you to go all the way up to the highest setting – you can jokingly call them a Power Queen.
Have fun with the vibrator – it’s something you and the girl can just mess around with and try a bunch of different things together. You can tease girls’ nipples with it (on the lowest setting) – most girls love how it feels (but her clit will feel better). You can give her a back massage with it (or get her to give you one) – you literally just have to hold it in spots on her back, or slowly move it around.
You can also play around with different positions – some girls love going doggystyle, with you pushing the toy against her clit from behind. It’s also fun to make her stand up, and you stand behind her, sliding it between her legs. Then tell her to close her legs, clamping down on it as it presses against her clit.
You can also get her to ride on top of your dick, with the vibrator pressed against her clit. It has a very long cord (3m/7ft), so you’ll be able to move it around wherever you want.
It’s good fun using it whenever you’re fucking her – the vibrations will hit your cock, running up and down the length of it, feeling bloody awesome. I usually thrust very slowly when doing this, and sometimes I even just hold still, with my cock only halfway inside her pussy. That way I can really feel the vibrations, but also feel the sensation of her pussy clenching around my dick, especially as she cums. If you and her play around a bit and practice, it’s possible for you both to cum at the exact same time, which is hot as hell.
Try it doggystyle with your dick in her – push her down so she’s lying totally flat on the bed (on her stomach), with the vibrator underneath her. Then slide your cock inside her pussy and lay down flat on top of her. When I do this, I just stay completely still, with my cock inside her, the vibrating pulsing through her clit and the base of my cock.
I’ve cum from this (without thrusting/fucking her at all) – it’ll take like 5 minutes and be very slow building, but when you do cum it’s like a wave, slowly washing over you. Make sure you don’t move at all, to get the full effect. It’s fucking instense – it’ll blow your god damn mind. It doesn’t feel like a normal orgasm; it’s slower to build up (you feel like it’s building up over minutes, rather than seconds) and more powerful when it hits, and it lasts much longer – you’ll feel like you’re cumming nonstop for 30 seconds. It’s mind-blowing.
To turn Pulse Mode on, make sure the vibrator is currently OFF, and then hold the Power Button for about 1 full second.
Pulse Mode is a bit confusing to explain, but essentially it starts at the lowest vibration setting and works its way to the highest vibration, then instantly resets back to the lowest vibration and repeats.
When you’re in Pulse Mode, pushing the (+) Button doesn’t increase the intensity of the vibrations – it increases the speed at which the vibrator goes from lowest vibrations to highest vibrations. So if you push the (+) Button a bunch of times, the vibrator will start going from lowest to highest very quickly (it’ll take about half a second to go from lowest to highest vibration, then reset back to lowest and take another second to go to highest, and repeat).
If you push the (-) Button a bunch of times, then the vibrator will go from lowest to highest vibration very slowly (it’ll take about 10 seconds to go from lowest vibration to highest vibration).
It makes more sense if you watch the video:
- The vibrator is turned OFF, so I hold the Power Button for 1 second to initiate Pulse Mode.
- Pulse mode starts on the FASTEST pulse for me (I had previously pushed the (+) Button a bunch of times to turn it onto the FASTEST pulse mode). I leave it on FAST pulse for a bit so you can see.
- Then I push the (-) Button a bunch of times so it goes down to the SLOWEST pulse mode. You can see it now takes like 10 seconds to go from lowest vibration to highest vibration, then resets back down to lowest.
- Then I push the (+) Button a bunch of times again, so it goes back up to FASTEST pulse mode. Now it’s only about half a second between lowest to highest vibration.
- To turn the vibrator off, just hold the Power Button again.
Different girls will like different pulse settings, so play around and ask her which one feels the best for her. Some girls also like it nice and slow at the start, and then progessively faster as time goes on, hitting the fastest setting right as she’s getting close to cumming. Other girls prefer just the normal setting
Sometimes I use the pulse mode; othertimes I just leave it on the normal setting (constant vibration). It depends on how I’m feeling, or what the girl tells me feels the best.
The pulse mode works better than the normal setting for some girls in particular. They seem to love the fact it’s constantly changing in intensity – when it’s just a constant setting, some girls will struggle to orgasm, but the pulsing sends them over the edge.
