If you want to live a successful, kickass life – one where you don’t self-sabotage and get in your own way – there’s a number of questions you’ll need to ask yourself. Questions most people shy away from at best – or at worst, actively run away from. Questions like, “Why am I here?” “What is the meaning of life?” “Do I deserve to be successful?” Without taking the time to start asking yourself these questions, you’ll never get to the heart of your issues, and you’ll never truly be able to go all-in and achieve real, measurable success – and happiness.
So listen to all these of these podcasts below, and then I want you to start asking yourself all the questions I’ve written out below. But start with the podcasts first:
Below are all the questions I mentioned during these podcast episodes.
Remember, the goal isn’t to just rush through all these. Take your time, let the answers slowly come to you over time; some of these questions might take you months or years to fully answer. And your answers are likely to evolve over time, particularly as you achieve goals, start working on new ones, gain new life experiences and new perspectives, etc.
1st batch of questions:
- Why does Andy (and other successful players) deserve to get laid a lot, but not me? Why am I special?
- Andy was a total loser at the start, so if he can get laid a lot, why can’t I?
- Am I just putting up bullshit excuses like these ones?
- Why does Andy deserve to overcome his depression, but not me?
- Why wouldn’t girls like me? Is there really something wrong with me? Can I improve that or work around it?
- Do I want to feel helpless and hopeless? Does my hopelessness help or protect me in some way – am I getting something out of it? (Watch this podcast, it covers this topic in great detail and will blow your mind).
- Do my flaws really mean no women will ever like me? Can I make up for my flaws by having some really strong, awesome strengths?
- What attributes would a player have, that I don’t?
- Can I work on getting those attributes?
- Do I deserve to be miserable and unhappy? Why? Why do other people deserve to be happy, but not me?
- Am I destined to be a failure for life, or can I change that?
- Did the universe/God/whatever preordain me to be a failure? Does that have to be the case, or can I rise up and change the course of my own life?
- The guys that are players – not all of them were players at the start [I – Andy – am a good example of this]. So they literally learned how to get laid a lot, learned how to improve themselves, learned how to lose fat, learned how to make friends, learned how to beat depression, learned how to overcome their negative thoughts… Can’t I just learn all those skills too, one by one?
2nd Batch of Questions:
- What are your goals? Not what do you deserve, but what do you want? Dream big, even if you think it’s stuff you’ll never actually have.
- What are your main blockages? What’s holding you back?
- Are you just asking me for permission to go all-in and make getting laid your number 1 goal?
- Do you have a fear that girls won’t like you if they see the real, vulnerable you?
- Do you worry if you have sex with too many girls, the girls will think you’re a bad person/not like you?
- Do you worry about what other people will think of you?
- Do you worry you’re not good enough to get laid; you’re not really a player, you’re not equal to Chris/Scotty/me/anyone else?
- Do you worry that having a tonne of sex will ultimately be meaningless – you’ll achieve all you want to achieve with girls but will still be unhappy at the end of it?
- Do you worry having too much sex is “disrespectful” to the girls you bang; do you worry about using them for sex? (That doesn’t have to be the case – it isn’t for me).
- Do you resent women? Are you jealous of them, or think they have it easier than guys, or hate that they get to be the choosers – they can reject you for any reason they want?
- What places are you scared to hit on girls? (Supermarket will give different anxiety vs train station vs a girl sitting down vs a girl walking fast, etc)
- Anything else you worry about, or any fears or “sticking points”?
3rd Batch of Questions:
- Do I deserve happiness?
- What does happiness mean to me?
- What do I want?
- What do I value?
- Do I deserve?
- Am I important?
- Are my needs more important than other people? Do I have the right to ask for what I want?
- What am I scared of? Is there anything I’m avoiding/putting off?
- (If you’re depressed) Is my depression serving me some purpose?
- What makes me happy?
- Is there something I’ve never dealt with?
- What am I grateful for?
- Is it ok if I’m not perfect? Is it ok if I’ll never be perfect?
- If I could change one thing about my life, what would it be?
- What’s stopping me from making that change right now? What’s holding me back?
- If I fail or run into some roadblocks, am I a failure?
- Am I honest with people? Could I be more open and real?
- What do I like about myself?
- What do I dislike about myself? If I could change anything, what would I change first?
- I most likely will never complete my todo list before I die (there’ll always be more to do). Am I ok with this? Am I ok with never getting everything done?
- Do I have a fear of death?
- Do I let my fear of death dictate my actions? Do I let my fear of death rule me and make me procrastinate working on my goals?
- What am I so afraid of?
- (If you’re depressed) Do I need my depression or can I let it go?
- Who are the people that are most important to me? Have I told people I’m grateful for them?
- (If you had a rough childhood or some past trauma) Did I deserve the bad things that happened to me? Did I “earn” those things or was it just random bad luck?
- What is the meaning of life?
- What is happiness?
- Why do we want things?
- What is existence?
- How did I come to be?
- Why am I here?
- Why does achieving a goal make me feel so good?
- Will we ever have everything we want? If not, is that still a satisfying/successful life?
Links mentioned in these episodes:
- If You Don’t Take Yourself Seriously, How Can You Expect Anyone Else to?
- What to Do When You Feel Hopeless and Helpless
- The Only Thing that Matters: Just Don’t Ever Fucking Quit
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