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Cover image by: Jon Tyson.

Here’s a lay story from recent times – and more importantly, discussion about the types of relationships and the types of girls I’m looking for these days. Long-gone are the days where pussy was fun by itself; the days where I didn’t mind if I had a one-night stand, as long as it meant another notch in my belt. The days where quality didn’t matter, her personality definitely didn’t matter, and all I cared about was getting my sausage sucked.

The more lays I’ve had, the more my standards have risen – not just standards in girls, but standards in the type of relationships I have. I’ll go into more discussion at the end of the article.

I met this girl using my usual BDSM line (shown in the screenshot below). As a reminder, here’s the Tinder profile I use these days (I was using a pretty similar set of photos back when I banged this girl).

The story below was originally posted on the Good Looking Loser Forums on Feb 2020. As always, any parts in blue are direct quotes from the old post I initially wrote.


3rd lay from Hinge in 11 days, and I’m not even trying – I’m focusing way more on my website than getting laid. I barely have any free time these days, which tells you how easy it is to bang on Hinge at the moment. Move over Tinder, Hinge is gonna take your crown.

She didn’t want me to take any photos of her (she was super shy), but literally said it was ok if I recorded her moaning. Go figure….

She was moaning like crazy while I fucked her, and you can hear me spanking her here, which she loved – she had this look of lust every time I did it:

So this girl was another girl who’s never ever tried toys – not even a vibrator. I have no idea how I keep meeting so many girls who’ve never tried a toy. How the fuck are there women out there who’ve never tried a vibrator? Mind blown.

She was VERY shy when we met up – turns out she’s never had sex on a first date and never really had casual sex. It’s always been relationships for her. She’s also never tried BDSM or any rough stuff. She’s tried mentioning it to some of her exes, but they always freaked out about it and judged her for it.

That’s one thing girls struggle with – most guys aren’t like the guys here. Most guys are weird and insecure about sex, and not really all that open-minded about kinky/rough sex. We have a skewed perception of what the average guy must be like, because in here, we’re ALL kinky and want to have sex. Most guys aren’t like that though. And all these poor girls want to try being tied up, having their hair pulled, etc – but they mention it to their boyfriends, and the boyfriends either dismiss it, or often try it but only half-heartedly. It’s not much fun if the guy isn’t really dominant by nature – it just comes off as limp-wristed.

So we grabbed a bottle of wine and took it back to my place and just hungout. We ended up talking for 2 hours before even fucking – she’s interesting as hell, pretty intelligent, very open-minded, and had some cool stories of her previous relationships and lack of BDSM/rough sex. I take my time when I find a girl who’s good to talk to, because they’re like 1 in 10.

Eventually made a move on her and she started moaning from the moment I put my hand on her neck. Took her to the bedroom, blindfolded her, covered her in baby oil and took my time teasing her. She started moaning as loudly as you hear in the video above – holy shit she was wild. Fucked her in every position I could think of, eventually nutted all over her blindfolded face, and the rest is history.

Not sure if I’ll see her again though. She’s not into the idea of playing with another girl – she said “It’s really not my thing, even if you paid me a million dollars I wouldn’t be into it. At all.” That makes it less fun, knowing I can’t share her with my girlfriend or any other girls. One of my goals is to have a 4some, and given I have limited time for meeting girls right now (busy with full-time job + coaching + writing), I don’t want to spend time on a girl who isn’t up for fooling around with other girls.


Toys Used:

(These are all affiliate links).


On the subject of this girl (and other girls) being afraid to bring up the subject of kinky sex with their partners: This is exactly why I mention in my Tinder guide you should aim to be as non-judgemental about sex as possible. The more open-minded you can be, the more she’ll be comfortable opening up to you about some of her fantasies and kinks – and the better the sex will be as a result. Sex where she’s having to hold back is never as good.

On the subject of not seeing her again: She was a hell of a lot of fun and I’m really glad we met, but her being completely against the idea of ever fooling around with my girl was a dealbreaker. I sent her the text I recommend here.

It might sound a little nuts to hear me say, “If a girl doesn’t ever wanna bang my girlfriend, that’s a dealbreaker.” It might sound nuts to say I’m pretty much only looking for 3somes (or girls who are open to a 3some later on down the track) – and it might seem nuts for me to not see her again, especially when the sex was so good. But when you’ve had more than enough sex, when you get beyond the point of sexual apathy, you get to a point where you’re only willing to bang a new girl if she brings something new to the table. Sex just for sex’s sake becomes a bit… empty.

In essence, I’m referring to the things I discussed in Eventually You’ll End Up Settling Down. The stage I’m at now is building something with my girlfriend – we’ve been together for several years, she adds a hell of a lot to my life, and sex with other girls is something I want to share with her (rather than me going off and banging girls by myself). It’s just not as much fun by myself, and to some degree, it feels “weird” doing it separately from my girlfriend. Like I’m off having a fun adventure that she’s not invited to. Like I’m building something with some other girl, instead of her.

A good analogy is it’s like if you went to an amazing restaurant and had the best meal ever… but then you weren’t allowed to take any of your friends to the restaurant. It might be fun once or twice by yourself, but it’s much better shared.

I also require the girls I/we bang to be building towards something themselves – what I talked about here. She has to be a very openminded girl who wants to work on her sexual bucketlist with me/my girl. Or she has to be into doing photoshoots with me, and be cool with me putting them on my site. Or she has to be working on her own self-improvement and building something in her own life I can get share in (eg her own business, or career, or making herself a better person, etc). In short, I’m no longer looking for meaningless, throwaway sex – that stopped being fun a long time ago.

This girl was actually the catalyst for me being even more upfront with girls on Tinder and telling them before we even meet that I’m only looking for bisexual/bicurious girls. I ask them this question before we meet:

Ever fooled around with another girl, or thought about it?”

If the answer isn’t “yes” or “I’d like to try one day”, then I don’t meet her. Best not to waste anybody’s time.

In future I’ll be writing more content around non-monogamy, open relationships, jealousy, figuring out the dynamic that works best for you and your main girl, when to transition from your “player” phase to your more serious “starting to settle down” phase, etc. In the mean time if you have any specific questions, drop a comment below and I’ll answer. Same goes if you have a particular topic you’d like to get my thoughts on – suggest it and I’ll write an article about it.

I’m interested to hear your thoughts on non-monogamy/open relationships. Have you tried one? Did it work out for you? Was it smooth sailing, or were there hurdles you had to overcome? Drop a comment below and share.


Yo, Andy here. I’m an Aussie guy who went from a depressed, suicidal loser to a guy who gets laid regularly, has 3somes & BDSM sex, crushes weights at the gym & loves his life. I killed my inner loser. It's my mission to get you to kill your inner loser too.