If you’ve never edged a girl (or yourself), you’re missing out. Edging is when you get her right to the edge of orgasm, but then stop right before she’s about to cum, so she’s oh so close… but not quite there. (If you stop too late, she’ll still cum, but it’ll be a half-orgasm – known as a “ruined orgasm”).
Edging is fun as hell – nothing drives a girl crazier than getting her close to the edge then stopping, waiting 15 seconds, then starting it all back up again and getting her right to the edge… then stopping again. Girls go fucking mad for this; it’s the secret to good foreplay. You just have to keep teasing her like this for 20 minutes until she’s absolutely begging you to fuck her, desperate to do absolutely anything for you.
The wand makes it so much easier to edge girls – just hold it against her clit til she’s about to cum, then pull it away and wait 15 seconds, then repeat. Easy.
You can also tell her she isn’t allowed to orgasm until you give her permission. So every time she gets close, she has to look you in the eyes and beg, “Please let me cum…” The first 5 times she asks you, say “No.” in a very firm voice and make her pull the vibrator away from herself. She’ll be a horny, desperate, quivering mess. After a few times of this, say, “Yes.” and watch her absolutely fucking explode.
Bonus points if you talk dirty to her while she’s edging herself (or while you’re edging her). “You’re such a horny little slut aren’t you, right on the edge of cumming, so desperate to explode but knowing you’re not allowed to do so without my permission. It makes you so fucking horny knowing I’m in control of your orgasm, doesn’t it? Maybe I won’t let you cum at all.. maybe I’ll make you wait weeks before I let you have that release.”
Orgasms & Multiple Orgasms:
Giving girls an orgasm with the wand is easy as hell – just hold it on her clit and play around with the settings until you find one she says feels the best. Then just hold it there and think about what you’re going to have for dinner. I’m not even joking – you can literally let your mind wander while you’re holding it there, and she’ll have an orgasm without you having to try.
When girls orgasm from a wand vibrator, they’ve told me it’s a completely different orgasm to what they’re used to – because it’s so overwhelming and fucking strong, they completely forget where they even are. They forget literally everything else, their head is completely empty and they’re not thinking about any of life’s worries, or the usual girl insecurities like whether you think she’s pretty, or if she’s doing a good job for you, etc. They can just let go and be consumed by the impending orgasm, riding it as it comes, and being in complete bliss.
It’s like a “spiritual” orgasm. An orgasm of the soul. (Maybe I’m turning into a hippie).
And if you hold it on her clit even after she’s cumming, even when she’s telling you it’s too sensitive (you may have to turn it back down to the lowest setting), if you just keep it there despite her protests, in another minute or so often she’ll have another orgasm, and then another, and another, all her orgasms starting to blend together into one big long orgasm. Congratulations! You’ve just made a girl have multiple orgasms. (That’s their superpower; our superpower is being able to pee standing up, so it’s a fair trade-off).
One day my girlfriend decided to see how many times she could cum in a certain period of time. She hit 14 orgasms within about 45 minutes. And as I’ll go into detail below, that’s mind-blowing for her in particular; when we first met, she had never had an orgasm in front of anybody else, and used to take over an hour to have one orgasm by herself.
You can also tie the vibrator to a girl’s pussy if you have some ropes – girls go nuts for this. Tie her up, blindfold her, tie the wand to her pussy and just leave it there while you go do something else (like watch a football game, wash the dishes, or grab a bowl of popcorn and watch her orgasm over and over, unable to move or get away from the vibrator, completely lost in countless orgasms).
The best part about the wand is girls will give you full-credit for giving them an orgasm; even if all you do is hold the wand on their pussy and just wait. It’s like passive income – you do nothing and the compliments just roll in for free. Passive orgasm income.
What Girls Think of It:
My girlfriend said:
Prior to using the wand, I really really struggled to orgasm. It was a huge point of frustration hearing stories from friends who could use their hand and orgasm in less than 10 minutes. It would take anywhere from half an hour to an hour on my own, watching porn using a typical vibrator on the highest setting.
The idea of having an orgasm with someone else seemed pretty impossible once there was the added challenge of self-consciousness. [[Andy’s note: Some girls find it almost impossible to orgasm in front of someone else. More on that below.]] When Andy first let me try the wand, my first impression was: Jesus Christ this is powerful. I could understand while this style of toy would have the girls in porn screaming. While it did take quite a long time, the sheer power of the toy got me over the edge maybe in an hour the first time.
