Here’s a wild thought for you: Never take anything anyone says as The Gospel Truth. Nobody is right about everything – including me.
Everything I’ve published on this site, all my impassioned cries for you to listen to the experienced advice I’m giving you, is what’s worked for me and my friends/coaching clients. But what works for you may end up being entirely different to what’s worked for me.
The point of getting laid, self-improvement – hell, life in general – is to experiment and try things out to find out what suits you and your personal likes/dislikes & preferences. Even if I give you the most killer advice of all time, something that’s brought me more success than anything else, you might try it and decide, “Nah, I don’t like the way that feels when I do it.”
On the flipside – if I’ve tried something a few times and it hasn’t worked out, I’ll warn others about following in my failed footsteps. But perhaps you find a way to make it work. Maybe you find the missing puzzle piece that brings it all together and makes it magically, satisfyingly click into place.
This concept of experimenting – of carving your own path, separate from mine – also applies to screening girls. I have my own “type” of girls I prefer. I have my own likes and dislikes, turn-ons and turn-offs, things I’m willing to put up with and things I just see as time-wasting.
A lot of things that turn me off might not be so much of a turnoff for you – in which case I recommend you experiment and figure out for yourself what constitutes a timewaster. Something I see as a girl wasting my time, you might see as “just having fun with some banter.”
The things I like & dislike are going to be radically different to what you like & dislike. You and I are not going to agree on a lot of preferences when it comes to women. My idea of a great girl won’t line up with yours, and that’s why you need to experiment and figure out what you like.
I’m not perfect, I’ve never claimed to have all the answers. I’m just a guy who’s done a lot of living and done a lot of experimenting. I’ve learned what works for me, what doesn’t work, and I’m here to share as much of my knowledge with you as I possibly can. But nothing I say is The Whole Truth – it’s up to you to use my experience and advice to run your own experiments, carve your own path, become your own man.
I’m the last person on Earth who’ll ever say my advice is 100% right, 100% of the time. My site is just me saying, “This worked for me – it should work for you too, but try it out and find out.” As I said here, there’s a million paths to success; my way isn’t the only way.
Sitting around theorising about what the answer may be will only get you so far. At some point you have to take the plunge, throw yourself into the deep end and actually try it and find out.
More importantly, don’t let anyone (including me) talk you out of something you really want to do. Prove them wrong.
Life itself is just a big experiment. Nobody really knows what to do. You’re not born with the answers – you’re born a fucking retard, and over the course of your life you become slightly-less-retarded.
Go out there and try a bunch of shit.
Over time you’ll figure out what works, what doesn’t, and you’ll get better at navigating the tumultuous waters of life. Keep experimenting and you’ll naturally become more intrepid and self-assured, just like I have. Actually, you’ll likely exceed me – I want you to.
Update: I recorded a follow-up podcast talking more about this:
And a second podcast:
Short but great post. One of the reasons I was so attracted to gll and kyil is that the core message is ‘stop thinking about it. Get out of your house and go see it for yourself’. Experience over theory (at least in getting laid). Although I would add the caveat ‘in your early stages you have to choose ONE method and follow it blindly, then you can draw conclusions’.
Absolutely – you do need to give things a proper go and try it for a while before switching and trying something else. Jumping back and forth too quickly means you’ll never stick with anything long enough to see if it actually works.