After that, it was then a slow process of having orgasms quicker and quicker, figuring out what felt good with the wand and feeling less self-conscious. It was very quickly a favourite toy. After a while I found I didn’t need it on the highest setting, and now it generally takes roughly 5 minutes from start to finish. Just for fun I tried to orgasm as quickly as possible a few times, and with the wand I got there in under a minute. [[Andy’s note: Remember, this is the same girl who used to take over an hour to orgasm]].
It’s been a lot of fun using it with other girls too. Because it’s so bloody big it’s hard to miss the target. And most other girls seem more than satisfied with how strong it can get. If anything, most can’t take the highest setting.
Every other girl I’ve used it on has loved it too – it blows a lot of their minds. Another girl I dated a while ago had the same struggle as my girlfriend; she too had never orgasmed in front of anyone. I’ll talk more about her below, but it took us a few sessions with the vibrator before she was finally able to let go and cum. She was blown away – she had it in her head that she would never be able to orgasm in front of anybody else, and even by herself she struggled to orgasm even in the perfect setting with no distractions.
My mates and coaching clients who’ve bought one also rate them highly – the two comments I get most are, “Jesus it’s so bloody big” and “Holy fuck it’s powerful… like, too powerful.”
This is pretty much the reaction of all my mates who I’ve encouraged to get one:
Girls Who Struggle to Orgasm
Orgasms for girls are a bit (a lot) different to guys. Guys can cum pretty easily, from any sort of stimulation – blowjobs, sex, handjobs, grinding against a pillow (no, I’ve never done that (Ok, I did it when I was younger)). Sure, sometimes you might take a fair bit of stimulation, but for the most part, as long as there’s a bit of stimulation, you will cum fairly easily.
Girls require more than physical stimulation to cum – they also have to “let go”. Orgasms for girl are much more of a “release” – meaning, if she’s too tense or too stressed, she might not be able to let go and orgasm. Their orgasms require not being in their own head too much or having too many stresses or distractions. (Some girls can cum easily and don’t have much trouble letting go, but there’s a hell of a lot of girls who really struggle). Which is why a lot of girls have a “routine” when they’re giving themselves an orgasm:
- Some girls will run a bath and burn some incense, then play with themselves for an hour gently before finally orgasming.
- Other girls use a very specific vibrator they’ve discovered works for them, on a very particular setting in a very particular spot on their clit.
- Some girls require a clear head – they can’t orgasm if they have a lot of things on their mind.
- Other girls can only come by themselves – they find it too distracting if somebody else is there.
- Some girls watch porn in order to turn themselves on a lot, and sometimes have to watch an hour or more of it before they can be “present” enough and be in tune with their own body enough to actually orgasm.
- Some girls need candles and nice music and have to have a shower first in order to feel “pretty” before they can orgasm.
Really, the reason some girls struggle to orgasm without these routines is they’re in their own head too much. (Guys do the same thing – some of us struggle with performance anxiety/erectile dysfunction because we’re in our own head too much). When a girl is in her own head too much, sometimes it gets so bad she literally “can’t” orgasm because she can’t get past the thought, “It’s impossible for me to cum.” It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, where she’s convinced she can’t orgasm, and she can’t stop obsessing about the idea of not having an orgasm. And if you obsess about not having an orgasm, then guess what? You’re probably not going to have an orgasm.
This is actually the main reason I bought my wand a few years ago. I’d met a couple of girls who had never had an orgasm (or who really struggled to have one), and I did some research into it. There were a shitload of people saying wand vibrators were the way to go; you can just hold it on her clit and she’ll orgasm eventually, as long as you’re patient. And they were right.
The first time my girlfriend ever used it, she used to take ages to cum – I had to hold the vibrator on her clit on full-power for about 1hr before she came. It was a test of endurance for both of us; my arm kept getting sore, she could feel herself getting tired, but we just held on. Eventually after a bloody hour (and a million “almost orgasms”), we finally got there. It was worth it in the end, but it was a lot of work.
With practice and patience, over time she started being able to orgasm quicker and quicker, and can now easily cum within 1 minute. Pretty impressive from the girl who originally took an hour.
Just bare in mind if your girl struggles to orgasm, getting quicker is going to take a lot of patience from both you and her. And if she really finds orgasming difficult, you may not be able to make her orgasm the first few times you try the vibrator.
The best thing to do if you have a girl who struggles to cum is talk to her about it beforehand. Make it clear you’ll both have a play with the toy but you don’t expect her to orgasm – don’t put any pressure on her or she may not be able to relax and let go if she’s worried about letting you down. Tell her you’ll just try for a while but if she can’t cum, it’s all good. And make sure you really don’t get frustrated if she can’t cum. You can both just try again next time.
One girl in particular I did this with took quite a few times before she could release. We tried with the wand 2 times and she got really close but couldn’t quite “let go” and relax enough to orgasm – she was in her own head too much, worrying about disappointing me. The third time we tried, we put on a movie to watch and just concentrated on that, with the vibrator between her legs. After about 30 minutes she went really quiet, and I realised she looked like she might orgasm. A minute or two later she started moaning like crazy, her body arching as she let it all out, and then she started giggling like crazy. She had this giant smile on her face and told me she couldn’t believe she’d had her first orgasm in front of someone.
She was over the moon about it:
When Do I Use it?
Honestly? I use mine about 90% of the time I have sex, especially with new girls who haven’t tried a wand vibrator before. And especially with any girls who tell me they have trouble orgasming in front of somebody else – it’s so much fun taking on that challenge (even if it takes us a few sessions), and eventually blowing her mind when she’s able to have an orgasm. Girls are always so damn proud of themselves when they’re able to just let go and release that orgasm.
You don’t have to use it as much as I do; sex is all about having fun and exploring, not whether or not you can make a girl orgasm. I want to make it really damn clear you’re not “less of a man” or “a failure” if the girl doesn’t cum. Her orgasm doesn’t matter anywhere near as much as whether or not you two both clicked and had fun. Foreplay/teasing/making out/delaying her pleasure and making her beg is always much more important than giving her an orgasm.
That said, the wand vibrator is fucking fun to use, and it makes edging/teasing and orgasms infinitely easier. Plus it’s funny seeing every girl’s jaw drop when you first turn it onto the highest setting and it whirs up to the loudness of a chainsaw – that never gets old to me.
How to Clean It
Most toy-makers say you really just have to use hot water and soap to clean your toys. I’m usually a little more thorough:
- Hot water + soap.
- Alcohol spray (70% isopropyl).
- Toy Cleaning Spray
Soap: Just use any soap. I like liquid soap (from a pump bottle) because it’s easier to apply than a bar of soap.
70% Isopropyl Alcohol: Buy a big bulk container of it from ebay/Amazon, as it’ll be much cheaper. Then buy an empty spray bottle for a couple of bucks.
Toy Cleaning Spray: Use any toy cleaning spray that has good reviews. I use this one.
Make sure you do not submerge the whole toy under water, and do not get any water on the “wand” part of the toy. ONLY get water on the rubbery “head” of the toy – the rest of the toy you can clean with a damp sponge or some alcohol spray. Even then, be careful not to get the head too wet (it’s an electric toy, after all).
It may get warm to the touch after about 10 minutes of being on the highest setting. It’s never hot, and it never gets in the way of pleasure – so if yours gets warm, it’s normal. Most girls won’t even notice when they’re in the throes of pleasure. But remember I’ve left it on for over an hour, multiple times, and never had a problem.
Where I keep it – I have it in a special cupboard in my bedroom with all my toys. When I’m about to meet a girl, I take the wand out and have it plugged in, sitting right next to my bed where she can see it (some of them ask about it and want to try it before I’ve even suggested it).
If you’re a sex freak like me, you can even try “jerking off” with it – just hold it against the base of your cock. (I personally don’t like putting it on the tip of my cock because it’s too sensitive). You can also wear a pair of underpants, and then hold the wand over the top, so there’s a layer of fabric between your dick and the wand (this seems to help with the sensitivity issue). On the highest setting, you’ll probably cum in like 30 seconds – it’s fucking insane.
Buy the exact wand vibrator I own (affiliate link), shipping all around the world (just set your country/currency at checkout):
Prices are in British Pounds by default, so just change your country/currency. It comes with adapters for every country, so it’ll work with your power outlet.
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